Shattered Serenity
by chryseis dione
Summary: Zechs and Noin's daughter is growing up in a world where peace is growing more fragile. Politics are leading to chaos. In the middle of this is one lonely girl, desperate to prove herself and live up to her parents. *Complete* New poems added at the end.
1. Chapter One

Shattered Serenity  
  
I do not own Gundam Wing. They all belong to Sunrise and Sotsu Agencies. However, Tamara and Calen, etc.. are mine. This is a long piece cobbled together from little ideas that flew into my head. Please enjoy it.   
  
Chapter One  
Lucrezia Noin woke before sunrise, shivering in her bed. She got up and pulled on her robe and made her way over to the sliding glass doors that went out to her patio off the back of her apartment. It was early still, about six fifteen, and the traffic had not started yet. For a while, she just looked around her neighborhood, thinking how much she would miss the cozy little apartment in the Sanc Kingdom. The cold December air was frigid and had filled her apartment when she had left the door open last night. Oh well. She had other things on her mind last night.  
She made her way to the kitchen and started some coffee. Stacks of paperwork and boxes full of miscellaneous objects were scattered about her kitchen. There was still so much left for her to do, and so little time to do it in. She took a seat in front of one stack of paperwork. Grabbing a pen, she dug into the work. Part of it was personal finance records, but part of it was the annual Preventer budget that she always took care of. She had always liked numbers and figures, they had seemed so certain, whereas people were so unpredictable, not simple or trustworthy. The math frustrated her sometimes and she thought about giving it all to Zechs to figure out. Just like the old days, she thought, remembering their academy days. We used to study together, and I would get so frustrated when I didn't understand something. "Have a little patience, Lu. We'll get this thing yet," he used to tell me. Where have the years gone?  
The coffee pot spurted and sputtered, it's noise filling the silence. Noin began to hum a tune as she labored over the papers. She only had two days to get everything finished up and be ready to move out. After that, she would be off to the new Mars colony to work on the Terraforming project. And what was more, Zechs would be going with her. And everything is real, she told herself with a smile, Not just a dream. "Coffee?" came a sleepy voice from behind her. She turned around to see Zechs, dressed neatly, but with his long platinum blonde hair in disarray.  
"Sure. There should be some in the pot," she answered, getting up from her chair and facing Zechs. The former prince and pilot stumbled over to the pot of brewing coffee and poured two cups of the steaming liquid. He handed Noin hers wordlessly, and began to sip his, an exhausted look on his face. She took one look at Zech's face, and started to laugh. "You never were a morning person, Zechs." He shot a reproving glance at her.  
"It's your fault. You didn't let me sleep until late at night. And plus, you kept rolling over onto MY side of the bed."  
"I thought we established that the left side was my side. I always sleep on the left side," she argued, still smiling.  
"No. I always sleep on the end away from the door, and that is the left side. And besides, you kick, too," he argued, still sleepy and slightly annoyed. He plopped down in a chair at the table. "This isn't going to work out, is it? We can't even go twelve hours without teasing each other."  
"That's only because we've known each other so long. And I've known you long enough to remember that you have always hated getting up in the morning. I recall you trying to shoot a few songbirds with your pistol once because you thought they were too cheerful." Noin giggled at that memory.  
"It was too early for anything to be cheerful. Those stupid birds," he mumbled incoherently. The coffee was beginning to take effect on his brain, and he was gradually waking up. Zechs valued sleep, even though it was a rare luxury for an officer and pilot. He was thoroughly exhausted after the Mariemaia affair, and didn't know if he would be able to go directly to Mars and begin a new project.  
Lucrezia Noin looked out at the horizon beyond the city. The first traces of color were beginning to creep into the sky. Morning was arriving. "Let's go watch the sun rise," she said, leaving her papers behind and grabbing Zechs hand. He obediently followed her out to the patio, coffee still in hand. She sat on the small bench and gazed out to the horizon. "Don't you just love all the colors?" she asked, trying to start a conversation.  
"I suppose."  
"I suppose? What kind of an answer is that? Can't you be romantic for once?"  
"It's too early to be romantic. Will you settle for sarcastic and cynical?" came the reply. Noin only gave him a sideways glance and leaned against him as they watched the sun rise over the horizon. He looked down at her as the sun creeped closer to them. Only two more days before they would leave for Mars. I wonder if there will be sunsets on Mars? he wondered. I suppose I should enjoy these while they last. He scooted in close to her and put an arm around her. As the sun came over the horizon, it shown down on the two Preventers, making Noin's diamond ring sparkle brilliantly in the morning light.  
  



	2. Chapter Two

Chapter Two  
"Home sweet home," Noin murmured as she began to open the last few boxes with her pocket knife. She glanced around the new quarters on the Mars colony, taking in all the details of her new home. Of their new home. It was almost sweet, their first home together. It was quite a bit bigger than the individual barrack-like rooms that they had stayed in for the few weeks or so. Once the main residence building was up, Noin immediately found quarters for her as well as Zechs on the top floor where they would have a nice view.  
Noin began to unpack picture frames and old books, including a yearbook from the Academy. She paged through to find pictures of them as kids. She spotted a picture of the both of them at graduation, as well as one in the miscellaneous section. It depicted the two young cadets arguing with each other as they walked away from two mobile suits. Memories flooded back to her as she flipped through the pages.  
Suddenly, Noin was overcome by another wave of nausea. Oh no, she thought bitterly. Not again. Will this stupid flu ever go away? She hadn't had a fever, but she had nausea and aches lately, as well as the terrible urge to sleep all day. It was aggravating to be sick, and the Tylenol she was taking wasn't helping. Her fiancée had been bothering her to go to a doctor all week, but she had weaseled out of it one way or another each time. Noin laid down to wait it out, hoping the feeling would merely pass. For awhile, silence ruled the small apartment. Then, a voice broke the silence.  
"Anybody home?" Vice Foreign Minister Relena Darlian poked her head inside the door. The sixteen year old girl made her way through the living room to the small bedroom. She was followed by her older brother, who was looking concerned. Relena smiled as she went into the room and sat down beside Noin. "Not feeling well?" she asked, her smile changing into one of sympathy instead of joy.  
"I'll be just fine," Noin replied, pushing herself up. She spotted Zechs near the doorway, who was looking in at them as if he were trying to spy on them. Something was up, she just knew it. And then, before she knew it, another wave of nausea hit and she ran for the bathroom. Pushing past the surprised foreign minister, she ran down the hall. Relena looked confused and followed the Preventer agent. As she got closer, she could hear her brother and Noin in the bathroom. The door was closed, so she pressed her ear to the door, feeling a little guilty for listening in.  
"It's okay, Lu. It's going to be alright."  
"I don't need your help, Zechs. I'm feeling much..." From the sounds of it, Relena decided that Noin was probably throwing up. Zechs had been telling her all week how Noin had been sick and wouldn't see a doctor. He had been worried, and said that every time he suggested that she go in for a checkup, she had snapped at him and wouldn't see him or talk to him for days. He also told her that he had spent more time at the embassy hiding then he did at home.  
"You know, it's okay to be sick. I care about you, and I don't want you to get sick. You have to take care of yourself."  
"I am not sick! I just don't feel well right now. Why don't you just leave me alone? I get along just fine on my own. I managed to survive a whole year without you, you know. You can't always protect me, baby me as if I were an infant."  
"Please, let's not fight now. It's not good for..." The rest of the snetence was cut off, and Relena sighed and stepped back from the door. Poor Milliardo, she thought. He just doesn't understand. She thought for a while, then decided to interrupt. She opened the door, only to find Noin kneeling on the floor near the toilet, with her brother right beside the other woman, brushing her hair back.  
Upon seeing Relena, Noin struggled to stand, angrily letting Zechs help her up. I don't need everyone's help, she thought, annoyed that everyone was so worried over her. The nausea was over, and she was beginning to feel a little better. "Sorry about that, Relena. Guess I'm feeling a little under the weather today." Noin pointedly pulled her arm away from Zechs, trying to show him that she could stand up by herself. "I think it's over now."  
"Miss Noin, I was going to ask you if you would like to go somewhere with me today, if you are feeling better," the sixteen year old suggested. Noin looked a little upset at the comment, but nodded.  
"Just let me freshen up a bit. I can be ready to go in a few minutes," Noin explained, reaching for a hairbrush. The two Peacecrafts stepped back, and out of the bathroom, leaving Noin to clean up and complain about how stubborn they were.  
Once they were back in the living room, Relena turned to her brother. "So she's been like this all week?"  
"Yes. And you think that she was upset this time? You should have seen her three days ago. I try to be supportive and she thinks I'm sheltering her. So I try to let her have her space and she tells me that I'm insensitive!" he complained.  
"I meant the nausea and sickness, Milliardo."  
He sighed, closing his eyes for a while. "She's had this nausea thing for a while, and keeps complaining about being sore or tired. And it's not like her to complain. She just hasn't been herself lately." The two Peacecrafts waited for Noin patiently. Eventually, she came into the living room, looking much better. She had changed out of her previous attire and into a blouse and blue jeans. Her hair was neatly combed, and she did not look like someone who had just been sick. Relena smiled, and led the two out to the limousine that was waiting for them ouside the apartment.  
The ride was quiet for awhile, but after ten minutes or so, Noin spoke up. "Where are you taking us?" she asked, looking out the window at the Mars landscape. "Don't tell me that we've got business to take care of."  
"No, Miss Noin, there is no business for you today. Milliardo took care of it for you," Relena replied. "And as for where I'm taking you, it's a surprise." Zechs grinned. He and Relena had been planning this since before she left Earth. It was the only way he could ever get Noin to do it. The car ride continued in silence, with Noin just looking around at the brother and sister sitting patiently in the limo. Relena looks like she has something planned. I don't like the look on her face. Zechs is probably in on this, too. I wonder what's going on.  
Her question was answered when they pulled up in front of the Colony's hospital. Noin recognized the building at once, and turned to the Zechs and Relena to argue, but she was silenced. "Please try to understand, Miss Noin. Milliardo and I are only trying to help you get better. It is important that you cooperate with us and with Doctor Weber." They led her inside, and checked in with the receptionist, who greeted them kindly.  
"So, Agent Noin, not feeling well? You can just go on back to the appointment room, and Dr. Weber will be right back," she explained, scribbling busily on a sheet. Noin nodded her head, and made her way back to a room in the back hallway. Zechs excused himself, saying that he had some things to take care of at the office, and Relena told him to send the car back in an hour or so.  
He left reluctantly, but Relena had insisted that he give her some space. He kept glancing back over his shoulder as he left her with his sister. During the past few weeks, he had worried about her health. For the first few days after they got engaged, they had talked earnestly about kids and a family. Noin had wanted to go in and make sure they could have a baby. He hoped in his soul that nothing would change their dreams for the future.  
*  
Relena dropped the tired Preventer agent off at her apartment, and asked Noin to send her regards to her brother. Noin only nodded and climbed out. She made her way in, crossing through the hall and waiting in the elevator. It stalled for a while, and Noin sighed impatiently. She watched as the lights clicked down, signaling that the elevator was coming back to the ground floor. She was trying to decide on what to say when she got home, not finding the perfect words.  
The elevator door opened, and Zechs was waiting for her inside. He saw the look of exhaustion and despair on her face, and his good mood faded. "What's wrong, Lucrezia? Are you going to be alright?" His partner only looked at him, her face full of emotion. Her eyes started to sparkle with tears. Zechs was getting more and more worried by the second. "What's wrong?" he repeated, so quiet that his voice was barely audible. She didn't answer him, starting to cry in earnest. She just wept and wept all the way up to their apartment.  
They made their way inside, and he fixed her a cup of tea as she dried her tears. She opened her mouth to say something, but when she saw him, she fell quiet. Zechs was confused, and sat down beside her. "You know, I can't help you if you don't tell me what's wrong," he pleaded.  
Well, this is it, Noin thought to herself. You're going to have to tell him sooner or later, so just get it over with. "Zechs, I know that we... well, what I want to tell you is that..." her voice trailed off, and she lowered her head, not able to find the words she needed.  
"What?" he asked softly, bringing her face up so her gaze met his.  
"I'm going to have a baby. We're going to have a baby." His jaw dropped, and he stared for a while. Neither spoke for a few minutes, which seemed like hours. Zechs broke the silence.  
"Is that all? You're going to be alright?"  
"Yeah, I guess. But what are we going to do? Are we ready to have kids yet? It's early in the first trimester. I could have," she paused to gasp in more breath, "an abortion."  
"No," he said firmly, taking her hands in his. "We planned to have them eventually anyway. We might as well start now. What did the doctor say when you were at the hospital?" Noin smiled a sad smile and recounted her visit with Dr. Weber.  
"Well, she said it probably happened around Christmas, give or take a few days. The baby is developing normally, and should be due in about eight months. So that means it will be born in," she paused to count, "October sometime."  
"Let's get married next month."  
"What? Zechs, what are you talking about?"  
"Well, we planned the wedding for this summer, right?"  
"Yes. We had it planned for July. Why are we changing this?"  
"I don't think that you'll be able to fit in that wedding dress by July," he joked. Noin picked up a pillow and hit him over the head with it. He grabbed another pillow off the couch, and jumped up. Soon the little apartment was filled with the joyous sound of the two, running back and forth about the apartment having the time of their lives.  



	3. Chapter Three

Chapter Three  
The climate on Earth during February was cold, but it was warm inside the little church. There weren't many people in the church, only a few friends. Zechs was standing up at the altar, more nervous than he had ever been. Heero stood solemnly in the place of the best man, not saying a word. The music began, and the groom's heart jumped. This was it, the big moment.  
Mariemaia started up the aisle carrying her basket full of rose petals. Then, Noin emerged from the back of the cathedral. He had seen the dress several times, but he had never seen it actually on her. The fabric draped beautifully, and the beaded design was lovely. He could tell that her belly was just beginning to swell with the baby, but no one else would notice. But despite the minor changes, she was more beautiful now than she had ever been before. It seemed like an eternity before she reached the altar, when he was able to take her hand and kneel beside her.  
The service was short, but meaningful. They hadn't wanted a long, fancy wedding, just short, elegant ceremony with family and friends. Before either of them knew it, Heero was holding out a wedding ring. Zechs nervously took the ring, and repeated after the priest, nervous that he would say something wrong. But he didn't, and it seemed as if the whole world stopped when he slipped the ring on her finger. And then, he felt a cold metal ring slide onto his own finger. And now, the best part.  
"By the power vested in me and by the Sanc Kingdom, I now pronounce you husband and wife. You may now kiss the bride," stated the priest. He smiled at her as he pulled back the veil. At last, we can just live our lives together. Never again to be torn apart or separated.  
Later, everyone headed over to Relena's manor for the reception. The new couple were beaming, their happiness was contagious. Duo and Hilde were there, and as usual, Duo was in a good mood. He bounced about greeting everyone that he hadn't seen in a long time. Quatre had managed to get away from the Winner family business long enough to come to Earth, and he approached the two.  
"The wedding was lovely, Miss Noin. Well, I guess it's not Noin any more. What should I call you?" he asked.  
"Noin is fine," she replied. "I'm used to being called Noin, I don't think I could get used to being called by a different name." The blonde Arabian boy nodded, and went to go find some of the others. Zechs laughed.  
"So, it's Mrs. Lucrezia Peacecraft now. Or is it Lucrezia Merquise? Which do you like better?"  
"I think Lucrezia Peacecraft sounds better," she said thoughtfully. "That brings up an important question. What are we going to do about the legal mess? You're supposed to be dead, and it wouldn't look very good to be getting married a year after you were supposed to have died."  
Zechs had an answer for that. "Relena has some connections that will fix everything up. And the baby's birth certificate will be altered when it comes along. I promise, I have everything taken care of. It will all be perfectly legal. The baby will be a Peacecraft." Zechs led her over and they started to dance to the music playing in the backround. It was like a reunion, seeing everyone again. Noin watched as Relena danced with Heero, who looked like he was trying to think about a mission while Relena tried to start a conversation. Dorothy and Quatre were arguing heatedly about the principals of war and peace, while Hilde was dragging Duo out to dance with her.  
Lady Une, on the other hand, was sitting out on the side, watching after Mariemaia. She had a wistful look on her face everytime she looked at the two newlyweds, and Noin quickly became concerned. At the end of the dance, she walked over to Une. "Come on Lady Une. Have a little fun. Or do we need to break out the wine again?" she joked.  
Une looked sad, and got up from her spot. "Trieze should have been here," she whispered. "It should've been him, not Heero." She looked down at the ground. "Do you remember how it used to be? With Trieze and Zechs, the best of friends, and us, the worst of enemies.And now... "  
Noin forced a smile. "I know. Amazing what a lot of grief and a bottle or two of wine can do for a friendship!" Her expression became more serious as she comforted her friend. "You knew Trieze better than I did, but I don't think he would have wanted you to sit around gloomily." Lady Une forced a smile and walked over to the table with the cake.  
"You know, I dreamed of a wedding like this," she mumbled as she looked up at it. Her thoughts were interrupted when Duo announced that it was time for a toast. Zechs snuck up behind Noin and swept her away. She started laughing and yelling at him to put her down, and Lady Une started to laugh herself. Nothing has changed, she thought.   
They crowded around the long table as Heero and Duo started pouring champagne. To everyone's surprised, Lady Une took charge of the toast. "To Zechs and Noin," she announced. "I have only one word to say to you on the night of your wedding. Finally!" The entire party laughed softly, and sipped their champagne.  
"Were we really that obvious?" Zechs asked Lady Une once the toast was over.  
"Painfully obvious. You've practically been engaged since you were seventeen."  
"You talked to Noin didn't you?" Lady Une nodded, and Zechs shot a glance over at his new wife. "When did you two become best friends? I leave for a year, and suddenly everything changes."  
"You want to know what happened? You guys decided to go get yourself killed and leave us alone," Noin replied. Zechs started to protest, but Noin continued. "And you! You left without even dropping by to let me know you were alive! Remind me why I married you?"  
"Because we're in love?" he tried, playing along with her game.  
"Pathetic reasoning, sir. I demand a better reason." He gave her a long kiss then, and they could hear Duo whistling in the backround. "Good reason..." she mumbled. Then, she stood up and tapped a spoon on the side of a glass. "Everyone, I have a little announcement to make." They all turned their heads to Noin, listening carefully. "In October, I'm going to have a baby!" she announced happily.  
"A baby?!" Lady Une exclaimed. "You two are having a baby?"  
"Yes," Zechs answered. "But we have all the problems sorted out. We hope that we can stay with Preventer as well as take care of the baby." Everyone had questions, and the night went on pleasantly. Zechs couldn't help but feel that tonight was the best night of his life. After all the years of war, they could have a normal life and worry about babies instead of battles and diapers instead of destruction. So this is what we've been fighting, he thought. And we have made a world safe for our children and their future.  



	4. Chapter Four

Chapter Four  
Zechs woke up to the sound of the blender whirring in the kitchen. He got up out of bed and, pulling on his robe, made his way to the origin of the noise. Sure enough, there was Lucrezia, her bucket of ice cream still laying on the counter. She was getting out the glasses, and finally caught a glimpse of him from behind the cupboard door. "Good morning, Zechs. Care to join me for a peanut butter and brocolli milkshake?"  
"No thank you," he said, making a disgusted face. "Lucrezia, are you aware that it is three AM?"  
"Of course I am. I was kind of hungry and the baby is sort of restless. Please stay up with me," she begged him. "You could finish that blanket you were knitting..." Noin trailed off, giggling at him again.  
"That knitting thing is your fault. I hate knitting," Zechs complained, glancing over at Noin's knitting basket.  
"Oh, come on, you know you love it. And you're so good at it, too. I bet lots of women wish they could knit as well as you do." She had the giggles now, and couldn't stop herself.  
Zechs yawned a deep yawn and closed in on his wife. "Please come back to bed. We both need to get some sleep. You can stay up all night when the baby comes."  
"I know, but I can't sleep. The baby is really kicking in there. I guess she decided that it's not time to sleep." She rested a hand in her belly, which had slowly gotten bigger and bigger. It had forced her to take maternity leave, which angered her. She wanted to keep working as long as possible. However, Lady Une had flat out told her to quit for a while and come back after she had recovered from the pregnancy.  
Zechs knelt down and pressed his hand against her abdomen. He could feel the baby kick and move inside of her, and couldn't help but marvel at how wonderful it felt to feel the tiny living thing that he and Noin had created. "She's going to be feisty," he remarked. Noins face suddenly changed, and she grimaced. Zechs could feel her shudder and pulled his hand away. "What's wrong? Is it time?" he asked nervously, adrenaline building in his system. "Do I need to call Sally?" It was October second, two days past the due date, and they had been nervously waiting for the baby all week.  
"I'm not sure. Sally said that there may be false contractions for a while. But this feel different," she explained, wincing again. "I think it may be..." Before she could say anything more, she felt some of the pressure release. Zechs watched as fluid soaked through Noin's nightgown. "Oh no." In a split second, he was dashing for the phone.  
He dialed while running to get their stuf for the hospital. "Please get up.." he mumbled to himself, grabbing a spare set of clothing for them both. Lucrezia was yelling at him to hurry, telling him that the contractions were getting worse. At last, Sally picked up and answered groggily. "Sally! Noin's started labor. I think her water just broke, so I'm bringing her in to the hospital. She says the contractions are getting worse."  
Sally was surprised at how nervous her fellow Preventer sounded, and stayed calm. "I'll be there as soon as I can," she reassured, but it was unnecessary. Zechs had turned off the phone and was helping a very upset Lucrezia into their car. He jumped in the drivers seat as quickly as he could and took off down the road.  
"I definitely think it's time," Noin stated flatly, breathing deeply.  
"Can you hang on until we get to the hospital?" Zechs asked, praying that the answer would be yes.  
"I think so," came the reply. He looked over at her. She had her hands resting on her stomach, and was looking straight ahead. He could hear her doing the breathing exercises Sally had taught her. At last, their baby girl was on her way. After months of morning sickness, mood swings, and strange food cravings, the baby was going to be born.  
They pulled up in front of the hospital before long, and Sally was waiting for them with a wheelchair. Noin hauled herself out of the car and into the wheelchair. Sally could hear her breathing heavily. "How close together are the contractions?" she asked the couple.  
"About twenty minutes apart." Zechs told her worriedly. "Is that good or bad?"  
Sally only frowned. "Didn't you have any contractions that were further apart? When did these things start?"  
"I thought they were those false contractions! How was I supposed to know if they were real or not?" Noin said, wincing. They rolled her into the hospital and through the halls. The secretary stopped Zechs at the desk. She handed him a stack of papers to fill out, but would not let him go with Noin, despite his protests.  
"I'll be back soon, Lucrezia, I promise," he told her.  
"No! I'm not having this baby until you're there. You're not leaving me again!" she fumed. She was getting angry, and felt like taking all this anger out on someone or something. She heard Sally mutter something to the effect of "Oh no," and gritted her teeth. I am not going to do this without you, Zechs. The contractions were getting worse, and she could only watch as they wheeled her away from her husband.  
Zechs filled out the forms as fast as he could. His goal was to get back to Noin as quickly as possible. He could hear her voice from down the hallway. "Aaaghhhhh! Why won't these things stop? Just pull this thing out!" he heard her yell. Oh no. This will be even worse than the mood swings. Do I really want to go back there? It was quiet for a while and then... "I will NOT calm down. I want him here and I want him now!" There was a pause. "Listen here, Sal, I will not have a baby until I have him next to me. And when he's here, I'm going to throttle him!" The former pilot gulped. The nurse was glancing nervously over at him, a look of curiosity on her face. Zechs just filled out the forms faster.  
"I'm going to kill him! How dare he do this to me! Where is he?" Another pause. Sally must be trying to comfort her. "I don't care where that baby is right now. She is not coming out until he gets here!" Zechs debated whether to go in or run away from the outraged Noin.  
"Ouch! Okay, okay, I'll send him in," came Sally's voice. Zechs glanced nervously over to the nurse, as if to ask permission. She nodded, a look of fear on her face.  
"Good luck," she told him, and he nodded. He was going to need it. He headed back through the hallway. Sally was heading towards him, and looked relieved to see him. He could see the marks on Sally's hand, one of which was beginning to bleed.  
"Beware," she warned. "When she's like this, she'll draw blood.""  
"So I see," he replied, accepting the medical gown and mask from his colleague. "How far along is she?"  
"That baby will be coming any time now. She's really eager to get out. I think her mother is ready to have her out, too. Noin's about seven centimeters dialated. Any later, and you would have had to deliver the baby in the car." They entered the birthing room, seeing Noin lying on a hospital bed with a nurse hovering around her. Her eyes lit up when she saw Zechs, and he nervously crossed over to stand by her side. She immediately grapped onto his hand and squeezed it as tight as she could.  
"I thought you weren't going to make it. Please don't leave me," she begged, loosening her grip a little.  
"I won't leave you, Lu. I promise," he comforted. "Now you need to push. Soon, it will all be over." He looked down as Sally got out the needle for the epidural. Her look begged him to distract her until she could apply the medicine, and Zechs gave her a slight nod. "Won't it be nice to have the baby out? And we can take her home and put her in that crib in the room that we painted. Do you remember painting that room for the new baby?"  
"Of course I remember!" Noin snapped, pushing as hard as she could. Suddenly, she felt a poke, then, part of her went numb. She grasped onto her husband's hand tightly. "I think the baby's coming now," she mumbled, still trying to relax and breathe.  
"Think of your exercises, Lucrezia. Take a deep breath and help me time the contractions. This isn't any harder that combat." To Zechs' surprise, his wife grabbed a bunch of his hair and yanked it down so they were face to face. The pilot grimaced, and looked into Noin's furious eyes sheepishly.  
"This is ten times worse than any pain you could experience. Imagine having the skin burned off your body and having as many broken bones as Saturn has moons. That's how painful childbirth is, only worse, so don't talk to me about combat. If you don't shut up right now with your calm and happy routine, I will personally tear every strand of hair out of your scalp."  
Sally was chuckling slightly at her friend's threats, but was still fully aware of the labor. She made a few checks and announced that the cervix was fully dialated. It was time to start pushing. Noin took in the deep breath as she had been taught. Her husband could feel her crush his hand with every push. At least she had let go of his hair. He kept trying to coach her, ignoring the curses and insults coming from the laboring woman. This was even worse than the mood swings.  
"Here she comes. Zechs, I need your help over here," Sally called. Zechs removed his hand from Noin's grasp and moved over to Sally. The baby's head was slowly emerging, and Sally was helping to ease the tiny thing out. It's like a tiny miracle. I can't believe that it's coming out of Lucrezia, he thought to himself. Sally instructed him to fetch some towels to dry the baby off with and a receiving blanket to wrap it in. He quickly complied, and handed her the things she needed."Keep pushing," Sally urged.  
Soon, the shoulders were out, and the hips of their tiny baby were almost out. Zechs hovered next to Sally, worried about his wife. The labor had been going well and Sally said it was pretty quick for a first child. He was glad that they had an experienced doctor like her to help them. The Preventer agent was brought back to reality when Sally started to call him. "Do you want to deliver your daughter?" she asked. He nodded, and did as she told him to.  
The baby was so small, and finally, it's tiny feet came out. Zechs had the newborn in his hands and it was covered in blood and fluids, its tiny eyes still closed. Sally cut the umbilical cord, and handed him a few towels. Carefully, he dried her off and wrapped the tiny thing up in the blankets. And then, it began to cry! Startled, he looked frantically over at Sally, who was taking care of the afterbirth. "It's okay, Zechs," she reassured. "It just means she has healthy, well developed lungs. You'd better get used to crying." For the longest time, he just held the tiny thing in his arms, not able to believe the love that he felt for this delicate creature, this tiny miracle. Time passed, and all he knew was that tiny child and it's mother, and the new role that he had to play.  
The new father walked over to his wife, who looked exhausted. Gently, he relinquished the tiny bundle into Noin's arms. "Look at how tiny she is!" she marveled. She's so beautiful. The baby cautiously opened it's eyes. Both parents gasped. "Look at those eyes! She has your eyes," Noin marveled.  
"I disagree. I think Lucia has darker eyes, like yours."  
"No, she doesn't. Melea's eyes are closer to a nail blue."  
"I thought we decided on Lucia Anne," Zechs argued.  
"No. I'm her mother, and I say her name is Melea Katerina." There was a knock on the door and Sally went to open it. She conversed quietly with someone outside, then turned to the new parents.  
"Are you up for visitors? Relena, Lady Une, and Mariemaia are here," she asked.  
Noin nodded, and Sally let the two in. Relena went over to her brother right away. "Congratulations Milliardo! We caught the first shuttle we could as soon as we heard. Is it a girl like you planned?"  
"It is," he answered, glancing back at the tiny bundle in Noin's arms. "All she needs now is a name. We just can't seem to agree on one."  
"What about Tamara? That's a pretty name," Relena suggested.  
Noin tried the name out. "Tamara Melea Peacecraft. I like it,"  
"Tamara Lucia Peacecraft," Zechs corrected. Sally sensed an argument brewing and stepped in.  
"What about Tamara Victoria?" she asked.  
"Tamara Victoria Peacecraft it is then. A beautiful name for a beautiful little girl," Noin said softly.  
Mariemaia watched the new baby, riveted. "So that's your new baby? She sure is tiny! Did she really come out of you?" she asked. Lady Une put a hand on the child's head. Noin smiled.  
"What do you think of her, Mariemaia? You know, you were a baby once, just like her," she said, her voice suddenly quiet. The group carried on for some time. At last, Zechs turned around to find his wife fast asleep. Gently, he scooped the new baby up into his arms. He was so proud of this tiny bundle. They could raise her to be a pacifist, and she would live in a world free of hate and war. Sally chased everyone else out, and left the couple alone with their newborn.  
"She's such a miracle," he marveled, sitting down in a chair. "A tiny miracle." He watched as the tiny child fell asleep. I hope I will be a good father, he thought. And I hope that she will be a good kid. He laid the infant down in a small bassinet, and leaned back in the chair. It had been quite a day.  



	5. Chapter Five

Chapter Five  
I had a happy childhood. I got a great deal of attention from my parents despite their busy schedules. Part of my childhood was spent in their offices at the embassy, where I could play while my mom and dad worked. From the very start, I knew that they had important, dangerous jobs. Every so often, one of them would go off on a business trip for a few weeks or so. And when they both had to leave, we would go on a shuttle to Earth so I could stay with one of my many aunts and uncles.  
When I was a small child, I wondered how my mom and dad could have so many brothers and sisters. I once asked Aunt Hilde why this was. She laughed and told me that they weren't really related, that they were just good friends, except for Aunt Relena, who was really my dad's sister. I liked staying with Aunt Relena, mostly because sometimes Uncle Heero would be there and he would teach me about computers.  
For as long as I can remember, my parents taught me all about Earth and the Sanc Kingdom. There was a mural of it on my bedroom walls, and I even had a few books about it. And yet, it was the colonies that I loved. I like to think of Mars Colony as my home. I don't know what it was about space that attracted me to it, but I knew that I loved it.  
Everyone says I look like my dad because I have the same long platinum blonde hair. Dad says I'm going to be tall and graceful like my mom, and I hope that's true. My dad always says he can see my Mom in my face, which puzzles me. My mother swears that I also have his eyes, but Dad argues that my eyes are dark blue, not nail blue. I have yet to figure out why they love to argue so much.  
I was ready to start school by four, and Mom was worried at first. My dad was supposed to have died in a war a long time ago, so I guess I shouldn't have been born. And so I entered school as Tamara Victoria Noin, a five year old. Mother told me that it was part of an important secret, one I couldn't even tell to my best friend. I understood that. I had to protect my dad so he could do his job. I was good at keeping secrets.  
My first few years at school were hard. The other kids didn't like me much, so I hid underneath the playsets on the playground with a book or two during recess. I don't know why the other kids didn't like me, and I tried so hard to make them like me. They seemed to get angry when I raised my hand in class, so I tried not to raise my hand, but my teacher called on me anyway. I tried to be good during gym class so they would like me, but no one would talk to me. There was a time when I would have given anything not to be picked last for teams in gym. But that never happened. My parents wanted to know if I was making friends, so I lied and told them I was.  
After a while, my parents decided to send me to another school. This school was a boarding school, where I could stay. This let my mom and dad work more, so I went away gladly. This school was no different than the last one, although I was beginning to understand why they didn't want to be friends with me. I didn't think or speak like they did. I was different than they were. But I became used to it.  
And then, one teacher changed my life. She gave me more work than the other kids and when I asked why, she said that I needed to be challenged. That's when I began to seek out challenges to make myself stronger. While other students spent their time partying and hanging out with their friends, I was learning things like martial arts and how to do things with computers. I was known as the school geek, but I didn't care. I was learning so many interesting new things.  
By the time I was 10, I was used to the routine of school. I was happy trying to come up with new challenges for myself. And all of a sudden, the accident happened. Later, I found out that the militarists on Earth were restless and wanted to start trouble.   
I was on my way to dinner when the explosion happened. I can't remember much after that. I woke up to see my parents hovering over me in the hospital. And when I felt my face, I could feel the bangdages and stitches that covered it. The doctors all said I was lucky I didn't lose my right eye. However, the right side of my face would be scarred forever. To hide my scars, I brushed my hair down over my eyes like my mom did.  
I never returned to that little school. I had my sights set on the Civilian Academy at Lake Victoria. It was supposed to be the finest school on Earth, so I thought of it as a great new challenge. My parents had gone to it when they were young, and I got my middle name from that school. At first, my mom didn't want me to go because it used to be a military academy, but I wanted to go so badly. I think Dad understood my need to go there. And so I went to Earth, leaving my precious colony behind, headed for a new challenge.  



	6. Chapter Six

Chapter Six  
"Sweetie, are you sure this is where you want to go? Lake Victoria is so far away!" Lucrezia Noin-Peacecraft asked for the millionth time. There were two sighs coming from the other room.  
"Mom, I think I've made up my mind alreay. I'm 10 years old, let me make my own decisions. It's a civilian academy now. There's nothing to worry about," Tamara reassured. She rolled her eyes and returned to packing her suitcase with her father. The little memories that had come back to them during the packing had been priceless.  
"Don't forget this," he told her, handing her the tiny model of Epyon that moved around. "Duo gave that to you when you were only 4 years old. You and Adam Maxwell were always playing gundam. That worried your mother and I so badly!"  
"Oh Dad," the young girl sighed. "Don't worry. She stood up as tall as she could and imitated her mother's voice. "I know that I am the last of the Peacecraft line, and must uphold the principles of peace and pacifism." She relaxed and watched her father smile at her.  
"Good impression," he told his daughter lightly. "I know you understand how important that is to us, though. Peace is the way of the future." Tamara returned to packing hoping to avoid another lecture. With all the talk of peace and pacifism, Tamara was about ready to become a real gundam pilot. Her mother came in to supervise, and the girl quickly realized what would happen next. Her father got up and walked over to her and Tamara simply became very involved in her packing. To the 10 year old, kissing was still a very gross thing.  
"You know Tamara, if you ever get bored at Victoria, there's a way out. It leads to the lake itself, which is the best place to go for some peace and quiet. Just take the hallway on the third floor and go through the little room on the left marked 'janitor'. Then..." her father started to say before he was silenced.  
"Zechs! Shame on you! Teaching her things like that! I think there may be some work for you in the kitchen," her mother chided. Tamara giggled at the scolding. Her father left sheepishly, and her mother leaned close to the little girl's ear.  
"Your father nearly got caught four times going that way. If you really want to get out of the dormitories, take the pipe room. There is a ladder going all the way down and when it ends, there is a passageway that comes out at the lake. But don't tell your father I said so." she whispered, making her daughter giggle all the harder.  
"Mom! You did stuff against the rules when you were at school?" she asked, amazed at her usually well behaved mother. She stifled the giggles as she pictured her mom sneaking out of an academy to go hang out with her dad. It was a priceless image.  
"Rules are not set in stone, Tamara. It's okay to break a few rules sometimes if it's for a good purpose and if it doesn't hurt anyone."  
"Did Dad break a lot of rules too?" the ten year old asked. She had managed to stop giggling, but was grinning widely, as if any joke would throw her into fits of laughter. Lucrezia smiled at her little daughter.  
"Sweetie, he did things I can't even tell you about until you're 30." Sure enough, Tamara started laughing at the comment. Zechs popped his head back in to see what the commotion was, only to find his wife and daughter laughing until their sides ached. Not knowing the joke, he began to laugh as well, joining in the merriment of the Peacecraft household. How things had changed! The Preventer agent could barely believe how much everything had changed in the years that they had been a family. Relationships had gotten stronger, children had grown, and life kept on creeping away. He stole a last glance at his daughter before he left for the kitchen again. When did you grow up? Why do I always remember you as a baby that wouldn't stop crying? I can't wait to see what you will become when you are older. You are my redemption, little Ta'ra. You will be the Peacecraft that will carry on the legacy.  



	7. Chapter Seven

Chapter Seven  
Two years later  
The letter clutched in her hand was ragged, having been folded many times. The pictures, however, were perfectly neat and tidy, with no smudges or finger prints. Tamara read it over again for the billionth time, savoring every word. How she missed her parents and her aunts and uncles! The academy was so lonely, and too far away from the Sanc Kingdom to visit Aunt Relena over the holidays.  
She was still living the life of an outcast. The kids at Victoria were not much better than any of the others. They formed tight groups, and Tamara just didn't belong to any group at all. She would always be the loner, the outsider, the class geek, she decided. They mocked her computer and science skills most of all. One of the boys even told her that girls shouldn't do well in technology and science, and she had almost gotten a detention for fighting with him. Despite his opinion, it was her favorite subjet. For some reason, she loved being a mechanic.  
Machines were friendly and trustworthy. When the class built robots for the first time, Tamara was fascinated. All throughout the process, she insisted on going alone for her project. Her only other option was to work with a person who disliked her, which made progress impossible and daily work unbearable. As she twisted bunches of wires and plugged in equations, however, she found herself wishing that she had a competent partner to help her.  
Now, she was alone in her room with no one to talk to. How could everyone hate her so much. Even though she told herself that the strong did not need friends, whe wished she had one. "And I would tell them everything that's happening. And they could help me in everything and give me advice..." she sighed into the empty air. She slipped the letter and her picture back into their envelope and laid them reverently in her desk. Her latest project lay on her desk. She had devoted herself to making a small moving gundam robot just like the one Duo had given her for Christmas. So far, she had a steel frame that moved around, but did not rememble a gundam in the least. Now, she had the easy task of shaping and painting parts to go with her chibi-Epyon creation. Tamara let the work envelope her concentration.  
Between her books and studies and her building projects, Tamara kept pretty busy. Some other students were partying and joking around. Many were not even prepared for class, but not Tamara. Early on, she had decided to be the best and applied herself as much as she could. She was always in class early, her shoes neatly shined, her shirts crisp and ironed, her hair neatly pulled back with a headband, and all her homework completed. At first glance, she was a teacher's pet, the school overacheiver. But if you got to know her....   
After an hour or so, the dinner bell finally rang, announcing the end of free period. Tamara sighed, not wanting to leave her work on the gundam model. She packed everything away neatly and grabbed some notes to study while she ate. Many people didn't bring their schoolwork to dinner, but Tamara liked to. It wasn't as if she had anyone to talk to...  
The young girl made her way out of her dorm and down the long corridor of the main residence hall. Kids were hurrying past her, chattering with their buddies about weekend plans and such. Tamara still had the desire to be like everyone else, even though she acknowledged that she was different from them. She could always write to her parents or even her aunts and uncles, but there was just a need for a friend her own age. She filed into the line to wait. The wating line was just beginning to get crowded: she was still early enough so that she wouldn't have to wait an incredibly long period of time just to get her dinner. One more advantage of being at home, she thought. A family meal at a table, and conversation about our day and other boring yet polite topics. She was still lost in thought when a voice came from behind her.  
"Excuse me, do you know what's for dinner tonight?" Tamara was so surprised, she spun around to face the person with the voice. A boy was standing behind her, looking shy and nervous with a pile of books clutched tightly in his hands. His brown hair was in a rugged disarray and fell across his forehead in disarray. In a way, he reminded her a bit of Uncle Heero, but the eyes were different. This boys eyes were a striking green color, eyes that bored right through you. Suddenly, Tamara shook her head.  
"You must be new here," she stated, and he nodded. Then she continued, hurt. "Did someone put you up to this?" Would they never find enough ways to torment her?!  
"No," he replied. "I was just wondering what was on the menu." He had a genuine look on his face and a constant gleam in his eye that Tamara couldn't help but observe. Perhaps he was different, too. Like her? No, that's impossible, Tamara told herself. No one is like me. I am a loner, taking my challenges as they come, not needing anyone's help.  
"I think it's spaghetti tonight. Don't expect too much though. The school's sauce is really terrible. It really makes me miss my mom's cooking." The little girl was surprised at herslef. Usually, she didn't talk that much to her peers, let alone strangers. They walked through the line, neither saying another word to each other. When they reached the seating area, Tamara headed for a place to herself on the end. To her surprise, the boy with green eyes followed her. This made her confused at first. "You don't want to sit here," she warned him.  
"Why not? Do you bite?" he asked, sitting down at the same table. "I'm new here. I could use some company." Then, he pulled out his books. "You'll understand why I didn't want to sit by some of the other students..." Much to her surprise, Tamara felt herself smiling. At last, someone with a little sense.  
"What books did you bring down?" she asked.  
"Just some textbooks on electrical engineering and design plus some sketchbooks."  
"Sketchbooks?! Of what?" He had her interest now. They scooted in closer to look at his books. The boy turned page after page, showing her his drawings and ideas, each having their own explanation. "This one is a mobile suit capable of being mass produced. It really puts the pilot back in control, but still supplies quite a bit of firepower. All I need to do is figure out how to get everything to fire properly." Tamara had the answer, and they talked and talked, both of the them ignoring their dinners.  
"By the way, my name is Calen Vaughn," the boy metioned from out of the blue. He grinned a lopsided grin. "Just in case you need to know. What's your name?"  
"Tamara Victoria Noin," she replied. He nodded, and they looked over at each other, considering what had just happened. The bell rang, and Calen was obliged to leave, as was Tamara. They walked back to their dorms together, promising to get together again the next day at lunch. As she said goodbye to him at the end of the boy's dorm hallway, Tamara had a thought. She had just made her first friend.  



	8. Chapter Eight

Chapter Eight  
The very next day, they met in the cafeteria for lunch break. Calen had brought his sketchbook again, but they ended up talking. "So, who are your parents?" he asked one day, out of the blue. Tamara didn't know how to answer. She had never had to answer a question like that before, and wasn't fully ready to start lying. At last, she decided on something that wouldn't sound too badly.  
"Well, my mom is Lucrezia Noin, she used to be a pilot. I don't really know my dad. We never really think about him." It hurt her to lie, especially about her dad, who was, in Tamara's opinion, the coolest dad a girl could hope to have. Nor did she want to start lying to the first and only friend she had. To her surprise however, Calen was totally understanding.  
"The same Lucrezia Noin that graduated with the second highest honors in the history of Lake Victoria Military Academy?" he asked with awe.  
"Yep. That's my mom," Tamara replied mundanely, not able to think up something else to say. "What about your family? What are they like?"  
Calen's eyes sparkled all the more as he launched into a description of his family. He was the only child, and had a tall blonde haired mother and a tall brown haired father. They had both been involved in the Eve Wars. "My dad was one of the leading engineers for the White Fang. I hope to be an engineer when I grow up too. And my mom was an officer on Battleship Libra. We're from the colonies, you see."  
"So am I! I was born and raised on Mars colony. How about you?"  
"I'm from Colony B1340232. Some people call it "The Realm of the Death Flower," he told her. The last sentence caught her attention, so Calen continued. "The arisze flower is one of the most beautiful flowers anywhere. It grows all alone if you let it, only producing a single blossom. However, if you take good care of it and do some things with the plant, you can get it to produce two blossoms, side by side. It's the strongest flower, and yet, it is the most delicate. All it needs is a little good help, and it becomes a beautiful thing for all to enjoy."  
"That's amazing," Tamara marveled. We don't have anything that cool on Mars colony. We do have these great public parks with all kinds of trees and bushes and flowers and stone fountains. That's probably my favorite part. I remember taking walks in the park when the leaves were falling." She closed her eyes, remembering those joyful days in the park with her father. After playing outside, they would come in and eat frozen meals that Mom had made and frozen. The one time Dad had tried to cook from scratch, he had lit a pot holder on fire and almost burned the house down. She giggled at that memory. Now that she had a friend, she wished she could share that memory with him. But the secret must be kept. It was imperative to her dad's safety. Calen looked at her with his quirky grin, and she grinned back.  
"What's so funny?"  
"Nothing. Just a little memory."  
~  
With each step down the ladder, Tamara's excitement grew. It was finally Friday, and the students had a small break before resuming their studies again. After her last class, geometry, she had hurried to her room and grabbed her backpack. Then, she had rushed to the pipe room and used her favorite secret exit. She finally reached the bottom and made her way through the dark corridor that led out to the lake and the small forest.  
At last, she stepped out into the sunshine. It was a bright day, with the trees adorned in vibrant shades of orange, red, yellow, and brown. From her vantage point, she could see Calen waiting for her beneath their tree at the edge of the lake. She had been waiting for this day all week. Trying to keep herself from looking too excited, she slowed her gait. Her friend finally noticed her, glancing up from the papers spread across the ground. "Nice day, isn't it?" Calen said, greeting her. "No wind. We don't have to chase our blueprints around the lake today." Tamara smiled and dropped her backpack to the ground. She emptied out the contents, and Calen's eyes lit up. "I see you put the finishing touches on the heat rod for your chibi-Epyon."  
"Yeah. I finally got it to work. I've got all my calculations right here. It took me hours to get the first segment, but getting the rest of them went more quickly. It's not as easy as it looks," Tamara answered. She showed her friend the weapon for the tiny gundam model. Her little Epyon worked fully, and was neatly painted and accesorized. She also grabbed out her blueprints for a very large mobile suit. "Triton gundam is coming along well, too. I just got the trident worked out. Guess I'm in a weapons craze this month."  
The two of them compared blueprints for two different mobile suits. Calen had designed a stealthy, defensive gundam complete with a double beam saber, cloaking shield and a huge blaster cannon. Aptly named Swiftstrike, he had spent hours on the design, as Tamara had on her gundam. The project had kind of started itself when the two students had begun to fool around with Tamara's chibi-Epyon robot. Before long, they were making improvements on the design. At last, they began to take on the challenge of making their own gundam. Sadly, Tamara knew that such a weapon might one day be needed.  
In all her 14 years of life, she had never been as worried as she was now. There was a small group of militarists in the political system, her Aunt Relena said. They thirsted for political power and an establishment of troops. Tamara could only imagine her parent's reactions, especially her father. Peace was the most important thing to them, besides family. In their last letter, they had been nervous about her safety. Tamara felt relativley safe at Lake Victoria. It was just a civilian academy, not a military target. And she wanted to stay there, not be whisked away to some far away place where she had no one to talk to. After all, she finally had a friend.  
After a heated weapons debate, the boy decided to put away the battle plans. "Tamara, have you ever thought about war? What would happen to us if the militarists acted?" His face was thoughtfull, and Tamara was puzzled at his question.  
"I don't know, really. This school might go back to being a training center. Mom might go back to teaching and piloting. That would be a big change. I guess my whole life would change if war came back. My mom always said that she wondered why so many people had to die..."  
"Do you ever wonder who your dad was?"  
"What?!" Tamara shot back incredulously. "Calen, where did you get that comment from?" The brown haired boy across from her shook his head.  
"I don't know. I was just wondering some things. I was thinking about my dad, and how he died because he worked for White Fang. I wonder who your dad was and which side he worked for," he replied. "He could be Commander Milliardo Peacecraft or Trieze Khushrenada for all you know." Tamara flinched, knowing that she would have to say something to that. But what could she say? The last thing she wanted to do was lie to her only friend...  
"I really don't want to ask my mom about anything, Calen. I think my dad's death really hurt her, and we've never talked about it. It's way to painful for her."  
"Tamara, as a friend to a friend, I think you should find out more about your dad. You have a right to know. Your mom probably needs to get rid of her regrets too. She's been holding stuff back from you for more than 14 years, don't you think she owes you an explanation?"  
"Who are you now a psychiatrist?" She tried to loosen up the mood, but Calen was not going to be deterred. He was a great friend, always caring and considerate, always there for her when she needed to talk. It had been a hard task keeping the secret from him, because there were so many things about her that had to do with her father. It was as if she had to hide a whole different life from him. Tamara looked over at him with her friendly grin as she gathered up her papers and scrap pieces of mechanical devices. "I really should go. We have that big test tomorrow for our physics class, and I really need to do some solo studying." She stood awkwardly, clutching the bag tightly as she tried to escape the delicate conversation.  
Calen's smile ceased to be pleasant and happy, instead becoming a concerned expression. He watched his only friend turn and walk back to the dormitories. Something was wrong with her. And his senses told him that it had something to do with her father. He had lost his own father before he got the chance to know him, but at least he knew who his father was. He had to help her...  



	9. Chapter Nine

Chapter Nine  
Lake Victoria Academy was festive around Christmas, with poinsettas and holly everywhere. The students had a two week long break from classes, in which some of them went home to their families and others stayed. Tamara's parents were out on a mission, and so she had to stay at theacademy that year, but that was no big deal. Calen was staying too, and she would have time to work on their gundams. Her aunt Relena talked about coming down and taking her for the last week of vacation, and Tamara was glad to go. Heero had promised her a lesson in computer hacking, saying that it was a necessary school skill. It was good to be the baby of the family, she had decided.  
Christmas was usually her favorite holiday. On Mars, there had been simulated snow, which was always nice to play in. When her mom was home with her, they would make snow forts and have a snowball war. Or else they would launch a sneak attack on Dad. She laughed at the memories of Christmases gone by. This would be another to add to her memories. Especially since she got Calen's present done!  
It would be the best present ever. So far as she knew, he had no clue what it was. He had been guessing at it all week, as had she been guessing at her present. Tamara couldn't think of anything that he would get her that she hadn't already asked about. It wasn't anything mechanical and it wasn't a book. That puzzled her beyond belief. She couldn't think of anything that he would get her that wasn't one of those things. He knew her better than to get her something girly like perfume or jewelry, didn't he?  
Most of the other girls at the academy had changed drastically. They become even more confined to groups, and often talked about cute boys or popular music. It seemed as if their brains had left them for a few years, with the promise of returning later. Tamara couldn't understand. They loved to torment her about being friends with Calen. As she walked down the hall, Maori Rhodes yelled at her, "Hey geek! Where's your boyfriend!" Tamara's fiery temper almost flared up, but the twelve year old kept her anger inside. Couldn't she have a friend of the opposite gender? Why did there have to be so many rules and judgements?  
At last, she found her way to her dorm room. She pushed inside, but quickly felt that something was wrong. There was someone in the room, watching her. Suddenly, from out of nowhere, someone jumped out from behind her. Tamara gasped to keep from screaming and whirled in a kick that she had learned from the physical education teacher. The intruder ducked the kick and started laughing. It was Calen! He laughed until his isdes started to hurt, while Tamara truly became angry. "Why did you do that? I could have hurt you!"  
"Not with a kick like that you wouldn't have," he teased back, still laughing.  
"Calen, you know better than to sneak up on me. What did you want?" she asked impatiently, crossign over to her bed and sitting down. Calen stooped to pick up is backpack that he kept the gundam plans in and followed her.  
"I just wanted to give you your present. It is Christmas Day, you know. I couldn't wait to see the look on your face when you see it," he told her, looking excited. She frowned. What was it? Please don't let it be something girly. No necklaces or smelly sprays or cutesy beaded bracelets. She hesitated, dreading what he would pull from the bag.  
"Why don't we go out to the lake and exchange presents. I think it's still light out, and it's a lot nicer out there than it is in here," the twelve year old suggested. Her companion nodded, and they snuck out of the dorm and down to their favorite spot at the lake. It was still a bit warm out and the sun was wavering on the horizon as if it could not decide whether to set or stay in the world above. The two teens sat down with hteir respective bookbags and faced each other. Tamara pulled her wrapped parcel out first. "Here, open it. I want to know what you think of it."  
She handed it to Calen, who dug into the wrapping nervously. He finally pulled out a tiny model of Swiftstrike gundam, scaled down to a 120th of the original size. It had all it's weapons and accesories, including a tiny beam cannon that shot beams of green light. He marveled at the details. "I called my uncle Duo to get the parts. And I stole your blueprints and copied them. You thought you had left them down at the lake, but I really had them. Do you like it?"  
"Yeah! I wasn't expecting something like this. This took a lot of time and effort."  
"I'm glad you like it. Maybe Chibi Epyon and Chibi Swiftstrike can do battle sometime?"  
"Perhaps. Now open up my present." Calen dug through his backpack, searching for his present. He pulled out a very flat parcel wrapped in homemade paper as well as a bigger box. "Open this one first," he said, handing her the big box. Tamara smiled at he patterns and drawings of her, gundams, and the arisze flower that covered it. Inside the paper was a pair of flight goggles. The girl ran her hand over the smooth metal surface, amazed at the intricate patterns around the edges. There were input/output plug-ins for mobile suit systems and glass plated lenses to see out of. It was magnificent.  
"Wow! I can't believe this! It is so neat. Maybe I can use it if I ever build Triton!"  
"I was hoping you would like them. I got you something else to," Calen replied, handing her the long thin package.  
She carefully undid the wrapping paper and slid out a big manilla envelope. At the strange look on her face, Calen began to explain. "I didn't get you something normal. I wanted to get you something special, since your such a great friend. I know you'll like this." She opened the envelope and took the papers out and couldn't bleieve what she saw.  
"You have a father," he said to her simply. "Milliardo Peacecraft. He was the leader of White Fang, Tamara! And a prince of the Sanc Kingdom! Do you know what that means? You are related by blood to Relena Peacecraft!" Tamara's eyes went wide as she looked over the paper. There were DNA tests, documents, and pictures. Pictures of her dad in a military uniform on Libra, pictures from his yearbook, pictures of her mom and dad together. A few she had seen before, but somehow they were different now.  
"H..h..how?"  
"Well, I kind of borrowed some saliva from cans and bottles for your DNA. I had it tested, then I hacked into a DNA database for the old OZ organization, since I knew your mom was with OZ. I searched for matches, and sure enough, a match for Zechs Merquise came up. I researched him, only to find that not only was he also Milliardo Peacecraft, but he was your mom's best friend in school. And there's more. Your DNA results say that you're not the age you think you are. You're not fifteen, Tamara. You're fourteen. That means that your dad couldn't have died when Libra exploded. That means he's alive somewhere!"  
To the boy's surprise, Tamara began to cry. He was scared at first, because she never cried, even when things weren't going well. "What's wrong? I know it's tough. learning all of this at once, but you have a right to know."  
"Calen," she managed through the tears that were flowing freely now, " there's something I need to tell you. Something I've been wanting to tell you for two years." His face looked concerned, and he handed her a tissue to dry her tears.  
"Tell me."  
"You know who Dad is now, and that he's alive, so it can't hurt to tell you this now," she began. "I've known my dad all my life. He's a Preventer, a government agent and so is my mom. He's supposed to be dead, otherwise he wouldn't be able to do the things he can do. It's been a secret for years, one I had to keep. There were so many memories that I wanted to tell you about, so many things that I couldn't explain because of the secret. I'm sorry." Calen was silent, his jaw dropped. Tamara continued.  
"Thank you so much for your gift. I guess the best part about it is the thought that went into it. And now I don't have to hide a whole part of my life."  
Calen managed to give his friend a lopsided grin. "I guess we both got a Christmas present, then."  
  
What do you think? Should I write more? What will happen to Tamara and Calen? Please give me comments and criticism. Your reviews are much appreciated.  



	10. Chapter Ten

Chapter Ten  
Tamara waited in her room eagerly. Only one a little more time to go before she could go to the library to work on the design of Triton Gundam. She and Calen had agreed to meet there that night, when there wouldn't be any students to disturb them. The plans were mostly completed, and all they had left to do was some final sketches and details. What they would do with the plans after that, they did not know yet.  
She put her backpack with all her plans designs, and personal stuff on her back. When would it be time to go? To kill time, the fourteen-year old paced over to her calendar. She marked through the date, December 27, AC 211. Only four more days until she would go to the Sanc Kingdom. It would be so wonderful to get out and visit her family again. She had been in school so long, she had almost forgotten what it was like to live with family. There were so many things that she missed, like the big family Christmas parties on L-4 at Quatre's house, visiting Duo and Hilde at their junkyard, and having Heero teach her all the things that her father refused to let her know.  
For a while, she was lost in the memories. Ultimately, she came back to the real world. It was nine o'clock already, and the library would be closing soon. That was no problem for her. Almost every uncle she had taught her how to pick locks. That was the wonderful thing about uncles. They would teach you the things your father wouldn't teach you. Cool things like hacking, lock picking and martial arts. It was somewhat helpful having five uncles who were ex-gundam pilots. Tamara committed her time to searching for a small thin object with which to pick the lock. That's when the boom rocked the building.  
Tamara was thrown to the ground by the initial blast. Her mind began to reel wildly. What was going on? The building shook again. The explosions were getting closer. Something was definitely wrong. This was not an accidental explosion. This was an attack. The feeling was familiar. It reminded her of the time a rebel group had attacked her old school, when she got her scars. Now, the girl was truly terrified.  
There was another blast, followed by yet another. Her thoughts raced to Calen. He was in the dormitory wing next to hers. Had it been hit? Would it be safe to go and see? After hasty consideration, Tamara determined that she should stay in the room. It was far to dangerous to go wandering around. She clenched her fists in anger and worry. Who would be attacking a school? It was for civilians, not military cadets.  
Another blast hit, this one more intense than all the others combined. The ceiling began to cave in, and the fourteen year old hastily took cover beneath her desk. She could feel the heat of the blast, and the smoke of something burning. Rubble was falling everywhere, chunks of stone pounding on the top of her desk. The debris began to pile up in front of her, starting to trap her in. Her heart began to pound wildly with fright. The heat got worse, as did the smell of the horrid smoke. And somewhere out there was her best friend... Tamara kept her fists clenched as she tried to protect her face and head with her arms. The wall behind her creaked, and she could only pray that it would not topple down on top of her. She did not know how long she stayed under the desk, curled in the fetal position. She did not dare to look down at her watch, not wanting to know. All she knew was the fear.  
The stones blocked her only escape, and she could tell that the fire of destruction was creeping closer. Frantically, Tamara began to dig. Pushing and kicking, she fought to free herself from beneath the stone and steel. Her backpack still on, she finally pulled herself to the surface. Fire raged everywhere, making the air wave and flicker with the heat. Rubble was scattered across the ground, a burnt bed or chair lying in the pitiful ruins. Some of the walls were completely blown apart and were smoldering. The landscape was a mix of stone, and twisted metal. She could smell the gas form the broken pipes. There was no sign of human life anywhere. She stood up fully, taking in the apocalyptic scene. So this was war.  
Tamara took off, running for Calen's dormitory. Flame roared behind her, and she knew it would eventually consume her quarters. But right now, all that mattered was getting to Calen. He was her only friend, one she didn't want to lose. The debris proved an effective barrier, but the girl avoided obstacles, making her way to wing B of the dormitories at Lake Victoria Civilian Academy. At last, she found the spot where rows of neat and tidy rooms used to stand. There was a large crater where a beam cannon had hit it's mark. Everything around it had been blown apart. She counted her steps trying to find Calen's room.  
"Ta'ra," she heard someone call. Frantically, she glanced around for the faint voice. "Arisze." She looked again, following the voice. It was Calen, it had to be Calen! At last, she found him, buried beneath a pile of rubble. His eyes were half closed, and she could see that his head was bleeding. She pulled off her blue green sweater that she had on over her blouse and began to make bandages for his wounds.  
"You're going to be all right. I'm going to go get a doctor," she told him. The cuts, gashes and bruises were horrific, and once she bandaged his head, she began to dig him out of the rubble. He still had his backpack full of things clutched in his hand. His body looked as if it had been completely crushed under the wreckage, and Tamara didn't know what to do about it. Bandages couldn't help wounds like those.  
"Ta'ra, listen to me," he began in a weak, scratchy voice. He began to cough a dry racking cough that made him convulse, coughing up blood. Tamara's eyes widened. Calen was in true danger. He regained his voice slowly and continued. "I want you to take this stuff for me." He motioned towards his bag as best he could. Then, he gave her a small, sad smile. "Thank you."  
Tamara gulped and asked, "Thank you for what?  
"For trusting me. For being my friend. For everything," he answered weakly. He began to cough again, and there was nothing she could do for him but watch. Tamara couldn't take it anymore.  
"I'm sorry for the secrets, Calen. And I'm sorry that I never believed in your dreams. But you can't go. I'm only half a person. We're a team, remember?"  
He listened, not acknowledging her statement. Then, he strained to grab his backpack. His bloody fingers curled around it, holding on to it for dear life. Tamara held onto his hand as tightly as she could without hurting him, as if she could hold him in the mortal world. "Ta'ra, listen to me," he pleaded. "There are some seeds in there that I want you to grow. The arisze. It makes me think of you every time I see it. It stands all alone, usually only producing a single blossom. It is known as the flower of death, but it is the most wonderful flower of them all. If you take the time to pick it, it has the sweetest fragrance of all..." Tamara felt her tears well up behind her eyes. She refused to let them seep out, though. To cry was to admit defeat.  
Calen's eyes closed, and she could feel his hand go limp. He settled back, leaning against her knees. She heard him breathe out with a deep sigh almost. "Arisze..." And it was then that it occurred to her that he was saying his good-byes. Reverently, she took the bag and stood. And then she turned and ran from the destroyed dormitory. She ran without looking back, not caring that tears were streaming down her face. She ran, hoping that her heart would not catch up with her.  
  
Sorry to make you so sad! Please keep reading. This is only the beginning still. Your comments and criticism are always welcome. Gracias!  



	11. Chapter Eleven

Chapter Eleven  
At last, Tamara had gotten past the destruction of the Academy. Her legs throbbed from running, and her lungs ached from the smoke of the fire. The two backpacks were safe and secure, their precious cargo still pristine and untouched, as if the disaster had never happened. The fourteen year-old collapsed against a tree, weary to her bones. The tears had stopped, but her body still racked with bitter sobs. For the third time since she was an infant, she had cried.  
The images came back to her. He was still there before her, underneath the rubble, the makeshift bandages slowly becoming red, the warm flow of blood against her hands. Her mind played the scene over and over, not letting her forget. "Calen," she sighed. "I'm so sorry. For the secrets, for my doubts, for everything. You had such wonderful dreams, and I was only looking for challenges. You were so genuine, and I was so skeptical. Forgive me. I am not worthy of your friendship." She looked down at the bag, a glint of silver catching her eye. Tamara pulled out the mask he had given her two days ago. "I swear that I will make whoever did this pay. Arisze will avenge you, friend." She slipped the mask on, accustoming herself to the feel of the cold steel. "The deathflower will strike. and your dream will become a reality. Swiftstrike will rise up and rid the world of those who harm innocents. I swear it."  
She took the mask off and laid it carefully back in her bag. She sat there for a few hours, mumbling to herself. Then, she heard footsteps coming up behind her. Startled, she leapt up, ready to fight whoever was coming. The adrenaline was pumping through her system wildly, anticipating the enemy. Her brain was racing. The object popped up from around the corner. The shape was tall but shadowy and started toward her without a word. Tamara attacked, and managed to knock him to the ground.  
"Kiddo! What was that for? You know, you could try a handshake next time." came the voice. Only one person ever called her kiddo.  
"Uncle Duo?" she managed, coming in closer. The tall man with the long braid picked himself up off the ground and fumbled around for a flashlight. Finally finding it, he clicked it on and shined it in her direction. She could see that he was wearing a Preventer jacket not unlike the one her dad wore on weekends. His badge read "Preventer Special Operative Shinigami," and he had a pained look on his face.  
"I think you need to spend more time with Sally and less time with Wufei when your folks take you to the office," he told her lightly, rubbing his side.  
"I learned that from Sally," she told him, almost smiling.  
"Sorry to scare you. What are you doing out here?"  
"Something happened.. at Victoria," she answered, her wavering voice trailing off uncertainly.  
"Are you okay? That was a serious blast over there," he asked. She nodded, and he looked at her with a concerned look on his face. "You'd better come with me. If I know Zechs, he's probably having a heart attack right now." Tamara followed him, still reeling a little bit, but feeling better already. Duo always seemed to have that effect on her. It was quiet for a while, with just the two of them heading for what Duo said was a rendezvous point, where several Preventer special operatives were meeting.  
"What happened at the academy?" she finally asked, breaking the silence. Duo bowed his head.  
"I probably should say this, but you'll probably find out anyway. There is a group of militarists that have been vying for power for some time. They feel that there is no room for peace on Earth or space. They wanted to use Lake Victoria to train their own military students. The people at Victoria obviously said no. So they decided to trash the place, just to show they could." The hatred in his voice was surprising. Tamara had never heard him talk like this. It was as if the joking Uncle Duo that she had always known had melted away. So this was how war changed people...  
The two of them finally reached a small house in the middle of nowhere. Duo knocked on the door in a pattern Tamara did not recognize. The door creaked open slightly, and Duo showed his ID. Then, the door opened fully. He and Tamara stepped in to the makeshift base. "Hey, everybody," Duo greeted. "Look who I found out by her lonesome." Quatre, Trowa, Wufei, and Heero were circled around a table, looking very serious.  
"Tamara! What are you doing here?" Quatre exclaimed.  
"She decided to go for a little jog before the fireworks went off," Duo told them, taking a seat. Heero raised one eyebrow in a skeptical look.  
"Why did you leave the academy? There have been people looking for you." His monotone vice was chilling, and Tamara gulped.  
"There are things back there..." she began. But she couldn't finish. Her throat seemed to swell up and she was completely tongue tied. She kept trying to say something, anything, but nothing would come out. Besides, how could she tell them what had happened?  
"She'll be ready to talk in time. Right now she just needs some time to rest." Trowa said quietly in his soft yet forceful voice. They all nodded, assessing what to do with the girl in the cabin.  
"I sure she could use some rest. I think there's a couch in the next room," Quatre suggested. Tamara closed her eyes briefly, thinking of how nice it would be to fall asleep. She was thoroughly exhausted after the evening's unexpected events. Quatre led her to the living room of the small cabin. She curled up on the couch, letting the bags lean against the legs of the old couch. "Try to get some sleep. You'll feel better tomorrow. We'll get you home as soon as possible," he reassured, turning out the living room lights as he left. Tamara let out a little sigh, and shut her eyes. Before she knew it, she was asleep.  
Meanwhile, serious matters were taking place in the board room. All five ex-pilots were gathered around Heero's laptop. Duo sent a message to the Peacecrafts to let them know Tamara was okay. "It must have been a tough sight to see," Quatre said. "All that destruction and death. She was lucky to get out."  
"I had almost forgotten how bad war could really be," Trowa remarked. "It's a pity when innocent civilians get involved. War should be limited to the soldiers. Those kids never asked to be in a war."  
What I want to know," Heero remarked, "is how they got all those mobile suits without Preventer catching on. The Earth Sphere Unified Nation got rid of all weapons and arms after Mariemaia's rebellion. I wonder where they got the titanium alloy."  
"It wouldn't be hard for Darren Octera. He has the money to pay off several henchmen to secure a resource satellite," Wufei interjected. "If there's trouble, you can bet Octera is behind it. His militarist campaign has been causing trouble for years." Duo finished up on the computer and turned to the others. His face was surprised, and he motioned for the others to come and look at the screen.  
"Guys! Relena is making a statement!" he told them, his eyes fixed on the screen. He turned up the volume, and five sets of eyes became glued to the screen. On the monitor, they could see Relena in her neat and perfectly pressed suit, looking as if the weight of the world were on her shoulders. She looked out as if she were pleading to all the people of Earth, and one could tell that she was tired and upset.  
"Good morning. As you may know, I am Vice Foreign Minister Relena Peacecraft-Darlian. Late last night, at approximately nine o'clock East African time and eight o'clock Sanc Kingdom time, a new prototype of military suit attacked the Lake Victoria Civilian Academy. The attack is not just a terrorist attack. It is a purposeful affront on the ideals of pacifism and the Earth Sphere Unified Nation. We have reason to believe that there is a highly organized federation of people in the government who wish to implement war on Earth and the colonies. It is the decision of the ESUN Congress to withdrawal from this union with these militarists. It is not my decision, but the decision of the people to do this. As of now, the Sanc Kingdom Alliance will welcome any countries that have a sincere wish for peace. However, we will not tolerate the actions of militaristic nations who wish to cause harm to innocent civilians. I hope that we can resolve this conflict through diplomatic negotiations. I will hold another press conference this morning at seven o'clock, when I will have more details on this development. Thank you." Cameras flashed, and the reporters were bursting with questions.  
In the cabin, there were five very surprised Preventers. No one bothered to speak, they just stared at the screen. Heero was stunned. What was the ESUN Congress thinking? They had obviously gone against Relena's advice, judging from her demeanor. Were they setting her up to take the fall if things went wrong? Whatever it was, it was not good....  



	12. Chapter Twelve

Chapter Twelve  
"How's it coming?" Trayan yelled up to Tamara. The fifteen year old couldn't hear him from where she was. The cockpit of Triton was almost finished. All it needed were pads for the buttons and a few extra touches and it would be set. She pressed the last one on and glanced around. The cockpit was nice, complete with screens, gauges, and wires connecting to the pilot's goggles which interpreted battle data. Her new system was working perfectly. It was almost ready for a test drive.  
She had been working on the gundam for the past year. Tensions had increased to a breaking point on Earth. Fierce territorial debate threatened to break out in all out war. Queen Relena was fighting with the Congress, and there were rumors that either one or the other would be taken out. It looked as if Earth was ready to tear itself apart. In space, however, Earth Sphere Divided was almost done with Project Mason. Tamara, along with an adviser, had worked out final plans for Triton and Swiftstrike. It had taken her a long time to decide to use her original plans instead of getting new ones. However, she considered it part of her revenge for Calen, to build his gundam. And besides, she had promised him that she would build it. And she would pilot it herself. Triton did not hold the meaning for her that Swiftstrike did, and she made it clear that she intended to pilot the gundam. Trayan accepted this, and made sure that this was approved.  
ESD was a truly small organization. It was made up of one man from the Alliance Congress, a rebel from the Federation, Trayan, an engineer, a mechanic, and herself. The engineer and the mechanic were only in the agency temporarily, so once the gundams were built it would be a four person organization. Not a large number considering who they had to oppose. The Federation had built themselves an army of Leos and Tauruses on old blueprints. What ESD lacked in numbers, however, they gained in equipment and pilot skill. Both teens had practiced extensively with Tauruses stolen from a Federation base. Tamara had quickly gotten the hang of the suit, and by now it was like a limb on her body.  
She made the finishing touches and floated back down to the deck of the ship they were working on. Trayan was waiting for her patiently at the bottom, along with the Congressman. "So this is what you have done with the funding," he remarked. "Quite impressive." All three looked up at the two majestic gundams standing side by side. Tamara felt a wave of emotion come over her. Standing before her was her dream, her promise. It was her past and her future. She felt a bit weak and excused herself. Memories of a warm December night in Africa flooded back to her. She could see his blood staining the rubble, his eyes closing the last time, the way he just seemed to slip away. She almost shed a tear as she remembered that night, the night she had lost her best friend. She didn't bother to glance at her watch for the date. She knew. It was December 27th.  
*  
The first day on the battlefield came more quickly than either she or Trayan had expected. They had received word that the plane carrying the congressman and the Federation rebel had been destroyed by the 8th Taurus division of the Federation. The news was startling, because it meant that ESD was down to two agents and two gundams. Trayan was the first to find out, and quickly alerted his fellow pilot. Tamara had trouble getting out of the house for a while, but eventually managed to convince her parents that she needed to go to a library and study. Once she was a block away, she took off or the Mars ESD headquarters.  
When she arrived, he found Trayan already in Triton, ready to go to Earth. She grinned and ascended to Swiftwtrike's pilot seat. They had both been on test flights before, but nothing like a real battle. Tamara sat down in the pilots chair and adjusted the straps on the seat. Adjusting her silver mask that she got on that fateful Christmas, she was ready to go. She plugged in the wires from the cockpit into the input/output holes in her mask. Information flooded her brain as the Zero System began to work it's magic. She was ready to go.  
Both gundams jetted out of the hangar, heading up through the atmosphere. Inside her cockpit, Tamara prayed that her parents wouldn't find out about this. Ever since they had a discussion with Relena about succession and the Peacecraft throne, they had been adamant about making sure she knew the importance of pacifism and politics. She almost found it humorous. Here she was, the heir to the Sanc Kingdom, going to fight a battle.  
Swiftstrike cloaked itself and slipped out. She made final checks on the system as she made her way to Earth. She could see the stars sparkle in the distance and the luminous moon. It wouldn't be long now, and she would be taking her revenge for her best friend's death. It had been the Federation that had massacred so many innocent people, the Federation that had destroyed the peace of the Earth Sphere. Now, they would pay.  
She entered Earth's atmosphere right behind Trayan. The gundam shook a bit as it passed through, but finally broke out of the atmospheric barrier and onto the planet. They were directly over the Federation base at New Edwards, and Tamara could see the 8th Taurus division. They were making their way to an airport. She plugged in numbers and codes on her panel, and soon she had intercepted the enemy transmission. "This is Major Garrett, T 852. We have confirmed that the defector is taken care of," came the voice over the intercom. She beamed the transmission to Triton gundam so Trayan could listen as well.  
"He was with Congressman Jael. They were both carrying badges that identified them as Earth Sphere Divided agents. Apparently, it is an agency created to oppose us. Commander Octera will not be happy," came a second voice that was identified as T-856.  
"Have you contacted him yet?"  
"No. I want to wait until I can get a hold of good recording equipment. These old pieces of junk are barely able to transmit a vid-phone image." Tamara smiled. Theses men would not make it to their base. Octera couldn't find out about ESD. She got Trayan on the vid-phone system between their gundams. He agreed with her plan for a short, quick attack. Now, the fray would begin.  
Tamara cloaked her gundam and drew her double beam saber. She stalked up behind the unit of Taurus suits. In a flash, she appeared out of nowhere and jammed her saber through the midsection of Taurus 856. Stepping back, she cloaked again and reappeared next to another. Ripping through it, she kept on darting and attacking. Trayan entered the fray with his machine guns and trident. "It's a gundam!" someone shrieked, but their cry was soon silenced. There were around 50 mobile suits in all, and they were relentless in their attacks. Tamara moved through the sea of metal, jabbing, blasting, and wreaking havoc. She worked to jam all communications while Trayan covered her. They could not run the risk of anyone giving the news to Octera.  
Swiftstrike lived up to its name, appearing, striking and disappearing just as quickly as it had come. Everything went perfectly. The destruction didn't bother Tamara. Zero system was pushing her to destroy the enemy. It was as if her brain was on auto-pilot, her hands guiding the suit and it's gigantic double beam saber. She was glad Calen had designed it with such agility. Triton was not as quick, but had more brute strength. Between the two gundams, a few Taurus suits were no problem.  
Before she knew it, they were jetting away from the battlefield and back to space. She cloaked her gundam and dodged anti-aircraft fire as she zoomed away. Tamara began to laugh as she watched the Earth get smaller and smaller. The Federation would soon learn that the Deathflower would have her revenge.   
  
Like it? Love it? Hate it? Send me you reviews please! Make a lonely author happy and review. This is not the end, so get ready for more chapters of adventure, angst, and lots of fun!  



	13. Chapter Thirteen

Chapter Thirteen  
  
There were numerous missions for the two ESD agents. Octera found out about the gundams eventually, and caused a great deal of uproar. He challenged the pacifists and threatened the gundams. But there was nothing that he could do to them. He could talk and threaten, but he had no weapons. The Alliance would prevail, and the Federation was in danger. Tamara found that she was happy again. Being on the battlefield made her happier than she had ever been. It challenged her, and she loved challenges. She had been able to put Calen's loss behind her, and was ready to move on with her life. Her parents were allowing her to study privately, so she could spend more time at ESD.  
  
On Earth, Relena was preparing her speech for the day. Today was the day that she was going to the old embassy in America to give a speech on the principles and ideals of the Alliance. It seemed like she was always on the run somewhere.... She glanced out her hotel window. In the distance was an old military base. Her brother had warned her about militarists near New Edwards, but Relena had no problems. They couldn't use mobile suits without getting shot down. Lady Une had arranged for massive security measures to be taken.  
  
She looked down at her desk in dismay. It was completely covered in papers and books, a depressing sight. Relena glanced out her window at the outdoor pool. It looked so tempting, the water gently rippling in the warm breeze. The 32 year old Queen felt a little guilty about how little time she had. She hadn't had the time to visit her brother and his family, she didn't have the time to even go out for dinner anymore. She made a mental note to make reservations at the Mama Risante's Italian Restaurant in the Sanc Kingdom when she got back.  
  
She gathered her papers and her speech and packed them neatly in her briefcase. Checking her watch, Relena snapped the briefcase shut. She paused in front of the mirror, looking skeptically at her attire. The long white dress was cumbersome, and she missed being able to wear a simple suit. Her hair was perfectly arranged in it's upsweep, the crown of the Sanc Kingdom sitting perfectly on her head. Symbolism was still as important as it was seventeen years ago. The white was a symbol of peace, the crown was a symbol of the monarchy, which in turn stood for peace. Wouldn't it terrify them all if she dressed in blood red like the Federation? She smiled to think of the looks on the faces of the senators at the Sanc Kingdom Alliance Congress.  
  
There was an escort waiting outside for her. The Preventers had arranged for top security on this trip; her brother had made sure of it. Relena made her way to the waiting limousine thinking about how nice it would be to simply drive her own car somewhere for once. Perhaps she should have herself "kidnapped" for a while, just to have a little fun. It would be so interesting to see everyone's reactions, especially her brother's. Milliardo tended to be overprotective.  
  
She got in, only to find Sally Po waiting for her. "Good morning, Relena."  
  
"Good morning, Sally. Are you the official Preventer bodyguard sent to 'protect' me?"  
  
"Afraid so. There's been a lot of militarist activity around here and you know how your brother gets. Lady Une seemed worried too."  
  
"I'm not worried about it. You guys seem to forget that I'm not a little girl anymore. Tell Milliardo that I'm fully capable of fending for myself," she countered angrily.  
  
"Why don't you tell him yourself? He brought Noin and Tamara with him down to the Sanc Kingdom for a week," the older woman told her. Relena's small smile widened.  
  
"You mean he's finally taken a vacation? Whatever happened to his 'all work no fun' motto?" she asked incredulously.  
  
"Noin told me that she was sick of never going on vacation, so they had a 'friendly discussion' about going on a vacation." The laugh that Relena had been suppressing burst out.  
  
"I've heard about Noin's 'friendly discussions'. Poor Milliardo!" she giggled. The thought of her brother getting chewed out by his wife again was really quite humorous. They were both workaholics, and Tamara wasn't much better. She was getting so serious and grown up, not a little girl anymore. She sighed, thinking about her niece. She had never gotten the chance to go see her on Mars, and Heero had been rather upset that she hadn't come to visit. She had joked with him, teasing that the only thing he was upset about was the fact that he wouldn't get to spend time with someone who loved computers as much as he did. It was rather funny, the way that all of the former pilots had adopted Tamara.  
  
The car stopped in front of the embassy, and the two women were greeted be the press. They fought to get closer to the walk, yelling questions at the Queen, hoping to get an answer. Relena's smile faded into a slight scowl as she made her way to the door at the embassy. Would the press never leave her alone? Sally followed her, a radio in hand. The Preventers were prepared. There were metal detectors installed at every door and guards stationed all over the embassy.  
  
The young Queen finally pushed her way into the old building. There were more reporters inside, and they had to get through them as well. At last, she found her way to a small room behind the stage. Sally left her there, going to some secret place to watch over her. Relena shut the door behind her and took out her papers and rearranged them to kill time. She practically had her speech memorized by now. It was the same thing everytime. At first, she had only said what the people wanted to hear. The Congress was very determined to make sure the people supported complete pacifism. Relena found this approach futile. Secretly, she was glad that there were gundams out there.  
  
The gundam matter had been largely debated in Congress. No one quite knew what to think of them. One minute, they were fighting the Federation, and the next minute, they were doing something that directly went against the ideals and plans of the Sanc Kingdom Alliance. The Queen had no official position, but she admired whoever piloted the gundams. At least someone had the strength to stand up to the Federation and injustice. She wondered if Heero would ever do as he said he would and rebuild Wing Zero. That would be a great deal of fun. They were all so much older than they had been when they had been princesses and pilots.  
  
"Queen Relena? Are you ready for your speech?" an aide asked politely, entering the little room.  
  
"Yes, I am." He led her out of the little room and down a hallway to the right. It twisted and turned, leading them to the back of the stage. The aide led her in and paused to listen to something on his headphones. Relena stared up at the looming curtain, separating her from the audience. From the noise coming from the other side of the curtain, she had a large crowd today. The aide finally gave her a cue, and she pushed aside the curtain and walked through.  
  
The crowd was indeed large. She strode to the podium, papers in hand. Everyone stood and applauded as she walked on. There was a Congressman introducing her. "And now, Her Serene Highness, Queen Relena Darlian-Peacecraft." He bowed and exited the stage. She gave the audience on of her reassuring politician smiles and looked out at the audience. A man in the upper balcony caught her eye. She looked up towards the domed ceiling, trying to see what had caught her eye. Then, she saw him. Heero Yuy! It was definitely him, there was no mistaking those eyes or that hair. Suddenly, he pulled a gun and pointed it down at her. "I understand, Heero" she said in her mind, bowing her head.   
She turned to face him and look into his eyes when everything happened at once.  
  
Four shots rang out, and a girl with messy platinum blonde hair burst from the door yelling "Get out! It's a trap!" Sally Po leapt nimbly off the first level balcony and began to run toward Relena. The queen was lying on the ground, and did not appear to be conscious, let alone alive. Tamara was also making her way to her aunt. She was a mess, wearing a simple knee length black dress and her black leather boots. Her hair was down, hanging about her like a cloud. On her face, the lines from her mask were etched. Her bangs hung at the sides of her face, revealing her terrible scars from Victoria. At last, she fought her way through the crowd and reached her aunt.  
  
Sally was crouched beside Relena checking for her heartbeat. People were beginning to swarm around the Queen: medics, reporters trying to get a picture, and bodyguards. "She's alive, but barely. Has anyone called an ambulance yet?" she called, taking control of the situation. Tamara could see Wufei making his way from behind the stage. He was carrying a pair of headphones and a radio, which he was screaming into. He handed Sally the headphones and called on the radio for an ambulance. Tamara knelt by her aunt's side, terrified.  
  
"Is she going to be all right?" the girl asked Sally.  
  
"I don't know yet. Right now we need to get her to the hospital. You don't look that great yourself. How did you know that it was a trap?" Sally asked.  
  
"I overheard it," Tamara said angrily. She didn't want to answer questions now, not when she was this upset. Right now, she was ready to destroy anyone and everyone that came across her path. Her fury and her concern were almost equal, each of them wrestling to control her mind. She looked down at Relena, her father's little sister. She was bleeding from wounds in her abdomen, a pool of blood staining the ground. Sally tried desperately to stop the bleeding, trying to staunch the flow of blood. Heero was suddenly behind them. He had a stony look on his face, as if he were trying to hide his emotions again.  
  
The medics finally showed up. They brought in a stretcher and loaded Relena up. They swarmed around her like drones around a queen bee, attaching IV's and oxygen masks. Heero gestured for Tamara to come with him as he watched Sally follow Relena and Wufei rush off to make arrangements with the hospital. "Come with me," he said, in his cold and emotionless voice.  
  
The girl followed him through the halls and to a back parking lot where there were no nosy reporters. They jumped in a black car and sped off, trying to follow the ambulance that was rushing towards the hospital. "You know something, don't you," Heero began. Tamara froze, scared witless. She tried to calm down, knowing he could sense her fear.  
  
"Why do you say that?"  
  
"You burst in, saying that there was a trap. We found a gundam, model 07, outside New Edwards. And knowing you, you would never burst in with your face like that," he stated. Her hands flew to her face, which she had forgotten about. She knocked her bangs back into the side of her face. Then, she attempted to braid her tangled and blood streaked hair, not wanting to answer questions. Heero continued his interrogation.  
  
"Stop me if I'm wrong. You're a gundam pilot," he began. Tamara didn't know what to say, so she settled on nothing. The former gundam pilot continued. "You're involved either directly or indirectly with the assassination plot. And the Federation is running the whole scheme." The young blonde girl considered telling her uncle all of what happened on the battlefield.  
  
"I am a gundam pilot," she began. "But it's only to protect Aunt Relena and the Sanc Kingdom." Her mind raced, trying to think before she spoke. Heero could smell a lie. He had taught her how to tell when people were lying and she could feel him watching her now. "There's this guy, another gundam pilot, he mentioned something about the assassination plot. So I tried to destroy him and rushed here as fast as I could. I was too late, though." Heero nodded, taking in the information.  
  
"How did all this happen? Do your parents know about this?" he asked.  
  
"I have all the information you could ever want, Uncle Heero. But I don't want to answer any questions right now, she replied. The former pilot glared at the girl, not knowing what to think. At least Relena was still alive. There may be hope for her yet, he thought to himself. She won't die so easily.  
  
Outside, Tamara had calmed herself down. However, she was a crazy mix of emotions inside. Her anger was first and foremost. She blamed herself for ever trusting him, for ever believing his lies. He had betrayed her, used her knowledge to further his evil causes. "I will destroy you, Trayan Octera," she promised silently.  
  
*  
  
Heero pulled the car into the hospital and rushed out, leaving Tamara to follow at her own pace. She walked after Heero, thinking about her parents. They were probably worried sick, with her missing and her aunt shot. She would have a lot more explaining to do when she saw them next. The fifteen year old climbed the steps up to the doors and entered the old hospital. She desperately tried to follow Heero, who was weaving his way through the crowd of doctors, nurses, and patients. It seemed like forever before they reached the place that Relena had been taken.  
  
A doctor stopped them outside the operating room. "She's in surgery right now. We don't even know the extent of her injuries yet." Heero nodded solemnly. They paced over to the bench against the wall to wait. Tamara waited nervously for any news of her aunt's condition. The doctors were bustling in and out, not saying anything. The young girl's mind spun with the events of that day.  
  
There had been a mission to take out the beginnings of a rebel group that fanatically supported the Sanc Kingdom. ESD had realized the danger of the violent group and the gundams went out to destroy the new mobile suits they were building. Tamara had slipped in and stolen the blueprints, while Trayan held off a few of the already built suits. She had then come to join him to try to finish off the remaining suits. They dispatched the flimsy mobile suits with ease with their gundams. The little force had almost been destroyed when she had switched on her vid-comm to Trayan's gundam and found that it was not working. She was puzzled and logged onto the gundam's system. With her mechanical knowledge, she overpowered what appeared to be a block on the system and turned on the screen. What she saw amazed her. Trayan was wearing the blood red coat of a Federation officer. He bowed his head and spoke, his voice oddly soft and forceful. "So I guess you found me out, Deathflower. But it's too late for you to do anything about it. You really don't have that many choices. Sooner or later, you will be wiped out by the Alliance Congress, and the Federation will win. Did you really think the gundams were fighting the Federation?"  
"What's going on here, 06?" she had asked angrily, not bothering to use his name.  
  
"You're very intelligent, 07, but I'm surprised you didn't smell the trickery. And my name is Trayan. Trayan Garret Octera." He observed the look on her face. "That's right, Commander Octera was my father. I was raised in the colonies just as you were, the colonies that were treated by the Earth Sphere United Nation as inferior. And now, we will have revenge. The revenge that was never taken for Heero Yuy. Pacifism can never rule Earth fairly. There will always be oppression under the guise of peace. And the Federation's rule will prevent that. And that rule starts today. With the death of Queen Relena Peacecraft." That was when she had fought him. They had battled and battled, with her screaming curses at him as she tried desperately to destroy him. At last, she had gathered her thoughts and pulled out of the battle, speeding to her aunt in the United States to try to warn her.  
  
Tamara came back to the real world when a stretcher bearing her aunt was wheeled out of the room. The doctors began to take her down the hall to the elevator. Heero got up to follow, and Tamara followed close behind. There was one doctor who was curious as to who they were. "Who are you and why are you here?" Heero showed him his Preventer badge.  
  
"I'm a bodyguard assigned by the Alliance. And this is my daughter. She was visiting me when this came up." Tamara thanked Heero silently for not having to explain. It was hard to explain what her relationship to the Queen was without giving away her secret. What could she tell the doctor? No one knew about Tamara's Peacecraft lineage.  
  
The doctor calmed at the sight of the Preventer badge. "The Queen's operation went well. The bullets missed her vital organs, so she should recover eventually. She will need to stay in a hospital for about a week to receive additional treatment. We're flying her to the Sanc Kingdom immediately. She can get the best medical care there." Heero nodded, following them closely. At last, they boarded a helicopter with a medic or two. Tamara was allowed to stay with her aunt, and she took a hold of her aunt's limp hand.  
  
"I'm sorry, Aunt Relena," she whispered when the medics were out of hearing range. "I should have been there sooner. Don't die on me. I don't want any more blood on my hands."  
  
  
  
A new twist in the plot! What will happen when Relena is not able to lead the alliance? What will happen to ESD and the Gundams? Read on to find out. As always, comments and criticisms are welcome and much appreciated. Please make my day and write to me! It's great to know if you like it, hate it, or want to change it. 


	14. Chapteen Fourteen

Chapter Fourteen  
  
The mood in the Sanc Kingdom was one of panic. The Peacecrafts met the helicopter at the hospital, too worried to ask questions. Tamara's mother only raised an eyebrow at her and hurried to help the medics. She had never seen her father so scared before. The normally calm Preventer looked as if he were about to have a breakdown. "The last time he had been like this," thought Noin, "was when I got shot while on a mission. He had been almost paralyzed at first, not knowing what to do or what to say."  
  
They unloaded her off the helicopter, her brother and Heero both clustered near her with Noin and Tamara following close behind. It wasn't long before Sally and Wufei hopped out of the helicopter as well and followed the procession inside. All arrangements had been made and Relena was rolled right into a room. The growing crowd filed in after her, making way for the doctors and nurses bustling in to hook up IV's and monitors. At last, they were done. She still wasn't conscious, but no one wanted to leave her.  
  
"What are we going do?" Zechs fumed. "Is she going to be alright?" Do we even know when she's going to wake up?"  
  
"The doctors say that she's going to be fine in a week or so," Heero said, moving towards Relena's still figure. Zechs stepped in front of him.  
  
"And where were you, Yuy? Convenient how you always seem to show up when danger comes. Like the time you were on L-1? And now this? Give me one good reason why I should let you near her again?"  
  
"Zechs! Stop it right now," Noin cried. "Calm down. It's not Heero's fault."  
  
"What are you going on about on L-1?" Wufei asked. Zechs glared at the brown haired younger man.  
  
"He was on L-1 the day that the school was attacked. He was on a mission there, and happened to be seen and tried to evade the Federation. Yuy jumped through the window of L-1 Premier Institute, causing the mobile suits to follow him there and destroy the compound." The look of anger in his eyes was immeasurable. Tamara let her hand brush the scars on her face. Suddenly, she felt bold.  
  
"As terrible as this is, we can't start blaming each other for stuff in the past. It's not Heero's fault this happened, Dad. If it's anyone's fault, it's mine," she admitted.  
  
"Ready to tell them your little secret?" Heero said solemnly.  
  
"What secret?" Noin asked worriedly.  
  
"I wasn't able to warn Aunt Relena in time to save her. If I hadn't gotten into a stupid fight, I could have reached her in time," she told them dejectedly. She really didn't want to mention what kind of a fight it was.  
  
"How would you know this was going to happen, Tamara?" her father asked, suddenly becoming worried again. "Were you a part of this?"  
  
"Yes," she stammered. "And I didn't even know it. For more than a year. All they did was lead me blindly in the wrong direction... He lied to me..." She felt sick to her bones when she thought about it. Octera had planned everything out perfectly. He now had all he needed to overthrow the Alliance and take over the government. And she had helped him. They were not fighting for peace. They had fought to achieve the federation's goals.  
  
Everyone sat in awe of the girl before them. Her parents were speechless. Zechs found that he had no emotion left. What was he supposed to feel? Angry at his daughter for getting involved with the Federation? Or maybe should be worried for his only blood relative left alive. Or should he be worried for his daughter? There were so many unanswered questions, so many things to worry about. The former pilot sank down into a chair, his head in his hands.  
  
Noin sat down beside him. "I know how you feel, Zechs. Well talk with Tamara later. I promise, we'll get to the bottom of this." He nodded and looked over at his wife. She looked tired and shaken by the whole experience. Her platinum hair was ruffled, the shoulder length curls tousled and windblown. They had been relaxing in the library when news came. Noin had been reading, while he had been flipping through yearbooks and family albums. Pagan had burst in and told them that Relena had been shot at New Edwards. His mind had raced wildly then. Noin had tried to keep him calm and made arrangements at the Sanc International Hospital, one of the best in the world. Thank god she knew how to stay calm in crises. He certainly didn't.  
  
After a little while, it was obvious that Relena would not be waking up for a while. Wufei, Sally, Zechs, Noin, and Tamara all headed for Preventer Headquarters. While they were in their car, the Peacecraft family had an important discussion. "What's going on?" Noin asked Tamara directly. "We're your parents and we have the right to know what you've been up to."  
  
"It's a long story," she began, hoping to save it for later.  
  
"We have plenty of time," her father shot back, making it clear that she was to tell them everything. Tamara sighed. This was going to be interseting to explain.  
  
"A year ago, Trayan Octera contacted me to build Gundams 06 and 07," she began, catching her parents totally by surprise.  
  
Noin's eyes widened. "Octera? What were you thinking?"  
  
"I didn't know he was an Octera then. He was just this guy who said he was fighting for peace and the Sanc Kingdom. ESD was so promising. We protected those who refused to protect themselves. I decided that I wanted to become a gundam pilot to protect the Sanc Kingdom and all pacifist nations that could not protect themselves with weapons. I didn't want to see them fall to the Federation. That's the only reason why I'm fighting," she pleaded.  
  
Zechs was deeply upset, and he showed it in his voice and on his face. "When did you find out about the assassination plot? Were you involved in it?" Noin looked at her husband and then to her daughter. The look in Tamara's eyes was sad and hurt. The mother knew the answer to her usbands last question.  
  
"I found out a few minutes before it happened. I tried to destroy the other gundam before me. Zero-six was telling that Trayan was an enemy and that Ihad to destroy him. I just let zero systme take over my mind. I finally realized that I needed to warn Aunt Relena, so I went as quickly as I could. I have been trying to protect her for a year now, Dad. I wasn't invloved in the plot knowingly."  
  
"Do you know the Federation's next move?" Noin asked.  
  
"They'll take control of the government during the pandemonium. More than likely, they wll try to get rid of the Queen for good and take advantage of Earth's leaderless position. With his son to appeal to the colonies and his charm and influence on Earth, Octera could easily take power..." Noin nodded, and the car was silent for a while. The three family members were still shaken by what had just happened, and Tamara in particular was nervous. It seemed like forever before they pulled up at the Headquarters of Preventer. The Peacecrafts oarked their car and got out, taking the elevator up ot the office hallway. Lady Une, Sally as well as all the gundam pilots minus Heero were waiting for them to arrive.  
  
Tamara awkwardly took a seat. She had never been included in business matters before. This time, it was no game, though. Lady Une began to stare at her. "Tamara, there are very important issues to discuss now. The main issue being the fact that the Alliance is leaderless. A while ago, Relena and Zechs developed a plan for succession. If anything were to happen to Relena, you were to take control. I'm afraid we may have to do that."  
  
"What are you asking me to do?" Tamara asked, her heart beginning to beat wildly. Were they asking her to lead the Sanc Kingdom Alliance? Did they believe her to be the leader her aunt had been? Her father had the answer.  
  
"It has been arranged for you to take over Relena's duties until she recovers. It will reestablish the monarchy and show the Federation that we won't be beaten so easily," he explained. "I know you can do it for a few days." Tamara found that she could only nod. Lady Une had the rest of the details.  
  
"I've arranged for a press conference in a few hours. There is a formal statement for you to read. Just remerber that you are fourteen, not fifteen. Let them think that Zechs is still dead; no one has to know the truth. All we need is for you to get through this until Relena recovers. We'll be behind you all of the way, making decisions and doing what has to be done. What is needed is a figurehead, a symbol. Will you do this?"  
  
Tamara closed her eyes. "What would you want, Calen?" she asked silently. "What would you do?" She knew the answer of course. He would agree without thiking twice and throw himself into the challenge wholeheartedly. That was one of the things about him that she had admired: the way he was so serious about challenges. He always told her that one must always search for and take up new challenges. The teen smiled at the memory of her friend. "I will take up this challenge," she answered out loud. Inside, she made a promise to herself. "I will continue to live your legacy, Calen. I will avenge you someday. My work has only just begun...  
  
Noin reached over to put a hand on her daughters shoulder. "If you're going to a press conference, we should get you cleaned up," she suggested. Lady Une nodded.  
  
"Why don't you take her to the palace and get her ready for the conference. We can meet back here in an hour and a half. The rest of us can finish making final plans for this week," Une said, excusing them.  
  
"Thank you, Lady Une," Noin replied as she got up to leave. Tamara got up as well, casting a glance back at her dad. He didn't look worried or angry any more, only tired. She gave him a sad smile and a small wave as she left with her mom, but her didn't respond. He only stared after her with his nail blue eyes. She finally turned and walked with her mother out to the car. She climbed in the front seat and looked out the window. Noin started up the engine, not saying a word. Silence was probably best until they reached their destination.  
  
The old palace was not far from Headquarters, and the drive was short. The two Peacecrafts made their way up to the bedrooms. Tamara took a shower in the bathroom off the side of the room where she had been staying for the past few days. It was good to feel clean, to wash away the troubles she had on her back, just for the day. The pounding, steamy water reminded her of Victoria rains and the nights she spent working on the designs for the gundams. They had such meaning then, when they were just drawings on paper and daydreams in the minds of their creators. That was a time before she had killed, a time before she shamed her parents and the Peacecraft name.  
  
She pulled on her big cotton robe and made her way out to see what her mother was up to. Lucrezia Noin-Peacecraft had laid out a simple pai of white pants and a white shirt out, along with a floor lenght soft overcoat. It had flourishes and whorls of dark mauve decorating the collar and center. The main part of it was a pale mauve color and the material was soft and smooth. Tamara ran a finger over the fabric. "It belongs to your Aunt," she explained. "But she's never worn it before. I thought is looked like the flowers in your room." Tamara smiled. How fitting that she come to the conference dressed as the Arisze.  
  
"It's wonderful, Mother," she said, scooping up the garments. "Thank you." She proceeded to the bathroom where she pulled the neat garments on. The pants and shirt were a startling white. Perfectly pressed and amazingly comfortable, the outfit wasn't bad. At last, Tamara slipped on the overcoat. It was rather heavy, and she barely managed to button up all the buttons in front. She exited the bathroom and let her mother help her with the small tie at her neck. Then, she was ordered to sit dow on the bed while her mother brushed her hair.  
  
"You have such pretty long hair. Just like your father's," Noin remarked. Then, the brush hit a snag and she had to work out the knot. "I think you've inherited my tangled hair, dear. These knots just don't want to come out." They sat there for almost fifteen minutes just brushing her hair. It made Tamara feel almost normal, which was an odd feeling for her. When Noin was finished, she stood her daughter up and looked at her carefully. "There aren't going to be any doubts aout whose daughter you are, Tamara. And we're both proud of you, even though your dad may not always show it."  
  
"Thanks, Mom. You know, I was always proud of you guys too. I always wanted to graduate from Victoria and become a pilot just like you and Dad. I'm sorry if I hurt you guys by my decision. I only did what I thought was right," she told her mother. Noin gave her daughter a hug.  
  
"Remember, we're counting on you to pull through with this. Your aunt Relena was in the same postion several years adgo. Just remember that we'll be there for you when you need help. You won't have to do this alone."  



	15. Chapter Fifteen

Chapter Fifteen  
  
Her boots clicking down the hallway, Tamara made her way to the room that the press conference was being held in. She had the beginnings of butterflies in her stomach, and she wasn't too sure of what she was about to do. Over and over again, she had read the speech they had given her. It was short and concise, leaving out the messy details. And yet, there was so much more she wanted to say...  
  
Her father was waiting for her outside the press conference room, wearing a long trenchcoat with the collar pulled up to obscure his face. Behind the door, she could hear the bustle of a crowd. He put a hand on your shoulder. "No problem, right Ta'ra? You can do this. Think of it as a big challenge," Zechs suggested. Tamara nodded, although she still was a bit nervous.   
  
"Thanks, Dad. I'll remember that." She started to think about Calen again. What would he say about this whole mess? He would probably laugh at her nervousness and crack or joke or two about her social skills to make her laugh and loosen up. At the same time, he would try to help her in any way he could. He was a great friend like that. She gave a slight smile, and her father opened the door. Tamara took a deep breath in and fixed her face in a warm, friendly smile that she had seen her aunt Relena use on many occasions. Her dad could not be seen behind the doors, but it was comforting to know he was right there.  
  
The reporters began to flash their cameras, and the room became silent except for the clicking of the photographers. When the flashes stopped going off, she took a deep breath. Glancing down at her papers on the podium, she began her speech. "As you probably know, Queen Relena Darlian-Peacecraft of the Sanc Kingdom Alliance was shot today. As Lady Une has stated in a previous press conference, she is expected to recover in a week. But until then, the Alliance must not be left leaderless. For the next week, I will be taking the office of the Princess of the Sanc Kingdom. My name is Tamara Victoria Noin-Peacecraft, daughter of Milliardo Peacecraft and Lucrezia Noin-Peacecraft. As Queen Relena's niece and only blood descendant, she has arranged for me to succeed her in case of such an emergency as this one. I intend to keep up the peace talks with the Federation and fulfill the legacy of my aunt until she recovers. I would like to take this opportunity now to make a request to Commander Octera as well as to all of the Earth Sphere Military Federation. Please end this pointless war. Every day only brings more civilian casualties and plunges this land further into the terror of war. Innocent people are dying needlessly.."  
  
She trailed off a bit, her mind seeing the images of Victoria. "Arisze..." the voice rang in her head, setting off the memories again. She shook them away. "Despite Queen Relena's absence, I beg you to keep pushing for peace on Earth and in space. Thank you." Tamara ended, bowing her head and thinking about her long gone friend. "Are you proud of me Calen? I will keep fighting for you. Perhaps I can keep other tragedies from happening. If I keep someone from losing a friend or family member, my life will be worth while."  
  
Many of the journalists had questions. "How could you be Milliardo Peacecraft's daughter? Wasn't he killed in After Colony 195?" one called.  
  
"I have never known my father," Tamara stated with a totally straight face. "My mother said that they were married shortly before the battle in space."  
  
Another asked her age. "I am sixteen years old as of October. But I don't think that will keep me from being a good leader. After all, my aunt become Queen of the world at fifteen and Vice Foreign Minister at the same age that I am now." There were many more questions to answer before Lady Une stepped in and rounded it up. After a few last questions, she was dismissed and was allowed to leave. Lady Une stood on the podium and gave a few last remarks for the record.  
  
Tamara finally escaped the room feeling confident. She hadn't screwed up or forgotten anything at least. She only hoped she didn't sound too grown up or fake. And she hoped that they bought her lies about her father. The reporters were filing out of the room, so she sneaked behind a door and listened. They were filled with gossip. "They say that she's really Relena's illegitimate daughter."  
  
"I don't know. She looks a lot like Milliardo Peacecraft. You know, the hair and all. And those piercing eyes."  
  
"Probably some evil little kid with ideas of ruling the world, just like that Mariemaia kid." Tamara took offense at that. She had always known Mariemaia Khushrenada to be really nice, like an older sister almost. And she also resented being called evil, when she knew perfectly well she was not.  
  
"I don't know," the other journalist replied. "She seems to young and innocent to be evil. If Queen Relena trusts her, I think she's probably alright." Tamara smiled again, listening to the conversation until someone walked up behind her and put a hand on her shoulder. She turned around to see Lucrezia Noin-Peacecraft standing behind her.  
  
"Mom! Don't scare me like that!" she said, gasping.  
  
"Sorry, Tamara. I was just wondering where you went after the conference," her mother explained, leading the fifteen year old girl back to the residential area of the palace.  
  
"Did you see the conference? How did I do?" she asked nervously.  
  
Her mom answered her with a typical, "You did fine, sweetie." The raven haired Preventer cracked a grin. "You were a little stiff for a little bit, but not much. You relaxed as time went on. Pretty soon, all this will feel normal."  
  
"I'm glad I don't have to do this every day," Tamara remarked to her mother. Noin sighed.  
  
"Tamara, you may have to start doing this. It's not just for the next few days that you're going to be involved in this. You are Relena's heir, it's up to you to continue the monarchy of the Sanc Kingdom. This is a thing that will be for the rest of your life. Your father and I didn't think that something like this would happen, but we did try to raise you so you would know what to do if you were thrust into a situation like this." She brought her voice down to a whisper. "Just goes to show you that being a Peacecraft is more trouble than it is worth. So many burdens, so many constraints. If people ever find out about your gundam thing, it would cause a huge scandal. That's why..." Tamara never let her mother finish.  
  
"Are you saying that I can't be a pilot anymore? Who's going to protect the Sanc Kingdom? Without the gundams, there will be no one left to prevent the Federation from destroying the Earth and the colonies!" she exclaimed angrily.  
  
"Calm down, Tamara," her mother said seriously. "I know you want to, but for now, just try to use words instead of weapons." She nodded, but in her head she disagreed. There are some things that just couldn't be solved with words. And this is one of them. Words wouldn't save more people from dying. Only total war could bring about total peace.  
  
*  
  
The next few days were long and eventful. Relena was moved into the palace, along with a doctor and lots of medical equipment. Heero arrived with her looking like he hadn't slept since Relena was shot. He began to leave and go where no one could find him, which worried some of the people in the mansion. The Sanc Kingdom seemed to be bustling with Preventers and former gundam Pilots. Duo and Hilde were there, along with Adam Maxwell. Trowa, Wufei, Sally, and Noin were on Mars colony, investigating the disappearance of an Alliance diplomat. It was too mysterious to go unnoticed, and Lady Une decided that the problem needed to be solved quickly.  
  
Tamara tried as hard as she could to fill the office of her aunt. It was difficult to be respected as a Princess of the Sanc Kingdom when people thought about her as just a little girl. She intended to prove to them that she was not just a child. She found herself growing up very quickly. It was a side of her that had developed since becoming a gundam pilot, a professional and down-to-business personality. With all that had happened, she felt so mature. It would be wonderful, she thought, just to relax at home and read a book on the couch while watching cartoons.  
  
Peace talks were nearly futile. Commander Octera was much like his son, with jet black hair and piercing eyes. He refused to negotiate, and maintained that all he wanted was equality in the government. Tamara felt like screaming at him for manipulating ESD like he did, but she held her calm. One of the many things that she had learned was diplomacy. It was truly infuriating to argue for hours but get nowhere.  
  
It was nice to get help from her dad, Lady Une, and lots of the adults. They made most of the decisions in her name, but she was able to do some things on her own. It had been her idea to propose giving relief to people and places destroyed by the war. And she had been the one that wanted to include the colonies in the Sanc Kingdom Alliance. The adults had protested that they shouldn't' bring the colonies into the war, but Tamara disagreed. Trayan would convince the colonies to join the Federation. They would never choose Earth's Peacecrafts over the Trayan Octera, the colonist.  
  
She began to wonder how Relena had been able to lead the whole world at the age of fifteen. And she had been all alone, too. Tamara shuddered to think of taking on the whole situation on her own. She had never understood how much work it truly was, all the pent-up emotion and strain, all the stress of the job. It was the responsibility that seemed to age her, day by day. The only good thing was that it kept her from her anger at Trayan and her betrayal.  
  
Relena slowly recovered, coming out of her coma in a day or so. Everyone was always crowding around. Her sense of humor was quickly regained; she joked that she had finally gotten the vacation she wanted. Zechs had been overly protective of his little sister for quite some time after she woke up. Everyone was acting strangely after the accident. Heero spent all of his time either with Relena or somewhere that no one could find him. Tamara suspected that Duo knew, but the braided ex-pilot said nothing as to the whereabouts of his friend.  
  
It was rather comforting to have the Maxwells around. The old palace did have a certain sense of... chaos to it, but it grew to be a homely place. Adam Maxwell was lively, always pulling practical jokes. Tamara found everything very humorous until she found every pair of shoes she owned hanging on the tree outside her room. For a few days, a practical joke war raged. But despite the fun and games, the fifteen year old girl still remained solemn, and dedicated to her mission.  
  
As Tamara sat in a meeting one day, she began to think of the betrayal for the first time in days. What would she do after Relena returned? There was no ESD to go back to, and the Preventers had Gundam Swiftstrike. Her life was going to change monumentally. She would have to learn to use words instead of weapons, as her mother would say. The fifteen year old monarch snapped out of her reverie when Commander Octera took the podium. His piercing eyes shot out at her and grinned a quite evil grin. Whatever he had to say was definitely not something pleasant...  
  
  
  



	16. Chapter Sixteen

Chapter Sixteen  
  
"I have been informed that there is a crisis brewing on Mars colony," he began in a sinister tone of voice. It sent shivers down Tamara's back. He was most definitely up to something. "I come to you today as an ambassador from the Earth Sphere Military Federation. We have recently sent diplomats to each of the colonies as a gesture of our goodwill towards space." Tamara snorted slightly- spies and mobile suits were more likely.  
  
"Today, we have received knowledge that our ambassador to Mars has been murdered by Sanc Kingdom forces. Therefore, we are issuing an ultimatum. Unless the Sanc Kingdom immediately negotiates a treaty concerning the world government with us, we have every right to blow Mars into pieces. Her voice caught in her throat. They were going to blow up Mars?! She leapt to her feet.  
  
"What you are proposing is genocide! You've gone too far this time, Octera," she accused. Tamara was too angry to care what she was acting like. There were ministers tugging at her sleeve and pulling her down, but she remained standing, facing Octera.  
  
"Princess Tamara, I assure you, we are within our rights to retaliate to the murder of our diplomat," he answered coolly. "But I would like to request a private audience with you later to resolve this matter. Perhaps we can reach a settlement." Tamara sat back down, disgusted.  
  
"Very well." She was steaming with rage. Beyond the balcony, she could see Lady Une and a tall shadowy figure that was probably her father. From what she could see, they were both distressed. Her mother was on Mars, along with half of her family. The Federation had manipulated her and her mother. They had set everything up, knowing that she would be forced into such a position. What choice would she have?  
  
The fifteen year old sat and stewed in her anger for the remainder of the time. At last, the congress was adjourned and she went back to her aunt Relena's office with Octera following close after. Lady Une began to make her way towards them, Preventer Wind having disappeared. She caught up with Tamara and looked into the teen's eyes. "Let me handle this," she ordered. The younger girl stopped walking.  
  
"I can handle this Lady Une, believe me. I will not negotiate and I will find a way to get everyone out alive. Trust me for once," she begged. Lady Une nodded in assent.  
  
"I'm still going in with you though," she persisted. Tamara nodded and walked inside the office, followed by Lady Une and Octera. She sat down at the desk and looked at the commander, shooting daggers out of her eyes. "Your time is short, Commander. And I will warn you, my patience is thin."  
  
"Princess, you really don't have many options. Either negotiate with us, or we blow up Mars. Just try using your gundam and we will reveal your little secret to the public. Wouldn't it be scandalous.... and just at the right time, to. Either way, you will negotiate with us. Unless you want to see your mother die. She won't be getting off Mars, I assure you. All space ports have been closed and all craft will be shot down. We have issued this order to the colony already, and they have protested to the Congress. But I am confident that the Congress will not go against the orders of the Federation."  
  
"What do you want, Octera? Give me a reason for all those pointless casualties."  
  
"We want control of the government. The colonies will be under our control and we will set up mobile suit production. For their protection, of course. The Federation will protect the peace. And you so called pacifists will not oppose us."  
  
"You are lower than your son, Octera, which I did not think to be possible. When do you want my answer?" Tamara spat.  
  
"In twenty four hours, Princess Tamara. And let me assure you, if Swiftstrike flies again, I will make sure everyone from here to L-5 knows who's in the pilot seat. The media will be focusing their attention on you, our leader, in these times of crisis."  
  
"I will thank you for getting out of my office, Octera. You will have my answer in forty eight hours." Her face was masked over with fury. Lady Une was looking similarly furious. Octera, on the other hand, appeared smug and cool. He thought that he had won this little game. But it wasn't over yet. The Commander stalked out of the office.  
  
"What are we going to do now?" wondered Tamara, trying to calm down.  
  
Lady Une pulled up a chair. "We consider our options. There's really not much we can do in 24 hours. I'm going to contacting the other Preventers."  
  
Tamara agreed, nodding her head. "As soon as possible. Get a hold of Heero and Duo. They should be able to come up with something between the two of them." She let out a deep sigh. "He sure knows how to screw everything up in only a few minutes."  
  
"Commander Octera is just taking advantage of the situation. Soon, Relena will be up and about, and able to come back to her job. Then, you won't have to worry about this kind of decision making." Lady Une pointed out. "I think we all keep forgetting that you're still a child sometimes. And other times, we treat you too much like a little girl."  
  
"I can do this, Lady Une. You guys are all trusting me, and I'm not about to let you down. If anything, I'll fly Swiftstrike out and take out the missile base. All you'll have to do is distance Aunt Relena from me." She thought for a while about that, but it would never work. Octera would whip up a storm of controversy and use the chaos to engineer a takeover. There were so few options. The fifteen year old pounded her fist down on her desk. "There just aren't any options!" she fumed. "I can't use Swiftstrike, I can't agree to Octera's terms, I can't get the people off of Mars before they destroy it, and I can't betray my family, my friends, or my fellow human beings! There had better be a solution for this mess."  
  
Lady Une only shook her head. "Why don't we go back to the palace for today. We have twenty four hours to get an answer. Maybe Relena will be awake and you can ask for her advice. And besides, I need to drop by and check on Mariemaia." Tamara nodded her head. Home was just where she wanted to be right now.  
  
*  
  
Relena was just waking up in her room filled with monitors and equipment. She opened her eyes slowly and lazily. She was still a little bit sleepy, but had enough of sleeping all day. The bandages around her side were stiff and uncomfortable. The Queen of the Sanc Kingdom Alliance pushed herself up to a sitting position. As she did so, she looked around to see if anyone was there. There was usually someone in the room with her. Every time she woke up, her brother or Heero or the others would be sitting in the room with her while she slept.  
  
She had recovered from her injuries as expected, but the doctors didn't want her out of bed quite yet. They said that she would only have to spend three more days in bed, and after that she couldn't travel or make any long speeches at the Congress. She was only surprised they hadn't made her take sponge baths and go on a liquid diet. Relena kept trying to convince everyone that she was doing fine, but no one would listen. They just told her to get well soon and not worry about politics.  
  
Tamara had been doing a fine job, from what she heard. She was just thinking about her niece when a firm knock came from the other side of the door. "Come in," Relena called to whomever was at the door. Her niece entered the room with a look on her face that told her aunt that she was tired and didn't know what to do. "Is there a problem, Tamara?" she asked, gesturing to a spot on the bed where the girl could sit.  
  
The fifteen year old sat down and relayed to her aunt the happenings at the Congress building that day. Relena just listened, mortified at what she heard. "I don't know what to do, Aunt Relena. What would you do?" the girl finished.  
  
"I don't know," she answered, perplexed. "I do know that we have to protect the people of Mars, no matter what. People are always more important than politics. That's what I decided when they were attacking the Sanc Kingdom all those years ago. I didn't want the people to keep needlessly dying because I wouldn't end the war. When you see people die before you, your perspective changes. I keep thinking of you at Victoria."  
  
"Victoria..." Tamara murmured, staring past her aunt. Her thoughts jumped to her best friend. "I could end the war now, Calen. The Federation would have what they want, but their brutality towards everyone would never cease. I will continue to fight for peace everywhere. And that will be my revenge for you."  
  
"You've done such a good job, Tamara. Even I'm surprised at what you've been able to do. And as soon as I'm back in the ring, we'll see about your proposal with the colonies," Relena assured her niece, putting a hand on her shoulder. The only sensible decision would be to settle it out. I know I told you to never negotiate with terrorists, but I fear we may have to this time. The stakes are just too high." She bowed her head. "They do not yet understand that taking more lives will only fuel the war."  
  
"I understand, Aunt Relena. I suppose I should relay this to the Congress?" The Queen shook her head.  
  
"The Congress will disagree with whatever you say; they are stubborn and idealistic. Do what you want, not what they want you to do," she advised.  
  
Tamara managed a slight grin. "Thanks for your help. I hope you'll be feeling better soon." With that, the fifteen year old got up and left her aunt to sit back and admire the work she had done. Relena reached for a remote that turned on a monitor. From her bed, she could see and hear Tamara walking down the halls of the Sanc Kingdom palace. "So, it really does work. Duo will be thrilled," she said to herself. She leaned back and continued to watch her niece make her way to the congress building. This was one secret meeting that she was not going to miss...  
  
Meanwhile, at the Sanc Kingdom Alliance Congress Building, Tamara was just getting out of the car and grabbing her briefcase as she made her way to the offices. According to her staff, Octera was still at the Congress building in his own improvised office. She marched up to his office and knocked firmly on the door. At last, the door swung open, revealing two men in the room.  
  
"Ah, Princess Tamara, I believe you already know my son, Trayan," Octera introduced mockingly. He glared at her, and she glared right back.  
  
"Yes, I'm sorry to say that I have met the treacherous liar, but you know what they say, the apple never rots far from the tree."  
  
"Arisze, or Tamara or whatever you call yourself now, as much as we would love to stand here and trade insults with you, we really are busy. What do you want?" Trayan asked coldly.  
  
"I want to work out a settlement." You would think Tamara had said the magic words, because both Octeras went quiet. She continued on with her proposal. "I will not agree to all of your terms. However, I am willing to negotiate. These are the terms: first, you will not attack any more colonies or places on Earth. Second, the Earth's government will not and never be ruled by militarists. However, we are able to give you seats in the Congress to make voting more fair. Understand that this a courtesy, Commander. We have no obligation to give you a say in the matters of our Alliance."  
  
"You can stop now, Princess. The Federation will have all it's terms met or none at all. And I don't think you really want your mother dear to die, now do you? It's easy. Just sign the document saying that you give over control of the Alliance to the Federation. It's your only option. Their blood will be on your hands," Octera threatened.  
  
"No. Their blood is already on your hands, along with the blood of thousands of others. And the blood of the people you killed was rise up and destroy you one day." She turned on her heel to leave when Trayan caught her wrist. Naturally, she spun back around to tell him off.  
  
"Listen, Tamara. You're nothing to the Alliance. If the Congress finds out that you're a gundam pilot, they'll want to burn you at the sake. And your aunt won't save you. You're a warrior too, just like I am. Why are you supporting those who despise you? They will just toss you aside like yesterday's garbage when this is through. Why don't you join the Federation? It could be like old times again," he said. Tamara thought for a while, then slapped him across the face.  
  
"Touch me again, Octera, and you will find why I am called Arisze. You should know better than to try to convince a Peacecraft to fight against peace." With that, she stalked out angrily. "I will see you in half and hour at an emergency meeting of the Alliance Congress," she called behind her angrily. She knew she shouldn't have lost her temper, and now she didn't know what Octera would do. And adding Trayan to the   
equation would make things worse.  
  
*  
  
The Congress was buzzing with the news. There was so little time to go before a final decision must be made. There were rumors going around like wildfire. Some suspected that a settlement had been reached. Others believed that the Alliance was not going to agree to the Federation's commands. At last, Tamara emerged and walked to the podium in front. The young monarch had a slightly devious grin on her face as she took the podium. She cued her helper, and a giant monitor was switched on.  
  
"This," she said, gesturing to the large object in the middle of the screen, "is the Federation's missile outpost. It is currently in orbit of Mars, prepared to destroy the colony if we do not agree to all their demands. It is a hard decision, whether or not to agree. The question is, are we able to protect ourselves from their threat. Either way, the answer is no."  
  
Suddenly, she stopped her speech. The monitor showed two high speed objects hurtling towards the missile outpost. The white one got there first. It was long and pod shaped, and when it got close, it exploded into a sea of gundamium feathers. Wing Zero had arrived on the scene. It pulled out it's beam saber and just hovered for a moment, as if to mock the Federation. Back in the Sanc Kingdom, Tamara smiled. "So that's what Heero and Duo were up to," she mused. Out of nowhere, a black gundam swooped down, scythe in hand and ready to fight. She listened through the ear phone in her ear. "Shinigami is back and ready to kick some Federation butt," he shouted over the intercom.  
  
The gundams proceeded to fight off the few mobile dolls that were protecting the missile base. When Wing Zero pulled out his beam cannon, Tamara knew that the battle was over. She watched joyously as Heero brought his gundam back and fired on the missile base with all the power his beam cannon had. And then, there were a few seconds when nothing happened, and suddenly a flash of light lit up the screen. She heard two more words over the intercom. "Mission complete."  
  
But they weren't just over the intercom. She looked in the direction of the voice, as did the entire congress. Whispers seem to fly across the building. "It's Queen Relena!" The monarch wheeled herself to the front in a wheelchair. She was looking extremely triumphant as she passed Octera, who was fuming at the defeat. She finally reached the podium and smiled at Tamara.   
  
"I would like to start by thanking Tamara for her strong and courageous leadership over these past few days. However, I find that I cannot stay in bed while the Alliance and the Federation are locked in such a power struggle. It is time that we fought back, Congressmen. The gundams once stood for the colonies, to protect them from the dangers of OZ and the Romafeller Foundation. Now, they will stand for all people that have hearts that wish for peace. If you will refuse to protect yourself, you can not lament when you get hurt. Without the gundams, Mars colony would be destroyed."  
  
Tamara politely excused herself, feeling so free, more free than she had felt in days. She backed away and out of the Congress building. Relena was still in there, giving a speech, but she was only worried about going home. A car waited outside for her. At the drivers seat was her father. He motioned for her to get in, and she did. "Quite the entrance, wasn't it?" Zechs looked over at his daughter. "I suppose you want to go straight home?" Tamara nodded, settling into a quiet mood.  
  
Preventer Wind was highly relieved. Noin would be on the next shuttle to the Sanc Kingdom, and would probably be home in a day or two. His life had stopped when Octera had announced his plan. The predicament had almost made him go insane. There had been secret meetings, conspiracies, and plans all week. Some of them had involved his little girl, some had been behind her back. She was just a child, whether the others would realize it or not. She was not ready to jump into a world of political conspiracy.  
  
He tried to start a conversation with his daughter. Noin was always chiding him for being too quiet, and he sensed that Tamara was the same way. "What are you planning on doing tonight, now that you can relax for a bit?"  
  
"Hn," was the only answer he got.  
  
"You've been around Heero too much," he teased slightly. He was trying to make conversation. But what could they talk about? This whole parenting thing could get so confusing. It was still a mystery how she could get along with her uncles perfectly fine, but he could barely carry on a simple conversation. "It must be a teenage thing," he decided.  
  
Tamara was inside her own little world, stuck in a land of replays. The events of her life were running over and over in her head, making her almost insane. She could see every second of her life, from the days when she was left in her parent's office to losing Calen, to Trayan's betrayal and the missile crisis. It was Calen's loss that was plaguing her now. Over and over again, she was seeing the scene that haunted her nightmares, a view of falling stone and smoking fires, all the death and destruction. And the only person to ever befriend her, the one she trusted, laying there with those awful injuries, dying. And she could do nothing but watch... Her fists started to clench in anger, but some inner voice told her not to. "No anger," it said. "You've been hiding behind your anger for too long. Everything that's happened has been for your best friend. Listen to yourself." With that, Tamara began crying, silent tears rolling down her cheeks.  
  
"Calen..." she sighed. "I want more than anything to get the revenge I promised you. But I don't want to be like this. Can you forgive me for all that I have done? If you can, then I must say my good-bye. I have a life to live, and I'm going to live it. I guess I never really let you go."  
  
  
Well, are you exited for the next chapter? Do you wish to send me flames? Please write a review or write to me. I am very glad to get your comments, criticisms, and suggestions! Next chapter: what will happen as the controversy cools down and Tamara doesn't have her gundam to distract her? Will she go stark raving mad? Tune in for the next installment of Shattered Serenity!  



	17. Chapter Seventeen

  
Chapter Seventeen  
  
At the Peacecraft household, Tamara found herself sitting in the basement alone. It was fairly dark down there, which was welcome to the fifteen year old. The visions still ran through her mind, but the little voice was chasing them away. She picked up another dart and hurled it at the dartboard. She felt like screaming right now. Everything in her life had caught up with her now, her mind returning to her body. Ignoring the little voice, she let her anger overwhelm her. Anger was good, safe. If she wasn't angry, then she would be sad, afraid, maybe even cry a little. And she had sworn never to cry over anything again.  
  
"I thought we agreed on no anger?" the little voice asked. "It's okay to have feelings." It was then that she recognized the voice. She closed her eyes, letting her photographic memory take her back to a hot summer day at Victoria. It had been too hot to go out, so she and Calen had stayed in the library to do some research. She had gotten emotional when Duo had been seriously injured during a Preventer mission. The only reaction she knew to have was anger at the people who had done this. Calen had calmed her down, told her that it was okay to feel emotions like sorrow and worry. "It's okay to have feelings," he had said. "If you want to cry, you know you'll always have a shoulder to cry on."  
  
"Arisze, listen to me. You really haven't let go of your feelings yet. This anger isn't helping anyone, certainly not helping me. One teen can only take so much, and from the way your mind looks, you can't take anymore without going insane."  
  
"Why don't you be quiet?" she yelled. "I'm already hearing voices, I'm already insane. And I'll have you know that I was doing fine. Just because I don't cry and get all emotional doesn't mean I'm crazy. It just means that I'm strong."  
  
"You know, you probably feel like you have to be strong because that was how you had to be as a kid."  
  
"Don't use that psychology crap on me, it's not going to work. Just leave me alone. I'm doing fine all by myself."  
  
"No you're not."  
  
"Yes I am."  
  
"No you're not."  
  
"Yes I am."  
  
"That went well. So, I guess you just can't stay sane without me? Glad to know someone needs me."  
  
"Listen, this is not real. I am only hearing bits and pieces of your voice that my brain is pulling together because I am tired, upset, and a little overwhelmed. You humor is thus not appreciated, but I would appreciate it if you would leave."  
  
"I can't."  
  
"What do you mean you can't?" she asked the voice.  
  
"You never really let me go. You've been talking to me, making promises to me since you left Victoria. I may be just voices and bits of memory from your brain, but that's what is hurting you right now, not myself. It's the memories that you won't let go of. You always were stubborn like that. But don't worry. I may not have a shoulder to cry on anymore, but I'm still there for you."  
  
Tamara took a deep breath and felt it catch in her throat as the voice spoke to her. A shoulder to cry on... Her pent-up tears came rolling out. Even though she had sworn never to cry again, here she was in the basement of the palace weeping for a night long gone by. "You were my best friend," she cried. "All I wanted was revenge. But I understand now. I can't hold all my secrets in anymore, and I have to let you go." She wiped her eyes a little so they weren't as blurry. "Calen, this is my final good-bye. Swiftstrike has been built and has saved innocent lives. Your legacy has been fulfilled. May you rest in peace."  
  
After another hour of crying, her tears dried up. Strangely, she felt better. It was as if there had been a burden on her shoulders, a burden that had just been lifted. She realized that the images had stopped. No matter how hard she looked, she did not see the nightmare, only the lake and the warm nights spent there, creating a friendship. Tamara knew she would always miss him; he had been her only friend. But now, she had moved on as she never knew she could.  
  
She resumed playing darts, thinking of Trayan. That incident still angered her. He had betrayed her and used her knowledge of engineering to build him a weapon that he could use to destroy the Alliance. But she could not allow that to happen. It was her mess, and as her mother always said- "Clean up your own messes before they get out of hand." Her aim was a little off as she angrily threw darts at the dartboard.  
  
And suddenly, a dart zoomed past her and hit the dead center of the dartboard. She turned around to see a woman standing in the doorway. "You're pretty angry, I can tell. Otherwise you would have been hitting the middle." Tamara began to say something, but stopped. "I have a business proposal for you, Tamara. And a very reasonable one at that. Are you interested?"  
  
Tamara let out a slight grin. "Try me."  
  
*  
  
Lady Une, Zechs, Noin, and Relena crowded into the boardroom at the Sanc Kingdom Preventer Headquarters. They were talking among themselves. All of them had received letters requesting a meeting then next day. The Peacecrafts had quickly figured out that they had both been called. The group was cautious as they entered the seemingly empty boardroom. They stood there for a while, puzzled as to what to do.  
  
"Welcome, dearest parents," Tamara said, wheeling around in her chair. She was dressed neatly in a uniform of some type with a smile on her face that her parents hadn't seen in quite some time.  
  
"We have a business proposition for you," came Mariemaia's voice. The 23 year old woman wheeled around in her seat to face the adults. Her shoulder length hair was pulled back, and she was wearing an impressive looking blue uniform, complete with cape and black boots. She was grinning happily. "Tamara and I have formed a new organization. Introducing: the new OZ organization." The fifteen year old moved to uncover an easel with diagrams and drawings on it.  
  
"We decided to form an organization that will protect the Alliance from destruction. After the Federation Missile Crisis, Mariemaia and I decided that even pacifists need protection. In the old days, that was left to the gundams. However, we feel that more is needed," Tamara explained, moving along the papers. She showed them one of a new mobile suit. "I redesigned some things. This is the new Gemini mobile suit, much like the Mercurius and Vayeate. I also tweaked a few things on classic designs like the Leo, the Aries, and the Taurus. Mobile suit production is taken care of, thanks to Howard and Duo."  
  
"Quatre has also agreed to help out financially," pitched in Mariemaia. "And of course, Heero and Trowa are helping us as well."  
  
"How long have you been planning this?" Lady Une demanded.  
  
"Since Relena's return to office. It's amazing what you can get done in a week and a half," Tamara told them triumphantly. She adjusted the cuff of her red suit and looked at her parents. They were completely stunned. "We are also working on rebuilding the other gundams," she continued. "I understand that Preventers still has Talgeese III..."  
  
Zechs nodded in assent. "We had planned on using it near Mars, but Wing Zero and Deathscythe were already rebuilt and ready for a test flight."  
  
"Who is going to lead OZ?" Noin asked skeptically.  
  
"Please don't be insulted," Mariemaia began, "but we intend to lead it."  
  
"We talked about it for a long time. At first, we considered making you leaders, since you once served in the old OZ organization and since you had experience," Tamara explained.  
  
"And then we took a look at Tamara's short reign. She had all the popularity of you two," she said, indicating Relena and Zechs, "but was able to distance herself from your mistakes. We decided that the same would be true here. We can appeal to the better sides of your nature. We also hope to have your help and support, naturally."  
  
"And you two think you can handle running an army?" Lady Une asked incredulously. "Do you think it will stop the Federation? What will the Alliance Congress say?"  
  
"Leave the Congress to me," Relena grinned. "They won't be a problem."  
  
"There are actually many people who are willing to fight for the Alliance, so we should have no shortage of pilots. We have looked into all aspects of our decision."  
  
"I have to say, I am starting to agree with you. We need to stand up for ourselves and our ideals. And we need weapons to do that," Lady Une finally stated.  
  
"We should have everything completed shortly, including the first bunch of mobile suits. The Federation won't know what hit them," Mariemaia remarked with a mischievous grin.  
  
*  
  
The young commanders appeared at Congress to make their official declaration. Tamara smoothed her red suit nervously. It was a wool dress-coat that came down to her mid thigh, along with a pair of white pants and knee high black boots. It was a welcome change from her normal light blue suit. The military uniform felt comfortable and natural almost. From it's high collar with the signature marks that identified her as commander to the monogrammed buttons across the chess to her boots, it felt as if this was where she was meant to be. Her father had told her earlier that day that he was proud of her. She had been puzzled and asked him why, when she had betrayed the Peacecraft name. He had only shaken his head and told her that he was proud that she was fighting for peace and for the people. She hadn't known what to say, so she had thanked him and gone off to meet Mariemaia. The teen girl hoped that her parents would help her through this new ordeal.  
  
Mariemaia Khushrenada was pensive. She was used to being a figurehead, but actually running the show would take a great deal of strategy and skill. She and her younger partner made up for each other's weaknesses. And the 23 year old knew she could trust Tamara, who she had watched grow up. It had been so strange, watching everyone grow older, some people grow closer, and others grow apart.  
  
The OZ announcement was surprisingly well received. The Sanc Kingdom Alliance Congress seemed to accept the turn of events, which was fortunate. Tamara sensed that Relena had twisted a few arms to get this move approved. She stood in front of the Congress once again, felling safe because she knew that all her uncles and her parents were behind her, helping her. "It is time to stop the Federation, before they take anymore lives," she finished. There was clapping, and Mariemaia shot a glance at her companion. Things were only just beginning...  
  
  
People, I am very sorry to say that I have the most terrible and vicious disease I can get..... writers block! My muse is on protest due to low wages and not enough reviews. She is also tired and petitioning for a vacation. Thus, comments and criticism (constructive, please) are welcome, even needed. Thanks so much. My muse tends to ramble when I run out of ideas.  



	18. Chapter Eighteen

Chapter Eighteen  
  
Noin sat in the Peacecraft mansion as she watched her daughter come in from her long run. Tamara was dressed in her favorite sweat pants and sweatshirt and determined to keep training as hard as ever. She watched as the girl ran up and started into her martial arts exercises. She really was working herself hard today. Noin frowned, hoping that she didn't sprain anything or get hurt from working too much. She could remember the time she trained too hard for physical fitness competitions at Victoria and had pulled some muscles and couldn't compete.  
  
"She doesn't need anymore physical training. What she needs is etiquette and behavior training," came a low voice from behind her. Zechs crossed over to the window. "She's a born leader, but not a born politician." She cracked a smile and looked over at her husband.  
  
"I think Tamara really wants to prove herself to everyone. You know how she is. Ever since she was a child, she's always wanted to be the best so people would like her, or   
at least respect her. Things haven't changed."  
  
"I'm just glad she will be working with Mariemaia. They'll make a good team; each makes up for the other's weaknesses." They stood and watched at their daughter kicked and jabbed at the air. "She still has things she's not telling us about, I think. Something happened at Victoria, she hasn't been the same since," Zechs observed.  
  
"She seems a lot happier these past few days. I just wish she would quit this obsessive training thing," she answered.  
  
"You're one to talk," he teased right back. He glanced down at his daughter. She had stopped her martial arts and was drinking out of a water bottle. She looked as if she was getting tired. Tamara was heading in to the palace building with all her gear. Her parents exchanged mischievous looks and slipped off to carry out their secret plan.  
  
Meanwhile, Tamara was making her way up the stairs to her room. All she wanted was a cool shower right now. She pushed into her room and pulled off her soaked sweat outfit. The water of her shower was cool and relaxing, and she let out a deep breath. This week had been tough; she was still avoiding the temptation to start talking to Calen again. She thought about the memories for a while. The only memories that were with her now were the memories of how much fun they had together on days like this. They always loved the windy fall days, when they would set aside the books and talk until the sun set. That was what she missed most now; someone to talk to.  
  
She jumped out of the shower and pulled on a robe. Her wet hair dripped down her back as she looked for something to wear. She finally settled on a dress that would be comfortable in the warm but windy temperatures. With that, she made her way out of her room. Tamara wandered the hallways for some time. Her parents, not to mention her aunts and uncles were nowhere around. She finally decided to search her office on the ground floor. She swung open the door and looked around the dark room. "That's funny," she said to herself. "I don't remember turning the lights off." She reached for the light switch.  
  
"Surprise!" Her family was standing around the room smiling. The room was decorated with banners and confetti. "You didn't think we'd forget your birthday, did you?" her father asked with a grin. "October 2nd, in the late morning. You were really eager to get out, as I recall. Your mom didn't even get to finish her disgusting milkshake." Noin laughed.  
  
"Peanut butter and broccoli milkshakes, as I recall. I never should have let Sally take me to that health food place." Tamara smiled as she listened to the stories of her childhood. She had almost forgotten that today was indeed her birthday. The only date she remembered anymore was December 27th. Everyone was there, including all her aunts and uncles from the colonies. Aunt Hilde came up and gave her a big hug.  
  
"Sweet 16! We just had to throw you a party! And it's so nice to see you again." She gave one of her wide grins, only to be surpassed by Duo's. It was so nice of them to remember, she thought. The group led her outside, where they had set up a picnic table in the back. There was a birthday cake, complete with multi-colored frosting and little drawings of gundams fighting that made Tamara laugh.  
  
"We were going to draw a picture of your Dad and Heero fighting, but.." Sally whispered in Tamara's ear, making the girl giggle.  
  
"Speaking of Uncle Heero, where is he?" she asked. Aunt Relena turned around and looked upset.  
  
"I haven't seen him. I even told him that we had plans for your party today. I know that Lady Une doesn't have a mission for him." Lady Une, who was speaking with Noin on the other end of the table, turned to answer.  
  
"There are no missions for Preventer, but Heero may have had something else come up." As if on cue, Heero came heading toward them, carrying a large and long black case with a single handle. Tamara watched Relena roll her eyes angrily and give him the death glare.  
  
"Heero Yuy!" she said, standing up. "I thought that we agreed on no missions today. What is in that black box?!" Heero turned to Tamara and winked. Then, he turned back to Relena.  
  
"The usual, guns, explosives. Why don't you take a look, Tamara." He slid her the case, which was really rather heavy. She opened it, only to find a beautifully crafted croquet set. The wooden mallets were a deep brown, decorated with colored rings. Each mallet had its matching ball, with wooden wickets and poles to go along with the set.  
  
"This looks like fun," she commented. "I've never played this game before!" Everyone was laughing at the joke. Duo, Heero, Quatre, Noin, Adam Maxwell, and Tamara decided to play croquet, while the others were preoccupied with eating and chatting amongst themselves. Quatre set up the wickets and attempted to explain the game to the others. The 16 year old thought it looked easy at first, but quickly found out otherwise. Playing was hilarious. With her and Adam painfully behind the others, she watched the grown up's antics. Heero and Duo were each trying to hit each other's croquet balls and knock them out of the court. Quatre was in the lead, having played the most croquet. Just when he was about to get back through the last few wickets, WHACK! Noin popped up behind the amazed Quatre, yellow mallet in hand.   
  
"Look's like it will take you a while to get back," she chortled, passing him. He looked flustered, but trudged over to the spot where his orange ball lay. Tamara laughed from her spot, two wickets away. She had passed Adam, and was almost past Duo. She looked from her own blue ball to Duo's black one. If she tried, she could knock him out. Or she could get past him, but only with the perfect shot. She took careful aim and swung her mallet, which barely missed hitting Adam in the head. Duo gasped as he got ready for her ball to collide with his, but it didn't. The ball sailed through the wicket and on to the next, settling just barely under it. Tamara let out a deep sigh. "Not bad for a beginner," her mother remarked as she hit the pole, making her the first winner.  
  
After the croquet game, in which the birthday girl placed fourth, they all gathered around for the lunch that had been prepared. Her mom brought out her favorite Italian dish, chicken tortellini in mushroom cream sauce. Everyone had been so thoughtful today, Tamara noted. It was times like these when she was glad to have a family. After lunch was the best part- presents. Her parents were the first to give their presents. "We helped a little with some of the other presents," her dad explained, "But these are just from us." He handed her a thin heavy box and a larger, lighter one. She opened the heavy box first, only to find a small laptop computer. Her face lit up as she opened the lid. A screen saver, reading "Happy Birthday" flashed.  
  
"I know I can use this!" she told them. "Thank you." With that, she moved on to the second present. It was a hand carved chess set, beautifully sculpted. It would be perfect to use on a weekend night in their living room on Mars colony. She could just imagine herself back home as she played chess with her dad in front of the fire. She snapped out of her thought only to realize that her uncles were gone. However, her attention turned to her father, who was making another announcement.  
  
"Now, we are going to present you with your birthday present from all of your aunts and uncles," he declared.  
  
"We're all very proud of you, Tamara. In the weeks ahead, you're going to need this." Sally told her. She heard a rumbling noise, and then, she could see Swiftstrike coming towards them. It landed perfectly on the lawn, an extremely large, and brand new, mega cannon in hand. It gleamed in the sun as the sun hit its brilliant silver paint. Tamara was speechless. The huge gun was the most beautiful thing she had ever seen. It looked as if it could destroy anything, probably punch through the Earth's core. The door of Swiftstrike opened, and Lucrezia Noin dropped out of the pilot's compartment.  
  
"That thing is fun!" she remarked. "I haven't been in a mobile suit in years."  
  
"Do you like it?" Catherine asked. Tamara nodded, her eyes wide.  
  
"It's like a work of art. When can I test it out?"  
  
"In a week," came Mariemaia's voice. Tamara turned to face her. "One week, and all troops will be assembled. New OZ is ready to take center stage, and we are going to need that gundam, as well as the others."  
  
"Others?" It was then, that Altron landed, followed by Sandrock, Heavyarms, Deathscythe, and Wing Zero. The rebuilt gundams gleamed in the sunlight, making Tamara grin. The war for peace had begun, and the gundams would be changing the tide. As the pilots of each gundam exited their machine and returned to the group, the 16 year old smiled. This day had been full of surprises.   
  
*  
  
Frustrated, Tamara wanted to hurl her computer across the room. Mariemaia observed, almost laughing at her friend. She listened as her companion ranted on. "This is not what I thought it was going to be like!" the girl complained. "It is so strange, being called 'Your Excellency' by someone 3 times my age! It's really awkward, me giving out all these orders to veterans, who know exactly what they're doing. And I have no clue what to do."  
  
"You've done all right so far," Mariemaia pointed out. "We've reached all our original goals for the organization. And you've been learning quite a bit."  
  
"Being in the military is worse than being a politician! There's more paperwork than there is action!" Tamara countered as she clicked away on her laptop. Today she had letters from practically every congress member, whom all wanted to know if she would support some program or other.  
  
"It will take a lot of patience," Mariemaia replied simply. She knew how Tamara felt. The adjustment had been hard, but Lady Une had prepared her well, and she had been a military leader before. The authority was always tough to handle, especially for someone so young. The young Peacecraft had been holding up well, and was becoming quite a leader. Mariemaia was amazed at how fast she learned and how much she hated the Federation. Once she had Swiftstrike back, Tamara had been fighting with a new zeal and passion.  
  
There were so many people willing to fight for peace under New OZ. Mobile Suit production was going quickly, and the two Commanders were eagerly awaiting the test flights of the new Gemini mobile suits. The Federation had not relented I their attacks, and more firepower was desperately needed. More good news came when Lake Victoria Military Academy reopened to train OZ soldiers. Lucrezia Noin-Peacecraft decided to go back to teaching, but most of the others stayed with Preventer. The once small organization quickly became a powerful group that shaped the politics of the world  
  
It was really rather sad, the older Commander thought to herself, that the conflict has to be solved with the complete annihilation of the Federation. "Peace never comes at a cheap price," Lady Une always used to say. Mariemaia herself had always asked if the price was worth paying, but had never gotten an answer.  
  
  
  
Well, Chapter Eighteen was pretty uneventful. Think of it as the calm before the storm. I will keep working on Chapter Nineteen. Plus, I put up a songfic called "Never Had a Dream Come True" on Fanfiction.net. It focuses more on Tamara's feelings when she finally says goodbye to Calen's spirit. If anyone has any ideas or feelings, please write me a review. Thank you! *_~  



	19. Chapter Nineteen

Chapter Nineteen  
  
It was a long day in the office. Tamara was finishing up with her typed sheets of official orders. Not her favorite part of the new job, but one that she was obliged to do. The 6th Gemini Division was being sent out the very next day to engage in a battle near Belgium. The war was heating up, with both sides sparking the flame of dispute all over the globe. The two young OZ commanders were managing as best they could.  
  
On top of that, Mariemaia was away, supervising the construction of a new mobile suit, a Tallgeese design. She had been adamant on building her own gundam so she could be on the battlefield with her younger counterpart. Commander Khushrenada had been away from the main headquarters of New OZ for over a week, and her desk was starting to pile up with papers. Tamara found herself suddenly doing the work of two. Every once and a while, her dad would come in and visit with her, helping her with some things and giving her some advice.  
  
In the past few days, she felt a strengthened bond with her family. They all seemed to get closer, spending more time together. Her father said that he regretted missing so much of her childhood and wanted to make up for it. Tamara was just glad to have a little help and support. She felt as if she had to grow up so quickly. Her father had said that he had felt the same way as a child. "War does that to people. It ages them and makes them old before their time. It steals their innocence," he had told her. In her heart, she knew he was right. The responsibility and work needed strained her, and she was so tired at the end of the day.  
  
Laying down her pen, she looked over at the picture frame. There were family pictures, pictures of her aunts and uncles, pictures of her and her parents. There was even one of the entire family at a Christmas party on L-4. That was her favorite, because it reminded her of how lucky she was to have a big, loving family. In the corner was tucked a small picture of Calen, his tousled brown hair almost hiding his emerald green eyes that seemed to stare straight into her soul. She laid the photo frame down so she could no longer see the picture. It was so long ago, and yet it seemed like yesterday. She pushed away the old visions easily, remembering the happy times that they shared instead. If only he could be here with her now... Shaking her head, the 16 year old snapped out of her reverie and returned to her task.  
  
Suddenly, there was a knock at her door. "Come in," she called, looking up from her desk. Major Julian Rhodes walked in and promptly saluted. He was the model of military discipline and still rather naive. He was only a few years older than Tamara herself, but she still felt uneasy at his formality. 'At ease, Major," she said, and he relaxed his rigid posture.  
  
"Your Excellency, Commander Khushrenada is not in her office and she has an appointment at this time."  
  
"What type of appointment?" she asked, curious at what kinds of meetings her counterpart held all day. Mariemaia usually handled the meetings, summits, and parties. She seemed to be able to handle the social scene so much better. The redhead had truly inherited the charm of her father.  
  
"It's part of your personal commendation program. In the front lobby is an excellent soldier who has remarkable courage."  
  
"Very well, Major. You may send him in. Who is he, by the way?"  
  
"One of the bravest soldiers and most able pilots we've ever seen, Your Excellency. He has an excellent record of service for the past year. He finished his education at the newly opened Lake Victoria Military Academy. In a battle outside of L-1 colony, his commander was killed in battle and he took control of the unit and led them to an amazing victory. Her Excellency, Commander Khushrenada promoted him directly to Lieutenant, and requested that he receive a commendation." Major Rhodes handed her a manila folder with the Lieutenant's files. She opened it and looked over the last few parts of the records. The man appeared to be an outstanding soldier as well as a brilliant tactical officer.  
  
She was still reading his credentials when he walked in. Tamara could hear the door close and the man approach the desk slowly. "Congratulations on your promotion Lieutenant....Vaughn? She began to tremble, barely able to look up from her stack of papers and files. Taking a few ragged breaths, she looked up, her heart beating frantically. His emerald green eyes locked with hers, boring deep into her soul and pulling out all the things she had been hiding for so long. Tamara's heart seemed to stop as he stared at her.  
  
"It's been 1 year, eleven moths and four days, Your Excellency," he said, his voice as soft and kind as always. Tamara felt as if he were a ghost, something her mind had made up to torture her with. At last, she found her voice.  
  
"You're dead," she stated simply, as if he knew that already.  
  
"Not quite, Arisze," he said, using her old nickname. That of all things seem to reassure her of the reality of this moment. She realized then that she had been hoping for this moment and that she had not lost track of those days either. The 16 year old stood and walked towards him. He seemed so real, just the way she remembered him. Tears began to seep out, one rogue tear rolling down her cheek. He reached out to brush it away, his gloved hand brushing her cheek. That's when the reality hit her.  
  
"I watched you die," she tried. "How did you get here?" Calen had an answer like he always did. They crossed over to the bench and cleared the papers off it so they could sit down.  
  
"I remember the walls and ceiling falling so suddenly. And I remember what I said to you. And then, I don't remember anything. What I do remember is waking up in a hospital and not knowing where I was." His face was solemn as he recounted what had happened.  
  
"Why didn't you try to find me?" Tamara asked, her heart filled with new questions.  
  
"They said that you were dead, Tamara. You disappeared from the Academy, and when I awoke, they told me that they hadn't recovered your body yet. I spent so many days trying to get over that. When they said that you were dead, I began to feel so empty. He paused, clearly remembering things from long ago. How could he make her understand what he had gone through to get here. How could he describe all the anger, the fear, the grief, the self blame that he had experienced for so many months. And on top of that...  
  
"I was with my parents on B1340232 for a while. But the Federation couldn't leave us alone for long. They came to our neighborhood, Tamara. Their battles with the public destroyed my family, my home. I've lost everything I've ever known to them. I lost my parents, I lost you... There was no army I could fight in, nowhere I could go. So I began to design a new gundam, one I could use to take my revenge. And then, you made your speech as the Princess of the Sanc Kingdom. And I dedicated myself to finding you again. When New OZ was created, it was too perfect. I joined and completed my training at the rebuilt Lake Victoria Academy. It wasn't the same without you."  
  
"It wasn't the same without you, either, Calen. How can I begin to tell you what I felt like? I can't even describe all the anger, the fear, the grief, and the overwhelming self blame. You told me not to hide my feelings, so here they are," she said, losing her composure.  
  
"I feel the same," he said simply. "And you feel as if you can never be whole again. You just don't want to accept the fact that the only other person that made you whole is gone. So you let yourself get angry and do things you regret. I tried to take matters into my own hands, and I killed innocent people. And that made me no better than them." Despite the circumstances, Tamara let out a bitter laugh.  
  
"After all this time, we still can read each other like books. We still feel the same about everything." After that, they just sat there for the longest time, neither one of them asking questions. Nothing needed to be said, the two teens just sat there, thinking about what had happened. It was so surreal. After a few hours, Major Rhodes came knocking on the door.  
  
"Your Excellency? Commander Khushrenada is returning and would like to speak with you," he said respectfully. Tamara sighed and looked away from Calen.  
  
"I guess you should leave," she said simply. They got up and walked over to the door. "Perhaps we could schedule another meeting, Lieutenant," she said as she opened the door. Her face wore a sad smile that widened as he gave her one of his trademarks, a quirky grin that she remembered so well. He saluted and left, leaving her feeling as I she were in the middle of the strangest dream. "I should have known that you wouldn't leave me for long," she whispered as she watched him go.  
  
Mariemaia entered Tamara's office shortly after Calen left. She was smiling from ear to ear, full of news about the Tallies Four's construction. The 24 year old leader was in a positive mood, happier than she had been in a long time. The vacation had been nice, giving her time to cool down after so much busy work. When she came into the younger girl's office, she found her sitting and looking out the window. "It's nice to see you again, Tamara. How have things been holding up?"  
  
Tamara answered her question with a question. "How long have you known about Calen Vaughn?" she asked from behind her chair. Mariemaia grew worried and spun the chair around. The sixteen year old girl was sitting in the chair, her face a mask of emotions that she was trying desperately to keep in.   
  
"I've known about him for some time. He's the first double graduate of Victoria. Was he in your class? I'm sorry that you had to take that meeting. I originally had him scheduled for when I got back, but the appointment got changed. Did something happen, Tamara?" She was curious as to the reason behind Tamara's demeanor.  
  
"Mariemaia, I used to know Calen Vaughn. He was my best friend, the only one who was ever kind to me. When the mobile suits came, I thought he was dead. I watched him slip into a coma. And now, he just shows up on my door!" She was beginning o get angry, but tried to stop herself. No anger, he would remind her. And now he was here to remind her. He was really alive. "I'm sorry," she said, composing herself. "I jsut don't know anything about what's been going on."  
  
"Well, I did have some agents investigate his background. Would you like to hear the report?" Tamara nodded, so Mariemaia began. "He's a Vaughn, obviously. A long way back, Andrew Vaughn was a pacifist leader for the colonies. He was assassinated not long after Heero Yuy. His younger son is thought to be dead, and the older son, Kevin Vaughn went into the military. There, he met Ana Meadows. When the Eve Wars came, they joined White Fang, Ana as an officer and Kevin as an engineer. They got off of Libra before it blew, and soon after the whole ordeal, Calen Vaughn was born on..."  
  
"June 26th, After Colony 196. Labor was 19 hours long and ended with a c-section. He was 18 inches long and weighed 7 pounds, 4 ounces," finished Tamara. Mariemaia sat amazed at this display of knowledge. "What I want to know is what has been happening in the past few years."  
  
"Well," the amazed young woman started again, "most of the trouble in his background started after the Federation attacked his home colony and his parents were killed. After that, he stole a Federation Taurus suit, and began to wreak havoc on all military outposts in space. They say that he attacked with a vengeance, striking quickly and leaving no survivors. After our announcement about New OZ, he went back to Lake Victoria Military Academy for training and became one of the first an most talented graduates. He was placed directly in the Specials and quickly climbed through the ranks. A top notch soldier, really. You really knew him well didn't you?"  
  
"More than you can ever know, Mariemaia. I don't even know how to start. I really don't want to talk about it now." She turned back to the window, an almost wistful look on her face. The older girl looked over at her partner, who appeared to be on the verge of a breakdown. She bowed her head and turned to leave. Tamara had her own ghosts to face. The best thing to do would be to let her sort out her feelings. Things would resolve themselves with time, and in the meantime, she would be able to train a wonderfully capable Lieutenant. He had excellent potential and a quite interesting background. She had plans for him. Such a soldier was an invaluable resource...  
  
Surprise, surprise, loyal readers! You didn't really think I could actually get rid of Calen, did you? I, personally, think he's just too sweet to kill. So he's baaack! Besides, I couldn't have Tamara without Calen It's like eggs without bacon, shoes without shoelaces, computers without the internet, fanfiction.net without the fanfics! PLEASE send me your comments and reviews. Hope you enjoyed the chapter!  
~Chryseis Dione  



	20. Chapter Twenty

Chapter Twenty  
  
  
Lucrezia Noin-Peacecraft walked into the New OZ headquarters in search of her daughter. The building was filled with people in the dark blue officers' uniforms, bustling around the halls after reporting to the Commanders. She thought she recognized a few from her days as an OZ lieutenant. At last, she came to the main offices. A secretary sat outside at her desk, seemingly busy with paperwork. "Anita?" she asked curiously, looking at the familiar face of the woman.  
  
  
"Noin! Is it you?" Anita stood to get a good look at her old friend. "I haven't seen you since we graduated. How have you been?"  
  
  
"It's a long story. Lots of things have happened since we graduated." She gestured towards Tamara's office and Anita gave her a sympathetic smile.  
  
  
"I know how you feel. I have two of my own at home. Although, I always suspected that something was going to happen between you and Zechs Merquise. It's like someone threw you two into a blender. She's very nice and awfully quiet. Unlike you at the academy, she teased.  
  
  
Noin laughed, remembering the way she used to be before she saw battles. "I need to see Tamara for a while, if I can. Is she busy?"  
  
  
Anita looked on her computer. "She had an appointment with Lieutenant Vaughn a little bit ago, but I think she should be done by now. You can just go on in. You are her mother, after all." Noin gave her old friend a friendly smile and started over to the office. From inside, she could hear strange noises. There were clicks and twangs inside the office, followed by giggles and excited whispers.  
  
  
"Ha! Beat that!" came a male voice from inside the office. A twang and a thwack came, followed by the sounds of a very exultant young girl.  
  
  
"I could beat you blindfolded," she said. Noin pushed her way into the office. Her daughter quickly hit the cord to the blinds and dropped what she had been holding behind her desk. Her male companion put the object behind his back and stood at attention. Noin also did not fail to notice a glass vase of lovely mauve colored flowers on her daughter's desk. "Hello, Mom. What are you doing here?" Tamara said quickly.  
  
  
"Instructor Noin," Calen said, saluting with one hand. The older woman surveyed the two's guilty faces. She moved her eyes from the hand behind their backs to the floor beside the window, where several Nerf darts were scattered.  
  
  
"Tamara, I love the view from the window up here. Why don't you keep it open?" she said, knowing what the reaction would be.  
  
  
"No, it's fine, Mom," Tamara began, jumping in front of her. "I want the windows closed today." But it was too late. Her mom reached for the cord and pulled open the blinds. On the window was a bullseye marked out with the remnants of what appeared to be sticky notes. There was a single dart in the dead center and one right next to it still attached to the wall. The two teens looked rather sheepish as the older woman surveyed the scene.  
  
  
Noin smiled and looked over at the two. "So this is why you've been in your office alone for so long," she perused.  
  
  
"Terribly sorry, Instructor," Calen apologized quickly, giving Tamara a glance that said 'Same time tomorrow?'  
  
  
"I'll keep in touch with you, Lieutenant. Dismissed," the sixteen year old called after him as he left hurriedly, dropping the dart gun on Tamara's desk. Tamara turned to her mother and looked a little embarrassed. "Mom! Don't just come in and scare me like that!"  
  
  
"What? You don't want to know that you're in here shirking your duties and playing darts with one of your own lieutenants? So, you seem to be pretty friendly towards him..." her mother began.  
  
  
"It's not like that!" the girl laughed. "Mom, Calen was one of my friends from a long time ago." Her mother nodded and looked into her daughter's eyes. She was telling the truth, Noin decided. It was probably healthy for her to have friends. The poor girl had been living such a strange life for the past few years. She deserved a little happiness.  
  
  
"I have a few days off from my teaching position, so I thought that I would come up and stay here for a few days. Your dad's back too. He's been so eager to see how you've been doing." Noin couldn't retrain herself from giving her daughter a hug. The once small and delicate girl was shooting up. By now, she was as tall as her mother. She was going to be tall, like her father. "These are nice flowers," she said, smelling the fragrant bouquet on her daughter's desk. "Are they from the Lieutenant?" She gave looked over at Tamara, raising one eyebrow, which made the girl laugh.  
  
  
"You can be so silly sometimes," Tamara sighed. "What's wrong with Calen bringing me flowers? He just wanted to make up for missing my birthday."  
  
  
"You two were pretty close at the academy, weren't you?" Noin asked. Tamara collapsed in her chair behind her desk.  
  
  
"He was my best friend, Mom," she looked up at her mom, who was perched on the edge of the desk where there were no papers or files. "I lied to you guys for a long time, saying that I had lots of friends. I was so lonely at school." This took Noin by surprise.  
  
  
"You lied to us? Why would you do that? If you were unhappy, Tamara, we would have come and gotten you out of there," she told her daughter. The fact that the girl felt that she had to lie to her disturbed Noin. Tamara just nodded.  
  
  
"All I dreamed of back then was having friends, and telling you about my new friends made it seem real. But then I met Calen, and he showed me what a friend is. He was the one who designed Swiftstrike. We were going to build them and fight to protect the Sanc Kingdom. And then the Federation came..." She closed her eyes, chasing away the memories that threatened to return. "Do you know what it feels like to lose the only friend you've ever had?"  
  
  
Noin knew the answer to that question. She remembered those dark days after the Eve Wars of AC 195. All the despair, seeing Libra explode over and over again in her mind. Hearing that single word before everything went to chaos. 'Lucrezia......' She snapped back into the present, only to see her daughter looking strangely at her. "So you two are just friends?" she prodded, trying to lighten the mood.  
  
  
"Best friends," came the reply.  
  
  
"Good. I'd better go get your father before he investigates and interrogates the Lieutenant." Tamara smiled a bit, her gloomy mood improving. "You know, for having a daughter who's in the middle of a universal war, he's awfully overprotective," Noin continued. "I think he's more afraid of you dating than you going into battle with the Federation."  
  
  
"I don't plan on dating any time soon," came the quick reply. "Why don't we go home? I'd really like to see Dad again." She grabbed her briefcase and got up to leave. "Aren't you coming, Mom?"  
  
  
"I'll be right there. You go on and hop in the car," Noin called over to her. The blond girl left, leaving Noin alone in the office. As soon as she was out of sight, Noin snatched the small card lying by the flowers. She felt a little guilty about reading her daughter's mail, but she was curious about Calen Vaughn. He had been an excellent student at the academy, bright and skilled at piloting. As a mother, she wondered what the nature of the relationship was, and if her daughter was indeed telling the truth.  
  
  
She opened the card, not finding what she had expected. A small drawing dropped out. Noin looked at the drawing, which appeared o be a picture of a gundam. "Happy Belated Birthday," the card read in curvy letters. Below the main text was a quick note, penned in black ink with neat cursive letters. "I'm sorry I missed your big day, so maybe this will make up for it. I thought that I would get you ariszes instead of roses, so I hope that's okay. The gundam is for you too. We'll work together on it, just like old times. Happy birthday from your best friend." Noin smiled. She remembered things like these from a long time ago. Like the poinsettia that miraculously showed up in her dorm room after the first Christmas with her best friend. Smiling, she left the office. There was nothing to worry about here.  
  
  
*  
  
  
At the Peacecraft mansion, Zechs and Heero were desperately rushing around the kitchen. "Next time you get an idea, Yuy, keep it to yourself," Zechs grumbled as he surveyed the kitchen. The kitchen at the palace was a total mess, with batter, sauce, and ingredients everywhere. In the oven, the chicken was cooking, the odor of garlic coming from it. A very strong odor of garlic, in fact. The tall blond pilot was working on what was supposed to have been a caramel custard dish. "I've seen Lu do this a million times," he complained. "And it just doesn't look right."   
  
  
Heero, on the other hand, was watching the rice very carefully. He had almost forgotten about it for a while and the pot had boiled over, sending hot water everywhere. This dinner was not exactly what he had planned. "It was your idea to have a big dinner for them," he said to the other man.  
  
  
"Yes, but it was your 'great idea' to cook it ourselves. Lu and Relena are going to have a fit when they see this kitchen."   
  
  
"We'd better have it clean by the time they get home, then," Heero answered calmly, stirring the rice again.  
  
  
"Yuy, they will be here as soon as they pick up Relena! We don't have that much time!" No sooner had he said that, than they heard three voices. The two pilots desperately began tearing off the aprons that they had been wearing and hurried out before the women came in and saw what they had done in the kitchen.  
  
  
"Dad? Are you here?" called Tamara, looking around. Zechs snuck up behind her, gesturing to Noin and Relena to be quiet. He grabbed her from behind, lifted her up and swung her around. She laughed, all the while mumbling, "Put me down!" Her father finally complied, trying to catch his breath.  
  
  
"You're getting too big to do that," he commented, still breathing hard. "I used to be able to toss you up in the air." Tamara smiled and followed her dad to the old dining room.  
  
  
"What are we doing?" Relena asked, noting the direction that Zechs was taking them. Her brother didn't say a word, but he pushed open the doors to the dining room. All three girls gasped at the sight. It was dark, except for the candles lit all along the table. The places had been hastily set, and the food was not yet out and ready. "Oh Milliardo! You guys made dinner?" gasped Relena. Noin began to laugh lightly at that.  
  
  
"You? Cook? If I recall correctly, the last thing you cooked were..."  
  
  
"Please don't tell this one again," he pleaded. It was so embarrassing the way his wife, a natural cook loved to torment him for his lack of culinary skills.  
  
  
"The little bunny pancakes!" Tamara and Noin chimed in unison, both of them laughing. "I remember that! We ran out of those little frozen dinners that you used to make and freeze for him to heat up." The blond pilot rolled his eyes and excused himself. The girls were still laughing among themselves as they sat down, no doubt they were sharing more tales about his misfortunes cooking.  
  
  
In the kitchen was a very curious sight. Heero, who was normally calm suddenly ran away from the stove and over to the sink. He threw what appeared to be a flaming pot holder into the sink, only to have it ignite a wooden cooking spoon. Careful to avoid the flames, he flipped the water on and doused the fire. Zechs stood back, amazed at the man who had been handling himself quite well thus far. "You touched the pot holder to the heating element, didn't you?" he asked him.  
  
  
"Hn..." Heero growled, looking down at the scorched potholder and spoon in disgust. That stupid chicken! The garlic smell was quite overpowering at first, and he had foolishly lost his grip on the hot pad. At least he had not burned himself this time. Smoke filled the kitchen as Heero went back to his chicken. "It should be ready now," he told the other man simply. They both arranged the food on trays and carried it in. The girls were still laughing about something. Zechs and Heero gave each other a look that agreed not to tell the girls about what had happened in the kitchen.  
  
  
  
More chapters to come! What is the gundam drawing that Noin found in the card? Have any ideas, opinions, or just comments? Send me a review or write to me at Chryseisd@aol.com. Thank you!  



	21. Chapter Twenty-One

Chapter Twenty-One  
  
Trayan Octera sat calmly in his office, stirring his tea with the silver spoon. Looking around, he contemplated the plans set by his General Octera. The boy did not think of Garret Octera as his father, only as the commander. After all, he hadn't know him until recently. Trayan's mother had raised him on Colony L5-29761. When she had died, Trayan had gone to find his father, and unfortunately, he found him.  
  
He could think back and remember his childhood sometimes. His mother had had the same strong will, the same cleverness in her eyes. She also, as he recalled, was pale and delicate, not like him at all. Much to his displeasure, Trayan looked much like his father. It must have been quite embarrassing for his unmarried mother to have child bearing a resemblance to a popular military officer. It was not an affair, but was not something the family was proud of. They had cast out his mother to live on her own and support her child. And when she died, her 7 year old son was left to fend for himself.  
  
Now, he was the ghostly advisor to the head of the Federation. The General did not want to admit his son's existence, but allowed him to become the power behind the Federation forces. It would be his mistake in the end, since Trayan had no intention of remaining second in command. Perhaps it was the Octera ambition, or perhaps it was the thirst for conquest that Zero system had introduced him to. Whatever the reason, he had his own plans.  
  
Triton had been fully repared and ready to make a debut soon. Trayan was looking forward to fighting in the gundam again, although he wasn't sure what he was going to do with it. Perhaps he could engage in a duel with Arisze again. That was always entertaining. However, he suspected that Swiftstrike had a new pilot, since it's attacks were different. As he thought of this, ironically, he received a transmision over his vid screen. "We've been attacked. There's a lot....." The screen went fuzzy as the transmission was lost. Trayan got out of his chair. "At last, some action," he mumbled to himself as he left the office.  
  
The soldier who had given the transmission had been in a routine check during their blockade of L-3. Suddenly, a huge, dark gundam appeared in front of the troops. Then, out of nowhere, came an unidentified moble suit. It spread it's delicate silver wings, revealing the main body of the new gundam. It was a pure white, with silver accents that looked like sparkling stars. The head seemed to be wearing a silver mask as well as a huge and intricate silver headpiece. There were missile blocks on both arms, ready to be deployed. The soldier directly contacted the line that reached the Federation Headquarters. However, the huge white and silver gundam drew out a sickle-scythe. Within moments, the soldier was no longer able to make a transmission.  
  
The gundams set upon the masses of Leos surrounding the colony. Neo-Heavyarms came up from the bottom of the Leos and attacked with its double gatling guns. Swiftstrike darted in and out, cloaking, slashing and flying back to get a shot at the enemy suits with it's blaster rifle. The newer gundam joined suit, pulling out it's white and silver buster rifle. "Ha ha! Back together and better than ever!" called Calen over the intercom in Gundam 07. "How's Nova working for you?"  
  
"It's great! This thing handles like a dream!" Tamara replied, adjusting her silver mask. She was in her element in the new gundam. Elegant and perfect for inlicting heavy damage on her enemies, she was enjoing gundam 08. She and Calen had designed it together, taking into account the weaknesses of Triton as well as the advantages and weaknesses of the enemy mobile suits. It had been Tamara's choice of coloring. The silver was like the stars of space, and white not only symbolizing the moon, but peace itself.  
  
The fight appeared to be in their favor, until a shadow was cast across the battlefield. Triton had arrived. Drawing his blue trident, he assumed the battle stance. "Well, Arisze, we meet again." His calm voice resonated from the communicator. Inside her cockpit, Tamara's triumphant mood turned bitter. So the traitor had returned.... She scowled and prepard for a duel.  
  
"Calen, leave him to me. We have a score to settle." With great distaste, she glared over at the young man who had betrayed her trust a few years ago. "So, Octera, you've come slithering back ontop the battle field. Did Daddy fix your gundam?"  
  
"You're a bit hostile. And don't call me Octera. Is this what I get for coming back to visit an old friend?" he mocked.  
  
"You are hardly my friend, traitor," she said, making the first move. Her scythe clashed with his trident, and the battle began. They dispensed with the traditional opening, shooting at each other with blaster rifles, and started straight into the hand to hand combat.  
  
"I've been longing for another chance to fight you," Trayan admitted as swung his trident. "My offer for you still holds."  
  
"The only answer you'll be getting," she yelled, countering his blows, "is the fury of the Deathflower."  
  
"Ah, but Deathflower, you would be so well suited to the Federation. And after the coup, a soldier like yourself will be needed. I assure you, with me at the head of the Federation, things will be much different."  
  
"Your mission would still be to destroy peace. And I won't let that happen anymore. The Federation has haunted me all my life, giving me my scars, taking away my best friend, killing his mother. But I'm not going to let you destroy more lives on your quest for domination. The gundams will stop you, Octera. We will stop you and your father." She jabbed and thrusted, fighting with him as fiercely as she could. He was always mocking her like this. She would rather self destruct than work for the Federation ever again. She had served their ends once, she would not be so foolish again. Trayan was a manipulator, a trickster. He had betrayed her trust and led her into making machines of mass destruction. What was worse, he convinced her to use them for evil purposes. And now the world was at war with itself, with the colonies caught in the middle. Al she could do now was fight to protect them.  
  
"One shouldn't fight when they're upset. They might lose control," the other pilot taunted. He jabbed at her with the trident so quickly that it almost caught Gundam Nova in the chest. Just in time, Tamara twisted to the side and maneuvered her gundam's arm, bringing the sicle-scythe down on Triton's weapon arm. Trayan pulled back a little. "Good move, Arisze," he complimented mockingly. This enraged the young girl and she flew at him with a fury. Twisting, jabbing, sparring, and then flying back before diving into the fray again, the two gundams fought their way across space, ranging all around the air space of the L-3 colony.  
  
"Tamara! We've got company!" called Calen over the radio. Tamara frowned and looked over towards Triton with disgust. She could see masses of mobile suits come in, getting out their laser cannons. She should have known that she couldn't have a fair duel with an Octera..  
  
"You really do play dirty. You demand a one on one duel and then send in troops to finish us off. Octera, you are not even worth fighting." She broke off the duel to go help her friends, who were very busy holding off the masses of mbile suits. Disappointed, Trayan watched her speed off.  
  
" I hope we duel again, Arisze. And when we do, you will find that I am not like my father. I give no second chances." He jetted back, watching in amusement as the three gundams tore throught the Leos and Aries sent to back him up. His foolish father still believed that there was power in numbers. With all the mobile suits around, it was nearly impossible to have a decent, honorable duel with anyone. Although taunting her had been great fun, he decided that his owrk was done. With a last look at he battlefield, he jetted away, grinning to himself. "One day, Arisze, I will be the victor."  
  
The rest of the mobile suits were beginning to overwhelm the three gundams. In the nick of time, a voice came over the radio. "You guys need a little back-up?" came Quatre's soft voice. Tamara looked over and spotted Neo-Sandrock making its way towards them, followed by two others. "I rounded up some more help."  
  
"Are you in over your head?" came Zechs's voice from the Tallgeese III.  
  
"Trying to start the party without me?" followed Duo's voice. The cavalry had arrived! Deathscythe and company were jumping right into the fray, cleaving through the mobile suits with relative ease. Tamara was amazed at the precision and ability that the older pilots still had. It must have been tough to retrain themselves after all these years. She heard Duo's triumphant shouts through the intercom as he jetted around in Deathscythe, cloaking and attacking with a vengeance."The great Shinigami is back in business, he crowed. The young girl laughed to see her uncles and her father back in their element once more.  
  
After help arrived, it didn't take long to take care of the rest of the mobile suits. The six mobile suits jetted away from the battlefield together, returning to Earth. "So, these are your uncles," Calen said, snapping on Tamara's vidphone. "They're just like you described them."  
  
"Great, aren't they?" she answered happily.  
  
"They're lifesavers. When can I meet them all in person?"  
  
She laughed as she only did with him. "You really want to meet my family?"  
  
"Why not? Are you afraid they will scare me off?"  
  
"No. I'm just worried that Dad will get his "I'm-a-Preventer-and-I'll-know-exactly-what-you-do-with-my-daughter" thing. And then it will get weird, and everyone will be worried, have suspicions."  
  
"Are you embarrassed of me, Tamara?" he joked. She finally quit laughing.  
  
"Of course not. Do you want to come to Thanksgiving with us?"  
  
"I accept your invitation. You going to tell your family about this? It's not like we're having an affair or anything," he stated. In her gundam Tamara blushed as her dad called to her over her intercom.  
  
"Are you alright, Tamara?" Zechs asked. She had fought well out there. He reluctantly admitted to himself that this was where she belonged. Tamara was going to forge her own path, not walk his. And that was the way it should be.  
  
"I'm fine," she responded. Then, more hesitantly, "Dad, I have something to tell you."  
  
  
Well, that's all for now. Maybe once my play is done I will have more time to write! Stay tuned for more installments later. Please send me your criticisms, comments or ideas at chrysiesd@aol.com Thanks! 


	22. Chapter Twenty-Two

Chapter Twenty-Two  
  
Sally Po lay quietly in her position. Any minute, now, Garret Octera would be returning from his meeting. L-5's Federation militarists were welcoming him as one of the wars greatest heroes. It made Preventer Water almost ill to watch the way he was received. He had his own type of charisma, winning many people over. But his reign of destruction would be over soon. She smoothed her hand over her pistol. Soon, the war would be over.  
  
She was positioned in his office in the embassy, waiting for the dictator. The night was cool, the breeze blowing in from the open window. Sally grinned to herself. She would be back at the little house on the other side of the colony before the week was out. Her fellow Preventer agent was waiting for her there.  
  
"Preventer Water, I presume," came a low voice. Sally looked up from her hiding place to see the tall, dark haired man looking over at her. He moved silently towards her. staring down at the barrel of her gun, which was pointed at his head.  
  
"You're not leaving here alive, Octera. Your days of destruction are over," Sally spat, as she stood. She straightened out, stretching for the first time in hours. Her pistol was steady in her hands, ready to fire on the man that had caused so much chaos on Earth and on the colonies.  
  
"Are you going to shoot me, lady? I think you won't, not with the information I have for you," he taunted, in his cocky, confident manner. "I'm just surprised that you Preventers aren't aware of what is going on. You're supposed to be the spies of the Alliance." He crossed over to her, putting his hand on his own gun, and flipping it out and pointing it at her.  
  
Sally glared at him with measured curiosity. Should she entertain him or blow him away? He might have valuable information, and if she didn't believe him, she could always use her weapon. "Speak your piece, Octera. It may buy you some time."  
  
The tall man began to speak, his voice tinged with a bit of fear. He went slowly, trying to prolong his speech as long as possible, or at least until he thought of a plan. "You Preventers are very thorough, but there are a few things that you are looking over. First, I am not the man you want."  
  
"You're the Federation High Commander, Octera. You're the one giving the orders. Do you have any idea how many people you've killed for your ideals of war?"  
  
"Those who have died have not died in vain, I assure you. But they will if my youngest advisor is allowed to follow through with is plans." Now, he had her full attention. Her Preventer instincts made her edgy  
  
"According to my spies, one of my closest advisors is planning a coup d'etat to overthrow me. He always did have ambition, and it seems that he also has a large group of followers. It's a pity to have to get rid of him now, he's so cunning. Trayan makes all the plans for the Federation, he's in charge of most tactical maneuvers, our resident gundam pilot. I suppose he's no longer content with being second in command." It truly was a pity that he could not trust his own son. But trusting someone got you killed or hurt. He had trusted Hazouri, and she had betrayed his trust. She had cursed him, blamed him, and hated him when their son had arrived. Her family had been infuriated, as had she. He had placed all his trust and love in her for that short time. But now, she was gone, and her son was beyond his reach.  
  
He completely changed the subject from then on, which took Sally aback. Something was definitely wrong. "So, you're all proud of your princess, aren't you?"  
  
"What do you want, Octera?"  
  
He could keep toying with this woman or he could drop the news and see how she took it. He grinned to himself. The latter would be much more entertaining. "Trayan and your precious Tamara have been meeting all week. Did it ever occur to you that they have been working together? The respected princess and the boy no one knows, planning to take over the world. Trayan will take over Federation, Tamara will take over the Alliance, and together, they plan to rule the world. It's a pity that the won't survive to see their dream come true."  
  
"Noooooo," came a shout as someone fell out of the duct overhead, rolling to the ground and somersaulting to aim their gun at Octera. The brown haired, green eyed youth stared angrily at the Federation's supreme commander. "You're telling lies Octera. And if you keep this up, I'll kill you. And I won't need this gun."  
  
"Well, well, well, Calen Vaughn. Ana's son, no? So, she has got you wrapped around her finger as well? And you really do trust her? It's really so sweet, and yet so pathetic."  
  
"Mock me, and I may just shoot you. Mock her and I will kill you with my bare hands. She has been a loyal friend for years, and I won't abandon her. She didn't abandon me, and I certainly won't let you say these things," he spat, glaring at his opponent.  
  
The boy could be trouble, and he could have fun with him for a while. So this was a Vaughn, hmmm. Spies were wonderful things, and he thanked the gods for them. "You know, you resemble someone." He appeared to ponder for a while. "I know. You look just like Michael Vaughn. Your uncle, I believe. Perhaps piloting runs in your blood. It is rather ironic though. You never really did have the Vaughn Prussian blue eyes. Perhaps you also don't have the legendary Vaughn immortality." Both of the opposing people dropped to the ground, felled by blows to the back of the head by two Special Services guards.  
  
"Take them to the cells, but don't lock them up too badly. Let them escape and think themselves to be clever."  
  
"Yes sir," one replied, saluting. They dragged the prisoners out. As they left the room, one soldier looked at the other. "Is it me, or is he getting worse and worse each day."  
  
*  
  
Sally Po awoke lying outside the compound on the colony. On the edge of the hill stood Calen Vaughn, a boy that she had only known since Thanksgiving. The information was just sinking in with her as well. The Heero Yuy that they all knew...a Vaughn? Andrew Vaughn had been a pacifist, she had never known that he had two sons. So this was Heero's nephew. If she looked over at him, she could almost see it. How ironic that they should find out this way.  
  
"Calen! We'd better get back to Earth! We have a serious investigation to run," she called. This would totally screw up her vacation. She was hoping for a little time alone with her partner, but it looked like work would interfere once again.  
  
"An investigation of Tamara? Are you really going to believe what that piece of trash tells you?" His voice held an unimaginable amount of contempt in it.  
  
"We have to investigate at least. There may be some truth to Octera's words. Although I doubt that Tamara has anything to do with this."  
  
"She's not like that, Sally. She doesn't think like that. It's not her style to do a secretive takeover from the inside. If she decides to change loyalties, everyone will know."  
  
"You really do know her, don't you?"  
  
"We understand each other," came the reply. She glanced over at him. He still had a pained look on his face. "We'd better be going if we want to get back to Earth in time," he said, moving on from the painful subject that they had been avoiding. She nodded, following him towards the shuttle station. This war just kept getting more and more complicated with every day.  
  
  
There's the next chapter. And the plot thickens again! It has now reached a sludgy consistency I guess. I can finally start writing again now that I have less and less play practice! Hurray! Anyway, you know the drill, feel free to send comments and constructive criticism to chryseisd@aol.com  



	23. Chapter Twenty-Three

Chapter Twenty Three  
  
  
Heero walked up to the house nervously. He had a death grip on Relena's hand as he approached the house. They were approaching the Winner mansion on L-4 colony. It was Christmas and he was trying to remember how he got talked into going here. He had been looking forward to some time alone for once, but no, they had to go and spend time with family. The door to the dreaded manor swung open, Quatre's smiling face greeting them.  
  
There was the wonderful smell of turkey emanating from the back of the house. Inside, there were festive decorations that seemed to proclaim that Christmas was near. Heero calmed down slightly until he heard a noise. "Meow." A white cat rubbed up against his leg, purring. The Perfect Soldier leapt swiftly up onto a chair, searching for a gun somewhere. He glared at the cat fearfully, wondering if it could jump up near him. Suddenly, he heard people burst out laughing. He glared over at Duo, Hilde, Zechs, and Noin, who were all laughing hysterically at his reaction to the cat. Even Quatre chuckled a bit.  
  
"Sorry about that, Heero," he apologized picking up the cat. "I forgot that you were afraid of cats. Angel is a nice kitty. She loves everybody." He stroked the white cat's fur, causing it to purr. Relena walked over to stroke the cat too.  
  
"Traitor," Heero mumbled, climbing off his chair. He advanced towards the living room, where there were more sensible people. He went to go in, but he saw a sight that frightened him. There were two more cats in the living room. A calico was sleeping underneath the Christmas tree. One black cat was toying with the ribbons on a package and another was curled up on Trowa while he played cards with Wufei, Sally, and Calen. "So...many...cats..." he mumbled, terrified. Why had he let Relena talk him into this?  
  
Later, most of the part was gathered in the living room. A few people were finishing up the final preparations on dinner. Tamara came in just in time to see her father and Heero involved in an extremely competitive game of chess. Both men wore frighteningly solemn looks on their faces, glaring down at the chess board. It took them forever to make a move, and when they did, it was made very carefully. She smiled to herself as she watched them. After all those years, they were still the same.  
  
Sitting down to play with Angel, Sandy, and Arwyn, she watched the chess game. The cats pounced and rolled around as she drew the ribbon across the floor. They scuffled and shoved, each trying to pounce on it and prove that they were the fiercest and strongest. Even Angel was after the string, which made Tamara laugh. She had wanted a cat, but Aunt Relena had said no. From Heero's reaction to the felines, she understood why. "Having fun?" came a voice from behind her. Calen sat down beside her, watching her uncle with interest.  
  
"Yeah," she said. "You have to admit, Christmas with our family is fun."  
  
"Thanks again for inviting me. I was planning on spending today on duty." He looked around the room, taking everything in. It felt so much like home here. Everyone was so close, even if they didn't have any blood ties. He looked once more at the man who Octera said was his father's brother. From what Tamara said, he was an honorable man and a good soldier. He could almost believe the Federation leader's words about his family. Or perhaps he simply longed for a family of his own enough to believe anything.  
  
He couldn't have imagined a better Christmas than this. After the Thanksgiving dinner had gone off well, Tamara made sure that he could come to L-4 for the holiday season since he didn't have anywhere else to go. She was always great like that, always making him feel welcome in her family. After he had faced thorough lectures from several uncles and aunts, he had been accepted into the 'Gundam' family, as Tamara called it.  
  
"Checkmate," came a low and solemn voice from near the Christmas tree. Heero glared at the other man.  
  
"You may have won this time, Merquise, but I will beat you next time."  
  
"I believe that you said that last time we played," he mocked. The two glared at each other. "Rematch?" Noin walked up behind Zechs, still wearing her apron.  
  
"Are you two getting along? I don't want to have to put you to work washing dishes." The two men looked rather sheepish for a few seconds, and then went in separate directions. Tamara suppressed the urge to laugh out loud at the way they acted. Her mom looked down at her. "You two ready to eat? We have dinner all ready."  
  
"That sounds great, Mom. I'll get everyone rounded up," Tamara replied, going off to tell everyone. It wasn't hard to round them all up. Most of them were in the living room with the exception of Heero, who was keeping away from the cats. Even the dining room had festive decorations, complete with red and green table wear. Calen was amazed at the sights he saw. All along a table in the back was an amazing assortment of food. "Don't look so amazed," Tamara whispered to Calen. "You'd be surprised how quickly it all goes between eighteen people." The table was covered in food, including turkey, pasta, rice, rolls, more vegetables than he could count, fruit salads, jells, and desserts, the most tempting of which was a gigantic tiramisu.  
  
"Your mom made the tiramisu, didn't she?" Calen asked his friend. Noin made the best Italian food he had ever tasted. He would never forget the time that she brought them dinner one night when they were both working late on plans for the next wave of attacks to defend Belgium. He closed his eyes, remembering the dish his mother always used to make. Stroganoff, it was called. Passed down on from his mother's grandmother, and on through the ages. But she would never fix it for him any more, never again comfort him when he thought that he couldn't stand life alone anymore.  
  
They all grabbed food and sat down around the table. While munching on turkey, farfalle pasta, sweet potatoes, and tiramisu, they conversed with each other about various topics, some of which were business related and others that were not. Calen reveled in the many conversations, hearing bits and pieces of each one. Dinner with the huge family was rather chaotic, but always entertaining. Tamara was enjoying herself as well. She got to talk with Dorothy, an aunt that she rarely saw.  
  
As they finished up dessert, Zechs turned his attention to Calen. "So, are you enjoying Christmas?" he asked civily. He had sworn to his daughter that he would not interrogate him this time. He had asked him numerous questions and thoroughly interrogated the young man on his intentions. After an hour or so of grilling, it was rather obvious that the two only wished to be friends. Preventer Wind was satisfied. His daughter would not date until she was at least 19 or 20 if he had his way. How else could he explain it to other people? She was his little girl, his redemption. She was the one that he bounced on his knee and read stories to. How did she get to be such a grown up person?  
  
"Fine, thank you. It was kind of you to invite me." At least the boy had manners.  
  
"So, Lieutenant, do you have plans for after the war?" he asked. Noin and Tamara weren't there at the moment, he might as well get a few questions in.  
  
"Actually, I do. There's a really great university in Sanc that I can go to and take engineering classes. Tamara and I have been looking into that."  
  
"So you're both going to be engineers?"  
  
"With a little luck and a lot of work, yes. but if you want or need her to be something different, I'm sure that's okay with her, too," he covered. Zechs determined that the boy's answer was acceptable. Perhaps he really wasn't such a bad kid after all. And if Tamara had to date someone, it might as well be someone that he knew and had checked their background.  
  
"So you to have plans for the future?"  
  
Calen hesitated, clearly embarrassed. "Not like that, sir, but we do have plans for our studies."  
  
"Are you interrogating him again?" came Tamara's frustrated voice. "Leave my friend alone, Dad. He's cool, he's okay, he's not some psycho assassin or anything. Please, just be normal for one day..." she begged. "Calen, why don't we go over here? You'll have fun with Duo." He nodded to her father and picked up his plate, moving with Tamara. He could hear laughter coming from the other side of the table and guessed that Duo was over there somewhere.  
  
After dinner, everyone gathered around the living room to open gifts. Everyone had pulled names from a bag to determine who to get gifts for. Tamara was eager to go first. Everyone agreed, smiling at the way she got excited about her gift. "I got you, Uncle Heero," she announced, turning to the former pilot. She brought out a flat package wrapped in festive paper. "And I also got something for you." She handed him an almost identical package. Calen had a good idea of what this was, as did Sally. Both seemed to get a sinking feeling in their stomachs as they watched Heero open his present. He tore off the paper, revealing a manila envelope. Everyone else in the room was quite puzzled as to what it was.  
  
Heero opened the envelope, thoroughly puzzled. He pulled out a stack of papers, the top of which was a report, written by Tamara. He began to read it out loud. "After careful research and a few tests, I have found the identity of your true family. Your name is Michael Vaughn, son of Andrew Vaughn, a famous pacifist." He stopped reading and looked over at Calen, how was holding his own copy of the papers. The entire room was quiet until Tamara spoke.  
  
"You have a family now, both of you. You always said, Uncle Heero, that you wanted an identity. I got an idea into my head for you and I searched the databases like Calen did for me once." Calen mentally slapped himself for being so stupid as to explain how he did that. Tamara continued her story. "I obtained the password for a database of DNA that is now controlled by the Earth Sphere Alliance. Only one person knows the password, a person that I got a hold of through a connection. Then, I ran some tests on your DNA and had it analyzed. Then I ran a check on matching patterns and up comes this entry for Michael Ryan Vaughn. After his father was assassinated by Odin Lowe, no one has seen him."  
  
"So Heero Yuy is my uncle?" Calen asked, wondering even more about what Octera had said. At first, he had believed the Federation commander to be a liar, but with this proof... He only wondered how the commander found out. What if he was telling the whole truth? He pushed that thought away quickly. Tamara would never betray him or her family.  
  
Heero stood in amazement. Odin had never said anything about where he had come from. Never had he once mentioned that his parents or his family. Did he even know, or did he just take pity on an orphan? He looked at the Vaughn boy. So this was his nephew, his brother's son. He wondered then what his brother must have been like. He might as well ask the boy.  
  
Calen was getting more and more worried, Octera's voice playing over and over in his head. "Does anyone else know about this?" he asked.  
  
"Of course not. I made sure that no one else would find out," she reassured him. She gave him one of her smiles, which, like the arisze were seldom and fleeting, but rather charming. He knew what she was trying to do. She wanted him to loosen up a little, relax around her family. He understood where she was coming from. The last few weeks had been unbelievably hectic, especially since there had been frequent meetings with Federation leaders like Trayan Tinten. Or should he say Trayan Octera. The thought of the black haired boy made him sick. To think that he was trying to get Tamara involved in treason was enough to make his blood boil.  
  
The rest of the present opening went well until Tamara's beeper started going off. So did Mariemaia's, and both young women rushed to pick theirs up. Snapping it on, she looked down at the display. It was from Major Rhodes, and was flashing the emergency light. Whatever it was, it wasn't good. Just then, the vidphone rang. One after the other began to ring until they could be heard at all ends of the house. Their owners ran to answer them, as Catherine turned on the television. "Oh no," she managed to stammer, dropping the controller to the ground. Calen turned around in dread, not knowing what he would see.  
  
On the television, a scene of destruction glared at them. The charred remains of the Congress building were still being attacked by the mobile suits, all of them being old Serpent Customs. And from the back, there was a lone Gundam standing there and blasting away at the last stronghold of democracy. No one could believe their eyes as the news reporter showed the ruins and destruction solemnly, saying that the Vice Foreign Minister and New OZ commanders were unavailable for comment. Still totally surprised, Calen only stood in horror and watched. How dare they do this on Christmas!  
  
"Calen! Suit up," he heard Tamara call. "It's time." She came down the stairs, dressed in her red uniform and black cape, ready for battle. Her silver mask was in her hands, and she had a look of determination in her eyes.  
  
"What do you mean by 'it's time?'" he asked. Following Tamara came Mariemaia Khushrenada and her boyfriend, Colonel Minoru, both in full military dress.  
  
"It's time for Operation Full Moon, Lieutenant. The final assault on the Federation has come," explained the colonel. Calen let out a long sigh of frustration and relief. So this was the final stand, the determining factor in the war against the Federation. It was a monumentous occasion, one where he should get worried, but he decided that he must stay calm.  
  
He jogged up to his room on the upper level, Tamara following close behind. She stood outside his door and briefed him on the situation while he changed into his full New OZ Lieutenant regalia. "I received a challenge from Trayan. He says that he is beginning the final battle. This is a duel to the death, Calen. Just me and him. Whoever wins gets the pleasure of killing the general and winning the war. I'll need your help, Calen. I'm counting on you and Swiftstrike to save the Sanc Kingdom."  
  
" I won't let you down," he said, opening the door. He stood there in front of her, dressed in full uniform, complete with the dark blue suit jacket with its neat silver buttons, the white pants and the long navy cape. His boots were polished and shined and his tie hung neatly about his neck. He was perfectly ready for battle, looking like the respectable officer he was.  
  
"Calen," Tamara began, trying to find the words to say what she had to say. "I don't know if I'll make it back. And if I don't..." Calen cut her off.  
  
"Don't talk like that. You could kick Trayan from here to L-5 any day. You're coming back, Tamara. We're invincible, remember? Even death doesn't stop us."  
  
"I know, but just in case. I just wanted to thank you for everything. For your friendship, your support, and for always being there for me. You've really changed my life, and I wanted to just say that before we go our separate ways."  
  
"Friends forever," he confirmed, looking over at the girl he had known since his school days. How lonely he had been back then. She had appeared to be a nice, decent girl. He would never forget how she thought their meeting was a cruel joke at first. Or the fact that their first words were about spaghetti. He stared at his best friend, refusing to believe the thought that he might lose her. "Don't die on me," he whispered, under his breath. She heard it and looked him straight in the eyes.  
  
"I don't plan on it," she whispered back, buttoning the top button of his dress coat. Meanwhile, they were being watched by two other people. Mariemaia and Minoru watched the two talk with each other.  
  
"If I didn't know they were best friends, I would say that they made a cute couple." Minoru remarked to the other woman. She laughed at this.  
  
"Minoru, that's the last thing they're thinking of. We had better get going. There's no use defending Sanc if it won't be there by the time we reach it." With his arm wrapped around her shoulder, they left together, heading for the shuttle. Operation Full Moon was poised and ready to make its entrance.  
  
  
  
Well, the final battle has begun. Don't worry, it's not the end. In fact, it's only a new beginning for our favorite characters. Will Tamara win in her battle against Trayan? Or will Trayan defeat her and succeed in his mission. Or perhaps Garrett Octera told the truth and they are planning to rule the world jointly. Tune in next time to see what is going to happen. Thanks for all those of you who read and review. It really makes me happy to see the flag go up and to read your nice reviews. I will even take criticism, people. Just tell me your honest opinion and you will make a girl happy. Write to me at Chryseisd@aol.com! 


	24. Chapter Twenty-Four

Chapter Twenty-Four  
  
On the battlefield, Trayan Octera waited for Arisze. It would be a battle to end all battles, he decided. After years of plotting and planning for this, it had come. He had gained the loyalty of the Earth Sphere Military Federation forces. They followed him, the child of the Earth as well as of the colonies. He had all he needed to take over the army and gain power on Earth. Once Earth fell to him, he would move on to space. Soon, he would be the unrivaled leader, just as his mother had taught him. Hazouri Tinten was said to have Barton blood in her, which was probably what gave her amazing ambition. She had trained her son well in many things. Especially to hate his father. The 17 year old smiled to think of the revenge he would take for his mother. He only wished she could live to see the day when the older Octera would be disposed.  
  
The girl would show up soon, no doubt. She was brave and valorous, not one to turn down a challenge. He knew her far too well, and that would be her undoing. She might have a chance at winning if she didn't lose control of her emotions. That was the problem with fighting. One could turn the advantage towards themselves by getting the other's emotions to start causing tensions. Before long, they would fly into a rage and be rather easy to defeat. Trayan preferred such tactics to straight fighting. Manipulation was his specialty.  
  
He looked at the battlefield where his mobile suit army still stood, attacking the Sanc Kingdom. Before nightfall, the kingdom would be his. He couldn't wait to see the look on Queen Relena's face when he removed her from her position. The uppity woman had ruled the Earth far too long with her absurd notions of pacifism. He would show Earth what a true ruler was.  
  
Sure enough, he saw groups of mobile suits on the horizon. One of them he recognized as Gundam Nova, the gundam that she was now piloting. It was indeed a work of art, he decided. It was such a pity that it had to be destroyed. The girl really was wonderful to work with. He could have used someone like her to help him, but she would never agree to his cause or forgive him for betraying her once. In a way, she was much like his mother: once a sin has been committed, it can never be redeemed. In fact, she reminded him so much of his mother. Perhaps that was why he sought her out like this.  
  
"So, Trayan. Are you ready for the end?"  
  
"Always," he answered. "The Tintens are never afraid of battle." They faced each other for a split second before Trayan spoke again. "I thought we'd take this up to the new colony under construction. We don't want to hurt any innocent civilians."  
  
"Agreed," Tamara replied curtly. That was the whole reason she was going to do this. She had to protect her parents, her aunt, and all the people. It was her responsibility. She thought of Mariemaia and Minoru back at headquarters on Battleship Gemini. They were already engaging Federation forces in battle, hoping to end the two year long conflict between them. Perhaps peace would have a chance, planted in the ground that war had ravaged and victory had renewed.  
  
Meanwhile, Calen was yelling orders from Swiftstrike to his Leo troops. They were advancing on the Federation line, almost ready to engage in battle. He looked at the sky only to see Tamara speeding off to space. He looked up at where she had been for a while, hoping that she would take care of herself. Then, he returned his mind to the battle. Orders and information was pouring in via the radio and the last command rested solely upon his judgment. Taking a careful look at the attacking Tauruses, he made his decision. "All right, guys. When I give the signal, we're going to burst out there and fir with all we have. Let's protect our home. Ready..." they all got into position. "GO!" he shouted.  
  
"Darting up in Swiftstrike, he swept among the enemy cutting through them in an effort to protect his men. The mobile suits were no match for a gundam, and between his troops and Swiftstrike, it looked as if there might be a chance of beating them. Then, he saw the carriers. They came and began to unload mobile suits by the hundreds. Serpent Customs that had long been out of use were now being unloaded. The lieutenant gulped, hoping that he could hold out until backup came. Reaching for his radio, he looked once more towards the sky. "Hope you're better off up there," he mumbled.  
  
Poised above the abandoned and partially built colony, the two gundams began their final combat. Tamara had traded in her favorite gigantic beam canon for her buster rifles. She was firing rapidly at the other suit while dodging blasts from his own beam cannon. Her adrenaline was rushing and she could feel every aspect of the battle. Her mask and its input cords fed information directly to screens that popped up over the view windows in the mask. How Calen had managed to find something so intricate was beyond her.  
  
She remembered her father talking to her when she was a little girl. He had said that wearing a mask in battle allowed you to take off all the sins of the battlefield along with it. She remembered when Mom let her see a few pictures of him in his mask that he never let her see, his explanation being that he was a different person then. Since she was a little girl, Tamara knew that her father was ashamed for his participation in the wars of the past. He thought of her as her as his redemption, the one who would make up for all of his mistakes.  
  
But now she was fighting, a warrior like him. As she fought in the duel, she hoped that he would be proud of her. All of her life, she had wanted him to be proud of her and what she did. Through her academic achievements and through her endeavors with New OZ. This duel was her own redemption. She would atone for the mistake of following Trayan.  
  
Pretty soon they would be forced to discard their large weapons. She replaced her buster rifle and pulled out her sickle-scythe. It gleamed silver, a warning to the other combatant that she was prepared for hand to hand combat. In Triton. Trayan nodded. "So this is it, the beginning of the end. Or is it the end of the beginning,"  
  
"It's the beginning of peace, Trayan. I won't let you plunge this world into chaos. Peace will prevail, as will the gundams. My uncles fight for the just cause, a cause that they know and can feel inside them. What cause do you fight for?"  
  
"I fight for the woman who raised me, who taught me about ambition and life. She was a Tinten and a Barton, and she has passed down the lineage to me, her son. I fight because she was abandoned by her family and the man who said he loved her. Such people do not deserve Earth."  
  
"But what about the other people, Trayan. What about Emrys, the boy from Whales who died while mobile suits attacked his town" Or Ami, the girl who was crushed beneath the rubble of her school? And what about each of the eighty four students and 10 instructors that perished in the Lake Victoria Civilian Academy Massacre? What did they do to deserve what happened. Do they not deserve Earth, and the chance to live?"  
  
"Humanity is not ready for peace, Tamara. If they weren't, they would never have accepted Octera as the Federation leader."  
  
"What needs to be gone are the flames that smolder and start these fires. Peace will come, whether it is through my hands or at the hands of the gundam pilots," Tamara spat at her opponent. She brought her scythe down to clash with his trident. "And peace shall come, Trayan. I have a home to go back to and a land to protect. Years ago, I was at a weak spot in my life. I had just lost my only friend and all my dreams for the future. I was desperate and you took advantage of me. After all the work I did with you, you betrayed me and my trust. And I will never forgive you for that."  
  
"For what? For not telling you that I was an Octera. You never said a word as to what we were doing out there. Half of the time, you planned it. And let me ask you this. Why won't you forgive me when you forgave your precious Calen for abandoning you for so many years."  
  
"He didn't abandon me. And don't bring him into this." She was getting emotional now. He had hit just the right spot. The Vaughn kid was perfect. It was her own fault since she had gotten so attached to him. Her mother might also be a weak spot. Trayan decided to use his manipulation technique to their full extent.  
  
"You're so sure of this boy, aren't you. Did it ever occur to you that he thinks you're a traitor?" He smiled to himself, pulling out a tape recorder. He had specially prepared this tape. Pushing the play button, he held it to the microphone.  
  
"We have a serious investigation to run."  
  
"An investigation of Tamara?"  
  
"We have to investigate at least."  
  
"She's like that, Sally. It's her style to do a secretive takeover from the inside." He ended the tape. In Nova Gundam, Tamara sat transfixed. That was Sally and Calen. She couldn't believe her ears. It had to be a trick. She trusted Calen, and he trusted her. As much as she wanted to believe that he hadn't said something like that, there was proof. She would recognize his voice anywhere. She felt her consciousness melt away and let her body go on automatic mode.  
  
Inside her mind, she was going crazy. No wonder he was suspicious of everything I do, she fumed. He thinks I am betraying peace. But I haven't done a thing. Her blood began to boil as she angrily fought off her enemy. Another little voice was struggling to be heard. What if Trayan is lying, it said.  
  
"He can't be lying," she said, not realizing that it was out loud.  
  
"Calen would never betray you. He's your best friend, your other half. How can you believe that he would say something like that. Who did everything in their power to come and see you when he found out that you were alive? Who joined the army for you even though he hated war? Not Trayan, certainly. Is that how you want to live your life, Tamara? Letting Trayan hold this power over you. Let go of your anger, your sorrow. Remember Victoria and fight for the cause that is in your heart, not for vengeance."  
  
Yelling out loud, she flew forward with Nova and brought her scythe down on Triton gundam. For a split second, time seemed to stop. Then, she saw the silvery glow begin to spread across the gundam. Trayan gave a grim smile over the vidphone as it snapped on in her cockpit. "You have won our duel. Now, you are truly the Deathflower. It has been a pleasure, Arisze." He let his suit all towards the colony, tumbling down as the suit began to fall apart. Letting out his breath, he sighed. "I have not accomplished what you wished for, Mother. But I have sewn the seed that you planted. She will fulfill your last wish. Forgive me for my sins." With that, the vidphone clicked off in a mess of static.  
  
The girl in gundam Nova watched the other gundam plummet to the colony. Jetting away to the safety of the atmosphere, she looked on as the colony exploded upon Triton's impact. It lit up the sky, casting bright light and debris into the air. Finally, it was all over. "Thank you for your strength, Calen," she whispered. And then, to Trayan, "I forgive you." A transmission came through for her then, from Lieutenant Vaughn.  
  
"Tamara!!!!!" Calen called over the vidphone. He had seen the flash in the sky, and prayed that it wasn't her.  
  
"It's over, Calen." She thought back to Trayan's words. "It's the end of the beginning."  
  
  
  
Well, there you go. Don't worry, there are more battles left to fight. Please keep reading. I intend on writing more in this story, so stick with me. Next chapter, our heroes must deal with the older Octera. Will they bring peace to Earth and the colonies? As always, send comments, criticisms, flames, whatever to chryseisd@aol.com or just review. Thanks!  
  



	25. Chapter Twenty-Five

Chapter Twenty-Five  
  
On the ground, the gundams were holding off the troops. Wufei was fighting furiously as the Serpent Customs kept coming. All he wanted to do was survive this battle. There was a break in the fire and her rested his gundam for a few seconds. Why did they always have to attack at the worst times. He took out the tiny velvet box in his pocket and stared at it. He should have said something before, but he had been foolish. Now, he wondered if he would ever get the chance to give it to Sally.  
  
More Serpent Customs dropped down, and he resumed the battle. They just kept coming, all of them on orders from Garrett Octera to fight until the Sanc Kingdom fell. Over the radio came the voice of Lieutenant Vaughn. "Major Rhodes, I need you to take care of command for me. There's something I have to go do." Wufei looked towards the boy's gundam. It was still fighting off the enemy suits, but was slower than usual. His mind must be elsewhere, probably with Tamara. Then, the young boy began to talk to the gundam pilots on a more secure line. "From what I've heard, the younger Octera has been defeated. I'm going after the commander," he told them.  
  
"Go ahead," came Heero's voice from Neo-Wing. "We'll clean up here." The Chinese pilot grinned in his cockpit. It was time to leave the war in the hands of the new generation.....  
  
Calen flew off in Swiftstrike. "Tamara? Are you still there?" he called over the intercom. His vid-screen snapped on, showing the girl in her gundam still wearing her mask.  
  
"Let's go after him, Trayan. Let's go get Octera."  
  
"Leave him to me," Calen growled. "I must take revenge for my mother's death, as well as for Victoria. I know you understand."  
  
"I do, but listen to me on this Calen. If you fight for revenge and anger and hate, you will lose. Find your strength in something else. Fight for peace, not for revenge. That's the only thing that will help you. Allow your emotions to get in the way, and Octera will end up hurting you." Then, she said more softly. "Trayan was so consumed by revenge that he forgot where he was going and what he was doing. I won't let that happen to you."  
  
"I won't Tamara," he promised. However, the determined look in his eyes did not fade. Today, he would end the war. There had been far too much fighting. Too many innocent civilians had died in this battle. He would always remember how his mother had died, leaving him behind. She used to be a soldier, and knew the risks of war. He remembered the way she always told him about his father and how brave he had been. As a boy, he had worshipped Kevin Vaughn, and dreamed of being just like him. But Ana had different plans for her son. She also told him of his grandfather, the pacifist. He grew up with an understanding that peace, not pacifism, was sacred, and must be preserved.  
  
It was Tamara who had taught him about friendship, fighting, and the true nature of war. She always said that when in a battle, you must abandon your prejudices and fight for the people and the ideal, but never forget who you are, or you will lose yourself. That was precisely what he intended to do as he kpet going towards the battleship where Commander Octera was. Soon, the war would be over, and he could merely be Calen Vaughn, no longer a gundam soldier.  
  
On the battleship, Garrett Octera was pacing in his quarters. News had just come of Trayan's defeat near the incomplete colony. Strangely enough, the man felt almost sad for his son. Even thought the boy was a menace and a schemer, there was something about him that made Octera feel guilty. Perhaps it was the way that he was so much like Hazouri that haunted him. With the boy gone, her last legacy had disappeared and he felt alone. She had truly left him alone.  
  
Sitting down on the bed, he looked at his one picture of her. Her golden-red hair drifted down her shoulders and her ice blue eyes stared straight at the camera lens. She had been beautiful then, and graceful and articulate as well. He had fallen so much in love with her, but the pressures of work and his goal had beckoned to him. She had wanted power, and he would gladly give it to her. However, absence had not made her heart grow fonder. Instead, it had hardened it.  
  
"I have nothing left, Hazouri. Don't haunt me any longer," he pleaded. His reason for gaining the power was gone. What would it accomplish anyway? His war no longer had a purpose. He was fighting for an empty cause. At first, he had convinced himself that he must prove himself worthy, and show her ghost that she had been wrong. He would gain the world in her honor. But there was no honor now, only an endless sea of war. It was not worth it to go on.  
  
He was tempted at the thought of seeing her once again. Would she still hate him if he brought an end to this? Perhaps he could stop what he had started. But there was only one way to do that. Letting a grim smile spread across his face, he stood up. "I will end this war and join you, Hazouri. Life is empty now, I do not need it any longer. But those on Earth do. So I shall do what must be done." With that, he left for the bridge to take care of arangements.  
  
He announced to each Federation base that should anything happen to him they were to surrender immediately. Each operator was puzzled, but confirmed the order. He then sat back and waited. The gundams would come soon enough. There was no need ot go and find them. They would seek him out.  
  
Sure enough, he spotted the black, forest green, and silver gundam streaking towards them. "So this will end it all, will it? I am ready Hazouri." The officers on the bridge began to panic and they scurried to the gun turrets, however, Octera kne wthat they would not be in time. The older man stood to face his enemy. "Please, young man. It is up to you now to bring peace."  
  
Calen pulled out the huge mega canon that Tamara had lent him. He was amazed at how little resistance he encountered. He charged it up, watching the blue light grow. Then, he pulled on the lever and watched as it streaked towards the ship. On impact, the ship remained in tact for a few moments. Inside, Octera bowed his head. "Hazouri," he sighed, letting his last breath slip out. Then, the ship exploded, and Garrett felt himself slip away from his body. Suddenly, he thought he saw a glimpse of a woman with long red-gold hair. Smiling, he let go......  
  
*  
  
When the gundams landed at the Sanc Kingdom, they were greeted as heros. Octera's forces had surrendered after fighting the gundams became a hopeless struggle. Mariemaia and her forces had dealt them heavy damage, and they had no other choice. Besides, they were leaderless and fighting without a cause. Many began to long for peace, sick of living the life of a soldier in a losing army. Even the colonies rioted for peace in the universe. And thus, a cease fire and treaty was reached.  
  
Zechs dropped out of the Tallgeese III, glad that this fight was over. His daughter had begun to douse the fire, and Lieutenant Vaughn had extinguished it fully. Now, peace would reign once more. Perhaps the next generation could be raised in peace. He looked over at his fellow pilots. Heero was looking almost haggard. He had been doing a great deal of the fighitng in heavily hit areas. Together, they had refused to let the suits through to the Sanc Kingdom. It was different, fighting side by side instead of against each other.  
  
Quatre jumped out, worried about Trowa, who had crashed his gundam a few minutes before cease fire had been announced. He was so worried that he would not be in time to help. The clown was still consciousness, but was barely hanging on. He planned to go dierectly to the hospital where Trowa was being taken. The paramedics had told him that there was every chance that he would survive with no permanent injury.  
  
Wufei was just glad to get back to the ground and home. Sally walked out of the shuttle that had come from Battleship Gemini along with Mariemaia and Colonel Minoru Akamatsu. He rushed up to her, which took her by surprise. "Sally," he said, taking boht of her hands. She was so puzzled that it showed in her smoky blue eyes. H continued with what he had to sayl, letting nothing stop him. "I've wanted to do this for so long, but something has always gotten in the way. Sally Po, will you do me th honor of being my wife. He pulled out the ring box and got down on one knee as he was told was the custom. The tall blonde woman was speechless for a while. Wufei began to get worried. "I'm sorry for calling you 'Onna' so much, Sally. And if you want, we can adopt children, girls, three of them if you want."  
  
"Chang Wufei, that is so amazing," Sally said, awide grin spreading across her face. Many bystanders whispered about how sweet it was, and the press closed in to take pictures. Once people began to crowd around, the two Preventers decided to go somewhere quieter.  
  
"Maybe I should follow suit," Minoru joked, slipping an arm around Mariemaia.  
  
"Sounds good to me," she said. It was as simple as that. Love seemed to be in the air upon the homecoming. One person stood, waiting for his love to return. Zechs waited in anticipation. Noin should have come back from Gemini by now. But there was no sight of her. He paced back and forth on the hill. Then, he saw two suits land side by side. Nova and Swiftstrike settled down and their pilots jumped out nad slid down the rope.  
  
Calen ran over to Tamara and picked her up by the waist swinging her around. "We did it," he exclaimed. She grinned, leaning her head down when her father walked over to them.  
  
"Come, on Calen, put me down," she mumbled. He set her back on the ground and she took off her mask. "Is there something wrong, Dad?"  
  
"Where is your mother? Is she all right?" he asked worriedly, hoping that he would know.  
  
"She's fine. They picked her as one of the Sanc Kingdom Alliance delgates to the cease fire signing. She's going to be home in just a little while," she explained. Excusing herself, she left her dad to wait in the wake of the gundams and made her way through the crowds of people with Calen, suddenly aware at how tightly she was holding onto his hand. She promptly let is go. "We're best friends forever, right?" she asked softly, so that the other people couldn't hear.  
  
"Of course," he replied, backing away from her. Both of them were suddenly aware of the distance between them. Soon, however, they had forgotten about the weird feeling and simply thought about how peaceful life was going to be. At last, thir years of fighting were over. They could live their lives peacefully and independently. "So, are you ready for the rest of your life?" he asked her.  
  
"I'm ready for anything that peace brings."  
  
  
  
  
Well, there it is. Short, but sweet. Don't worry, this is definitely not the end. As Koneko-sama knows, I have been so excited to get to this next part! Tune in again for the next chapter and send any comments to chrysiesd@aol.com or write me a review. Thanks for reading my fic!  



	26. Chapter Twenty-Six

Chapter Twenty-Six  
  
1 year after the defeat of the Federation:  
  
The vid-phone began to ring, and the young woman answered. "Preventer Storm here." On the screen a smiling redhead laughed at her friend.  
  
"Still at the office? Tamara, you are such a party animal," she said sarcastically.  
  
"You know me, Mrs. Akamatsu," Tamara teased right back.  
  
"Hey, you can't call me that for another few months. It's Lady Khushrenada to you."  
  
"Anyway, why are you calling? Don't tell me that there's trouble."  
  
"No reason, it's just that everyone wished you were here."  
  
"Someone has to work, Mariemaia. Look what happened the last Christmas that we tried to take a day off."  
  
"You really need to have more fun, Tamara. Everyone's made it for once. And don't you want to meet Meiran and Lien? They're such cuties." She laughed, picking up one of the babies crawling on the floor. "See, this little girl misses you." Tamara giggled at the antics of the Chang children. Wufei and Sally sure had their hands full when they decided to adopt the twin girls. "Plus," Mariemaia added, "Your mom is doing the cooking."  
  
"Don't you dare," began Tamara as visions of her mother's Italian food began to drift through her mind.  
  
"Chicken tortellini in mushroom cream sauce, gnocchi, panetone, and of course, tiramisu."  
  
"That's blackmail!"  
  
"So you're on your way?"  
  
"Sure, but only for the panetone and the tortellini. I'll still be on call.  
  
"Calen's here, too," Mariemaia reminded her friend. She saw the brief flash in the seventeen year old's eyes that soon died away, replaced by a responsible and dignified look.  
  
"I know. I'll be there as soon as I get this stuff in order." She shut off the vid-phone and grabbed her coat. Taking one look at her pager, she tossed it over her shoulder and onto her desk. Letting the secretary know that she would be out, she exited the building. She could always take care of things tomorrow.  
  
*  
  
Mariemaia faced a very upset Preventer in her office at the embassy. "I have to do what?" demanded Tamara.  
  
"Settle down! No wonder they call you Storm."  
  
"Listen, Tamara, it's just one party. You've weaseled out of every single victory party, anniversary celebration, and you never represent New OZ at social functions. I think you can go." She put her hands on her hips, giving her a serious look. She had the best plan for that night, and it would work without a hitch if she planned it correctly. After months of watching Tamara and Calen study together and do little things with each other but always keep their distance, she decided that enough was enough. It was time that they got together.  
  
The eighteen year old Preventer agent was not happy. She hated parties and things like that. After all the years as a military and diplomatic leader, she still hated being forced into social situations. "Listen, I already have plans for tonight."  
  
"Well, you're just going to have to cancel them. This is important, Tamara. Everyone from here to Mars colony will be expecting you to be at that party. You're just going to have to go, whether you like it or not." That settled it. She couldn't talk her way out again, she would just have go to this one and appease her friend.  
  
"Fine, I'll go. Why do I always give in to you?!" Tamara fumed.  
  
"Because I'm always right?" teased the 26 year old redhead. She grinned, knowing that she had won the argument. "Besides, you'll have fun. I promise." She returned to her desk and sat down in the big chair. Her younger friend followed and sat down in the chair in front of her desk.  
  
"Well, I'd better go get my dress uniform dry cleaned so it's in decent shape for tonight.   
  
"Tamara, I hate to say this, but," continued the redhead, "you will need a dress for tonight."  
  
Tamara thought a bit before replying. "No problem. I'll just borrow one from my mom. She has some nice stuff that I could borrow." Mariemaia began to laugh, not being able to help herself.  
  
"Tamara, this isn't a formal party. This is at a club. Your mom's stuff isn't going to work."  
  
"Does that mean we have to go shopping?" she asked dejectedly. Mariemaia pulled out Minoru's credit card.  
  
"We have purchase power," she grinned. "And besides, you like shopping, remember."  
  
"Not for dresses I don't," she answered sullenly as the commander hustled her out.  
  
"Just go down and hop in my car and I will see you in a little bit, OK?" she said, almost shoving her out into the hallway. Tamara sighed in frustration and made her way to the parking lot as if she were going to an execution. Mariemaia grinned as she watched her go down the hall. Sneaking back into her office, she called Minoru? "How is the operation going?" she asked.  
  
"Perfectly," came her fiancee's voice from the other line. She smiled.  
  
"See you before long," she said, letting him go back to his work. Everything was going according to plan......  
  
Once at the mall, Mariemaia dragged Tamara into a store that had good party clothes. They walked among isles of tuxedos, ties, gowns, and shoes. "So, anything catch your eye?" she asked the platinum blonde girl.  
  
"This one," Tamara said, grabbing the first dress she saw. She was truly desperate to escape this shop of tortures.  
  
"That dress would be perfect if you were going to a funeral," the older woman remarked, looking at the full length black dress that was flat and hung like a potato sack. "This one would be much better." She pulled a red dress off the rack, one that would come to knee level. It was cute, or so she thought. Holding it up, she tried to picture Tamara in it, it she couldn't. The 18 year old gave her a disgusted look.  
  
"Definitely not that one," she begged. Mariemaia hung the dress back up and resumed her search. "What about this?" She held up a floor length dark green gown with off the shoulder sleeves.  
  
"That might just work," the young diplomat mused, looking it up and down. She also picked up another dress, this one was pale purple and made of a silky fabric. She might as well look for something for herself as well. Then, she saw it. The perfect dress for Tamara. It was a robin's egg blue dress with beads that dangled along the bottom. It would set off her hair and eyes perfectly. "This one," she declared, holding it up. Tamara looked it over, nodding. She just wanted to make her escape.  
  
Mariemaia gave her the dress along with shoes that matched it. The 18 year old didn't understand what the huge deal was with having everything match and go together. It was just one party. She went into the dressing room and changed out of her Preventers uniform. It was so comfortable, and she hated formal clothing. Pulling the dress on, however, revealed it to be very comfortable indeed. The material was stretchy and she was glad that she hadn't gained much weight recently. Between her workouts and her nasty habit of working instead of eating, she had lost much of the weight that she had gained before she joined Preventer. The beads jangled as she fought to get the high heeled shoes on, banging around the small dressing room. At last, she got them on and put the matching earrings in. She then made her way outside to see if Mariemaia approved.  
  
Outside, she paused at the mirror and looked at herself. The dress really wasn't that bad. Then, she saw someone else in the mirror. "Calen?" she asked, turning around. He was standing there, dressed in a black shirt and black dress pants, looking very nice indeed. She almost let her jaw drop to the ground.  
  
"Tamara!" they both just stared at each other for a while, before Calen backed away a little. "Listen, there's something I have to tell you."  
  
"Yes?"  
  
"I kind of have to go to a party tonight and...." He noticeably stalled, too embarrassed to ask the next question.  
  
"Yes?" she asked, a little more expectantly.  
  
"I need a date." There he had said it. "And since we're best friends, I figured we could go together and I'll pretend to be your date."  
  
"Sound's great," Tamara stammered. She couldn't believe this. How did they ever end up in this situation?  
  
"Your shoes look nice," he tried, trying to break the silence.  
  
"Your shoes look nice too." Tamara couldn't believe how lame that had sounded. The staring and silence continued for a while until Calen excused himself. It so happened that he was here with Minoru to pick something up for the party. He left, taking a look back at Tamara. He had never seen her in a dress before. Minoru led him over to the counter.  
  
"So, we need to find you a date now. That shouldn't be a problem. half the girls in New OZ would love to.." Calen didn't let him finish.  
  
"I already have one." Minoru smiled and glanced over his shoulder. His fiancee was behind him, holding the purple dress and the blue one along with the matching shoes, earrings and handbags. "Mission accomplished," he whispered. The redhead and the former colonel exchanged smiles. This was going to be too easy.  
  
  



	27. Chapter Twenty-Seven

Chapter Twenty-Seven  
  
Calen was nervous as he drove up to the Peacecraft manor in the Sanc Kingdom. He shut off the car and prayed that this would go well. They could have walked, but somehow, he felt as if he should drive her there. She should be alone, since Minoru and Mariemaia were walking there. His best friend was waiting in there for him, about to go into a really awkward situation. She was truly his best friend, nothing more. The 19 year old felt sort of guilty for dragging her into this, but she was probably obligated to go as well. Stepping out of the car, he walked up to the front door.  
  
He opened it just as she did, and she fell backwards in her heels. Calen stepped in to give her a hand up. Pulling her to her feet, he was amazed at what he saw. She had her long platinum blonde hair swept up in the elegant style that was fashionable with many women. Tamara was even wearing makeup, which, like everything she set her mind to, looked great. Her shoes even matched her dress, and so did the handbag. He almost started laughing. Tamara barely was able to put on matching socks in the morning sometimes. The silence was awkward, and he had to say something. "Nice shoes," he commented. Afterwards, he felt extremely stupid. He had said that at the store!  
  
"You too," she replied, with an equal amount of awkwardness. Tamara just stood and stared at Calen in his black pants and black shirt that seemed to fit perfectly. She had forgotten how much he had changed since they first became friends. He had grown so tall and strong. There was only a trace of the boy she had once known that showed on the soft features of his face. His intense green eyes were still the same, though. Then, she seemed to find her voice. "Well, are we going?"  
  
"Of course," he stammered. Walking with her out to the car, he wondered where his mind had gone. So she was wearing a dress? It was nothing to be amazed with. He resolved to maintain self control throughout the evening. Sticking the keys in the ignition he looked over rat the girl he was taking as his 'date'. Why was he so nervous about this anyway?  
  
At the club, the New Oz celebration was going strong. It was like a reunion, with all of the old officers meeting again. Mariemaia was right, most had dates or at least people to go with. It felt so strange to Tamara when Calen wrapped his arm around hers and escorted her to their table. He really was quite a gentleman, she noticed. They sat down with Mariemaia and Minoru at a table in the front. The boys wandered off to play pool while the women stayed at the table. "So," Mariemaia began, "Are you two having fun?"  
  
Tamara never got the chance to answer. A man with black hair walked up behind her. "Hey, do you wanna dance with me?" he asked, trying to make his voice sound suave and cool. Tamara spun around in her chair.  
  
"I'm sorry, Kanjiro. I'm here with someone," she replied, silently being thankful that she did indeed have a date incase she needed to prove it. The officer backed away once he saw her face and heard her voice.  
  
"Oh my gosh! Your Excellency! I'm so sorry, it's just that I didn't recognize you," he apologized. Then, "Who are you here with?"  
  
"Lieutenant Vaughn," she replied quickly.  
  
"Ah," he responded. The young major looked over at the Lieutenant who was getting ready to take a shot at his striped ball. "You two make a great couple," he backed out of the way, obviously embarrassed. Tamara blushed as well.  
  
"You know, Tamara, it's all right to dance with people. That's why we're here," Mariemaia explained. "You're pretty lucky. It's been what? Five minutes since you've been here and you're already getting offers to dance?" A few minute later, the younger commander got two more offers to dance, all of which were amazed at the commander's new appearance.  
  
"Mariemaia..." she mumbled. She touched the back of her head where Mariemaia had done her hair up. "Are you sure that this is such a great idea?" she asked nervously.  
  
"Listen, you need to live a little. Dance, have something to drink, have fun. And remember, if you don't grab Calen and dance with him, someone else will. He's considered one of the most eligible bachelors in New OZ."  
  
"WHAT?!!!!" demanded Tamara a little too loudly at the same time that Calen said the same thing, totally missing his shot at pool. Many people stopped and stared at them, but quickly returned to their business. Calen looked sheepish and quickly returned to his pool game, which was almost over. "What do you mean by that?"  
  
"Calen," Minoru explained. "In case you haven't noticed, Tamara is one of the most attractive girls in New OZ. She's already had three offers to dance. If you don't go over there and dance with her, someone else will."  
  
"We're just friends, Minoru. Nothing more," he said, lining up his shot again. He aimed carefully and let his shot go just as Tamara walked up to him. The ball he was aiming for rolled into the pocket, followed by the 8 ball. "I win," he announced simply turning to Tamara after he finished his game. "So, Tamara, I guess we should dance," he mumbled to her. She nodded and took his hands as they went out to the dance floor.  
  
Both of them suddenly became acutely aware of the proximity of the other person. Tamara looked at Calen. How could she be thinking things like this about her best friend? What was this funny feeling that she had inside? All they were doing was dancing, it didn't mean anything. one officer, Major Sumiko Okamuro made a comment on the two. "Getting a little close to Her Excellency, eh Lieutenant?" she teased.  
  
After the dance, they broke away, walking back to the table. Mariemaia and her fiancee were sitting back, sipping drinks. "We ordered you guys something, too," the redhead said, pushing a glass of some drink towards the two of them. Tamara gave it a disgusted look. Mariemaia gave her a disproving look back. "Listen, Tamara. You're not underage and one drink is not going to kill you. Go ahead. It tastes good, I promise." The 18 year old took a sip and nodded. It wasn't half bad. It tasted mostly like fruit, not at all like alcohol. Calen sipped his as well, as they talked about their plans for the weekend. The other couple talked about wedding arrangements, which needed to be taken care of soon.  
  
After a few hours, Mariemaia and Minoru had to leave. They had to go make some more plans, and they asked to borrow the car. The two remaining people agreed, and with that, the older officers left. "Just wait," Mariemaia whispered as they left together. "By tomorrow, they'll be dating." The party kept going, however. Tamara ordered some more drinks for them both as they chatted amiably about the upcoming wedding. She thought that it was so sweet the way the two had met through the army and had ended up fighting together and falling in love. Calen agreed. After a few more drinks, they were no longer chatting about the wedding.  
  
"I ttthink we should go," slurred Tamara as she tried to stand.  
  
"Me tooo," replied Calen, who was less drunk than his friend, but not by much. He helped her along as she walked, both of them completely intoxicated. It wasn't long before they reached the manor. They both walked inside and stopped.  
  
"You'll have to stay here tonight," Tamara said slowly. "I'll show you to the guest roooooms." They went upstairs to the bedroom hallway. No one was awake, and the servants were all gone. Calen caught Tamara's wrist lightly as she began to turn away after leaving him at the guest bedroom.  
  
"Let's quit fooling ourselves. This is love," he said softly. Tamara, although she was drunk, seemed to let that hit her brain hard.   
  
"I know," she answered. There was an awkward moment and then, Tamara put her hands up on Calen's shoulders. Pulling him down, she kissed him. So this was love, she mused as he kissed her back.  
  
  
  
  
Well, Calen and Tamara are finally together. But what will happen next? Will they still love each other when the alcohol wears off? Will something happen to change their love? Until next time, faithful readers! As always, please send me your comments at chrysiesd@aol.com if you have any.  



	28. Chapter Twenty-Eight

Chapter Twenty-Eight  
  
Tamara woke up the next morning with a terrible headache. She didn't dare to open her eyes, but just lay in bed. A warm spring breeze was blowing in the windows, which she thought was one of the best feelings in the world. Somehow, she felt so safe here, so protected. Was it the breeze? She let out a tiny sigh and snuggled against..... Wait a minute..... Rolling over and opening her eyes, Tamara screamed.  
  
At the table under the window, the two teens sat facing each other. Neither of them said a thing for a long time, only looking at each other with an insane mix of emotions. Finally, they both spoke at once.  
  
"Did we?"  
  
"Did you?"  
  
"I think.."  
  
"No way!"  
  
"But we..."  
  
"And you..."  
  
"Is it?  
  
"Why did we..."  
  
"No!" Tamara laid her head down on the table. "How did this happen?! Do you have any idea of what my dad is going to do to me?"  
  
"Do to you? What is he going to do to me?" Calen yelled back.  
  
"This is just great. Why did we have to go to that stupid party?"  
  
"Don't asked me. You were the one who asked me," she replied, drawing her head up and rubbing her temples.  
  
"I thought that you were going to ask me?" he shot back.  
  
"But you still asked first. Did you know that I was going to ask?"  
  
"I don't know, I didn't ask," he snapped. "Now lets quit fighting. It's the last thing we need to do right now."  
  
"You're one to talk, Mr. I-Don't-Get-Hangovers. I feel like I have to throw up right now, I have a massive headache and I just lost my virginity and all hopes for a political career if anything ever happens. Do you have any idea what could come of this? What if I get pregnant or get an STD? Did you ever think of that?"  
  
"Tamara, calm down. You're going to wake someone up and then we really will be toast."  
  
"Calen, we screwed up. This can't just be fixed with a few nice words. We need to figure out what to do."  
  
"Well, do you want to tell your family. I'd say that's your first priority."  
  
"Tell them! If I did we'd both be dead within 24 hours. Unless something happens, no one's going to find out about this."  
  
"You do know that if anything happens, I will take care of you," he reassured.  
  
"Yeah, but how?" She broke down, shivering as she sat in her chair, feeling the breeze turn cold. "What are we going to do..." She almost felt ready to start crying when she really did feel like she had to throw up. Rushing to the guest room's bathroom, she began to regurgitate all that she had drank and eaten the last night. She was suddenly aware that Calen was holding her hair back as she clutched her stomach. "thanks," she mumbled.  
  
"That's what a friend is. Someone who will help you when you're drunk and puking." She wondered how he managed to be so kind to her even after what they had been through. Yet no matter how hard she tried, she couldn't think of him as her best friend any more. I just wasn't like that now. It was different, but she couldn't describe it. All she knew was that it was awkward and wonderful at the same time. But feelings were not as important right now as actions. Which happened to be puking at the moment....  
  
2 MONTHS LATER  
  
"I'm pregnant." Calen sat down hard, only he missed his chair by about eight inches and fell onto the floor. Tamara had her back turned, and was facing the window in her office at the old New OZ headquarters where she worked as a special agent for Preventer.  
  
"So we're going to have a baby?" he asked nervously. He felt so guilty at the whole situation. They had talked only occasionally since the incident has happened. Both of them had agreed that spending some time apart would be good. She had called him to her office today, and he hoped that they were ready to talk again. What he found, however, was quite different.  
  
"I'm going to have twins," she corrected.  
  
"What?" he exclaimed, climbing to his feet.  
  
"I'm going to have twins in January," she restated.  
  
"Does anyone know?" he became extremely worried for her. She was only 18, and already having kids. Not to mention the fact that he was responsible.  
  
"Mariemaia knows because she was with me when I got the tests done," Tamara replied, turning around. Her face was sad, and it looked as if she had aged amazingly over the past few days.  
  
"What are you going to tell your family?"  
  
"What else can I tell them?" she asked bewilderedly. "I'm going to tell them the truth. I just hope that they'll support me through this."  
  
"I told you that I'd support you if anything happened, Tamara, and I wasn't lying. If you want to get married..." She didn't let him finished.  
  
"No. Don't even ask, Calen. I don't want you guilted into marrying me."  
  
"But Tamara, these kids are going to need a father," he argued.  
  
"I'll do just fine on my own. I don't need help from you. You may have gotten me into this mess, and I need to get myself out." She walked over to him and looked him straight in the eyes. "Calen, I'd like to thank you for all that you've done for me, and all those years that we were best friends, but things are different now. You know exactly what I mean when I say that the feelings are just different now with these two on the way. I have to say goodbye now."  
  
"No," he mumbled, catching her hands in his. "I want to stay with you, help you through this. We're in this together, Tamara. I'm not going to leave you."  
  
"Calen, I'm leaving you before we both get hurt. I'm leaving because I care. You should go on with your life, with your studies at the Universities. You have what it takes to do whatever you want. Good bye." With that, she walked out, leaving him standing in her office, shattered. He should have known that night would change everything. But he didn't want to say goodbye.  
  
"Great, Vaughn. Just when you get everything all figured out, she leaves you." He looked out the window for a long time. Pushing it open, he felt the warm June breeze rush in. Strangely, we shivered, remembering that night. And he wondered if they were really that drunk when they made their decision.  
  
Half an hour later, Tamara had called a family meeting. Noin, Zechs, and Relena were all gathered in the living room, nervous as to what Tamara wanted to talk about. She walked in, embarrassed and afraid. "I have something that I need to say, something that's kind of hard," she began.  
  
"What is it?" asked Noin sympathetically. She could sense that something was wrong with her daughter. She had come at the behest of Relena, who had told her that Tamara had been sick and upset the past few weeks. Dragging Zechs with her, she used the excuse that she had to check in at Preventer headquarters. Upon arrival, she knew exactly what her husband's sister meant.  
  
"I'm pregnant with twins," she said, sinking down onto a chair. Against her will, she began to sniffle, which eventually became a soft sob. For one of the few times in her life, she let her tears flow. She cried for the children that she would bear, she cried for Calen, she cried for all that she had wanted that she could never have. Her mom and dad went over to her immediately, her mom giving her a huge hug.  
  
"It's all right, sweetie. We'll take care of you. How did it happen?" Noin asked softly, drying her daughter's tears.  
  
"I guess I drank a little too much at a party. It just sort of happened, Mom."  
  
"Do you know the father," Zechs asked softly. He was contemplating hunting the jerk down when his daughter gave her answer.  
  
"Calen." This only made her cry harder. "He even offered to marry me, but I just couldn't. Everything's getting so weird, and I don't know what to do."  
  
"It's all right, Tamara. We're your family and we're here for you," said Relena, coming over to the chair where the 18 year old had sunk down.  
  
"I guess it's genetic," Noin added in a different, more humorous tone. "Your dad and aunt can't hold their alcohol either. You've got too much of the Peacecraft blood." Tamara managed a small, sad smile.  
  
"Can I stay here?" she asked quietly.  
  
"Of course," Zechs told her. "We're your parents. If you're having kids, you're going to need some help."  
  
"Thank you so much," Tamara told them, leaning back in her chair. "I'm so tired...."  
  
"You will be," Noin told her. "Pregnancy is tough. May yours go better than mine." Then, she leaned down and whispered in her ear. "Just remember that we're your family, and that Calen cares for you, too." Tamara nodded and let out a sigh, leaning back in her chair. She closed her eyes and listened as her family filed out of the room, leaving her alone. They were all so kind to her. She had no idea how much that she would need their help in the days to come.  
  
~*DECEMBER 24*~  
  
At the Christmas party at the Peacecraft manor, the household was a buzz. Catherine was talking to Tamara about the new babies that were on their way. "So, did you get the ultrasounds?"  
  
"Yes. They're so amazing to look at. You can even feel them kick." She took her hand and placed it on her huge belly. "Feel that?"  
  
"Yes!" exclaimed Catherine. "Do you know which one is which in there?"  
  
"The one that's kicking right now is Alex, I think. Vivi is on the left."  
  
"How did you come up with the names?" the brown haired circus performer inquired.  
  
"Well," she replied. "Alexander was..." she paused, looking as if she might go into another emotional breakdown again. She took a deep breath, remembering that she had to keep her stress level down. "Calen's middle name is Alexander, and I thought that it would be all right since no one knows his middle name but me. Alexander Jaedan just seemed like a nice name. Mom wanted me to name her Melea Katerina, and Dad wanted me to name her Lucia Anne. Relena started laughing, and told me to pick my own name."  
  
"Well, I think that Viviane Jael is a lovely name for your baby," Catherine said. "Wow, they're really kicking in there."  
  
Yeah, I guess the Christmas season has them excited, too," Tamara remarked. Then, Catherine could feel something contract. Tamara winced and looked down. "Oh no," she mumbled.  
  
"Sally! Noin!" called Catherine, leaping up from her seat. Sally was the first in, with her husband and daughter close behind.  
  
"What's wrong?" Sally shouted. "Is it starting?"  
  
"I think so," Tamara began. "It felt exactly like you said it would. Like those false contractions only worse." Chang Meiran began to tug at her father's shirt to get his attention.  
  
"Is Ta'ra okay, Dada?"  
  
"She's going to have her baby, Meiran," he explained. Calen got up from the other room, all promises forgotten. He may have promised that he wouldn't get involved with her, but all he knew was that he had to do something. As the Peacecrafts bustled into a car, he turned to Heero as if to ask permission. His uncle nodded to him, and he dashed off to get in his car.  
  
  
Author's notes:  
  
Well, faithful readers? What do you think of this turn of events? Please don't get angry at me! 9dodges rotten tomatoe throw by readers) Be nice and throw chocolate, not tomatoes! And please tell me is you like or if you don't. Don't worry, things will all work out in the end. Send all comments, criticisms, and rotten tomatoes to Chryseisd@aol.com please. Until next chapter, adios! 


	29. Chapter Twenty-Nine

Chapter Twenty-Nine  
  
Tamara had been in the room for twenty hours already. Calen, Zechs, and half of the family were waiting outside. Mariemaia, Sally, and Noin were inside the delivery room with Tamara, who was yelling loudly. "Why won't these **** things come out!" she shouted at the top of her lungs. "Get him in here so I can kill him," she whispered under her breath.  
  
"Noin, I think that it's about time," Sally warned her. "She's dilated to about ten centimeters." Calen, who was listening to al that was happening in the room went to go. Zechs was standing in front of the door, barring his entrance.  
  
"Please, I have to be there for her." Zechs nodded and stepped aside.  
  
"As a father, I understand. Just don't let her grab a hold of your hair." He watched the brown haired kid disappear into the delivery room. He would have made a great father if Tamara would give him the chance. Perhaps they would still have the chance to fix things. His daughter was so headstrong, too much like him. He grinned. It would be amazing to see tiny grandchildren. He wondered what the would look like as he stood outside.  
  
Inside the room, Calen crossed over to the platinum blonde woman who was panting. The other women gave him strange looks as he took a hold of her hand. "I'm so glad you made it," she whispered, her brow dripping with sweat from the labor.  
  
"I wouldn't leave you if death itself came for me," he responded softly. She gave a small smile, and for a moment, they forgot all that they had fought over and the fact that they hadn't talked in months.  
  
"Push, Tamara! Now!" shouted Sally. She began to push as hard as she could, letting Mariemaia tell her what to do with her breathing exercises. Pushing as hard as she could, she cried out. Grasping onto his hand, she could feel everything in her body begin to tingle with the amazing feeling that was running through her. It seemed like an eternity before the two of them heard a cry come out from the other end.  
  
"You have a son," they heard Noin say. She took the baby to get cleaned up as Sally told Tamara to keep pushing. In another hour, Viviane made her entrance into the world. After she refused to turn around and face backwards, Sally had to turn her around and pull her out. Calen held his daughter and looked down at his son, who was sleeping peacefully in Tamara's arms. His wife was sleeping as well after the long ordeal. Noin and Sally had stuck around, and most of the family had filed in to see the newborns. Eventually, they had left the two of them alone.  
  
It made him sad that this would most likely be the last time he would get to hold the babies in a long time. When she woke up, things would go back to normal, and they would go back to their awkward state of not talking. He hugged his little girl close to him. He had always loved the name Viviane. Tamara had never told everyone else that he had come up with that name. After all the fights, he couldn't believe that she still used the names that he had come up with.  
  
She began to stir in her hospital bed. Taking one last look at his daughter, he gave his babies a light kiss on the forehead. Laying Viviane in her mother's arms he looked down at Tamara. Giving her one last sad look, he left the delivery room before she woke up. The last thing she needed was to get into another argument. Why did love have to be so hard?  
  
****************  
  
Tamara was dead tired. She collapsed on the couch, falling asleep almost immediately. The twins were finally asleep, after so much work with them. The twins were already four months old, and they were growing so quickly. They were already walking around the house, and she was convinced that they would be saying words soon. She couldn't be more proud of them, her two babies. Little Alex was so cute, with platinum black hair and ice blue eyes. His sister was going to look more like her father, with the Vaughn brown hair and eyes that were Peacecraft blue, like her brother. She could swear that they both had the intensity and energy of their father in their little eyes, and it sometimes frightened her.  
  
The door to her room sung open, and Calen looked at the exhausted woman asleep on the couch. He pulled a blanket over her and slipped into the twin's room. They were both awake, staring at a brightly colored mobile that was decorated with tiny push gundams. The young man smiled to himself. Tamara had gotten that mobile from Catherine after the babies were born. They looked up at Calen when he came in and Viviane started to giggle. "Daauuhhh" she mumbled. "Daaaah."  
  
"That's right," he told her, picking her up. Her brother copied her, and he picked up his son as well and sat down with them in a rocking chair. "So, did you guys miss me?" They both smiled and gave him a look with their big, wide, blue eyes. "I sure missed you two. I sure feel lucky that I can talk to you guys. And I guess you're talking to me, too."  
  
"Daahhhh," babbled Alex as his dad rocked the four year old back and forth.  
  
"Is that you guy's first word?"  
  
"Daauuhhh," they both chorused together. Then, Viviane began to get a pained look on her face. "Ooooop!" she whined, making a face. She looked about ready to start crying, and Calen figured that the best thing to do would be to check her diaper. Laying her down on the diaper table along with her brother, he gently took off the dirty diaper. Fortunately, she decided not to wail and wake up her mother.  
  
After his daughter got her diaper changed, they both started to get sleepy. Alex gave a little yawn and promptly stuck his tiny hand in his mouth and started to suck on it while he closed his eyes. Viviane merely fell asleep, and before Calen knew it, his babies were fast asleep. He carried Alexander over to the crib first, laying him gently inside. Then, he carried a sleepy Viviane to the crib as well. Covering them up with a blanket, he looked down at his babies. "I love you two so much. I wonder how it's possible to love someone this much after only seeing you a few times? But what I really want is for your mom to forgive me, so I can see you two all the time." He heard the platinum blond woman stir in the other room. "I have to go now. Sleep well, Alex, sweet dreams, Vivi."  
  
He went back to the front room where Tamara was sleeping fitfully on the couch. She had kicked off the blanket, and was obviously having some sort of nightmare. Calen gave her a sad look, wishing that there was something that he could do for her. But they couldn't go back to where they were. He knelt down beside, her, lightly putting a hand on his shoulder. She stopped tossing and turning and lay still, shivering. He pulled the blanket back over her and she grasped it tightly, without waking up. "I'm sorry, Tamara," he said simply, getting up and leaving the Peacecraft mansion.  
  
  
  
Oh my gosh! Chapter 29 already! Wow, it seems like the years are just flying by. Hope you liked this chapter, short but sweet. This chapter is dedicated to Viviane Elizabeth, my "Baby Think It Over" that I got pretty attached to while I had her over the weekend. She was just a mechanical, yet very realistic baby, but it showed me a lot about what babies are like. She became the inspiration for this plot twist, so here's to Vivi, the mechanical baby. Hope Tamara gets more sleep at night than I did! :) Still not the end yet, and there are more action filled, emotional chapters to come. Tune in next time and see how I torture my poor characters. As always, my email is chryseisd@aol.com and I love to get mail, so send me your comments criticisms etc.. Thank you!  
  
  
  



	30. Chapter Thirty

Chapter Thirty  
  
Tamara was outside, working in her garden when she got the call. She watched her twins play out on the grass. May was such a wonderful time of year, and the weather on Earth was pleasant. Her iris were growing beautifully. The kids, who were 17 months old by now, were going along great. They were speaking to each other and to her, which delighted the young mother. Strangely enough, their first word was dada. She found this very funny, but they eventually learned to say mama.  
  
Zechs came out of the house, a phone still in his hand. the look on his face was severe as he handed it to his daughter and went to round up his grandchildren. Play time was over. Wiping her hands off on her jeans, the platinum blond girl answered the phone/ "Hello, Tamara Peacecraft speaking." She listened for a few seconds and almost dropped the phone. "Sure, Mariemaia. I'll be right there." She got u-p and ran to her car. "Dad," she yelled behind her do you mind..."  
  
"Don't worry about it, Ta'ra. Just go as fast as you can," her father called out to her. As quickly as possible, she jumped in and sped off. He stood, watching her drive away. Inside, he felt rather useless. There was a time when he and Noin had been the ones on call in case of emergency. Before this endeavor was over, however, he suspected that he would return to active service in the field.  
  
Once at the Preventer headquarters, Tamara ran up to Mariemaia's office. All of the interns and secretaries got out of her way as the aptly named Preventer Storm marched up. She walked in the door and sat down, unaware of Calen, who was sitting around a table that had been set up. The older New OZ commander turned on a TV and all of the officers sat and watched in horror as a black haired young man walked on and up to a podium. Tamara took one look at him and froze. There was no mistaking who that was.  
  
"Good evening, Earth," he opened, his voice unusually smooth tonight. "You probably don't know me, but I am Trayan Tinten, a citizen of the colonies. I am also now the leader of the Earth Sphere Military Federation. As Commander Octera's second in power, I have full intentions of taking over the reigns. The way that the Sanc Kingdom Alliance had manipulated you is tragic, Earth citizens. You have allowed yourself to be led into a dictatorship where your identity is swallowed by the Peacecraft family. We of the Federation, which I'm happy to say, includes several decent officers from New OZ and the Alliance itself, it hereby declaring war on the Sanc Kingdom. Thank you," he stepped down, dismissing all the questions of the reporters.  
  
Tamara looked on in dread. War was returning. Her children would grow up in a world embroiled in hatred and fighting. She couldn't let that happen. There had to be some way to prevent this. Mariemaia stood at the front and spoke. "Ladies and gentlemen, tomorrow we will meet and 0600 hours to discuss the possibilities of this new development. I want Tamara to be our go between with Preventer. We're going to end their help with this blaze. As of now, New OZ is back in business. Tonight, I want you all to get some rest and think about this. I guarantee, there'll be no more sleep after tonight. Adjourned." She dismissed the others, but beckoned for Tamara to stay.  
  
Mariemaia shut the door as Calen left, the last person to exit the room. She turned to her partner, who was seated at the table. "We have a problem," she said simply. "A big one."  
  
"Agreed. I think I may do some research tonight. The last thing I want is for my twins to grow up in an age where they have to be afraid. I don't want those people attacking the Sanc and our family. I intend to protect my kids, Mariemaia."  
  
"We're going to protect the nation, Tamara. I'm going to need your help. I'm also going to need Lieutenant-Colonel Vaughn's help."  
  
"Lieutenant-Colonel?"  
  
"In case you haven't noticed, Tamara, he's the best soldier we have. You weren't promoting him, so I did. You can't let personal stuff get in the way. He's going to be a full colonel before this is over. We need him as a commander on the battlefield. You need him."  
  
"I don't need him," she argued, her face going to a cold and stony expression. Calen was the last thing that she needed in her life now. She got up abruptly and walked over to the door, crossing in front of Mariemaia. "I'm going to the library. I have a lot of work to do."  
  
"Remember what I said," the older woman told her. Tamara listened, but pushed on through without a word of acknowledgment. Mariemaia watched her go. Tamara was acting so strange lately, denying all of her feelings. She felt a little guilty about getting the two of them into this mess, but knew that they would have to work it out sometime. Sooner or later, they would realize what was blatantly obvious to everyone else. For their sakes, she hoped that it was sooner rather than later.  
  
Tamara, on the other hand, nestled herself into a corner at the Sanc Kingdom National Archives. Grabbing huge tomes on the Eve Wars, she dug into the bunches of history knowledge. Reading accounts of all the different events, she soon found exactly what she was looking for. She grinned a grim smile at this, knowing what she had to do. Peace was worth all costs, and the world would be a safe place for her children. However, the fight for peace did not leave many options. She could only hope that this option would work.  
  
It was a weighty decision for one person to make, and she sat there thinking about it for hours. At last, a librarian came up to her and asked her if something was wrong. "I have a decision to make," Tamara told her. "A very hard decision that could cost lives. And a cause that I don't know if it will succeed."  
  
"Just remember, young one, if your cause is just, like the cause of peace, sacrifices must be made," the librarian told her. "Sometimes, it takes tragedy to bring change." Tamara nodded.  
  
"Yes, but will it take a war?" she whispered. "I only wish that this could all be prevented, but I can't. Not while Trayan is involved. It is up to me, now."  
  
*******************  
  
The next morning, all of the New OZ officers met for a board meeting. Mariemaia gave her report on the remobilization of forces that were preparing for all out war on the Federation. Tamara sat quietly in her chair, looking over the other officials and commanders. They were all outstanding soldiers and individuals, many of them were the most loyal people that she had ever encountered. Something inside of her seemed to have a sense of foreboding as she listened to the reports that each officer gave. At last, she stood at the older commander's side and made her report.  
  
"I wish to withdraw from New OZ. I can no longer stay here within this army," she said simply. "However, my advice to you all is to seek peace, no matter what it takes. Please, protect the Earth and the colonies from destruction. I am no longer able to remain with OZ, but I hope that the Sanc Kingdom Alliance and it's ideals of peace and equality will live on. I have compiled a list of missions, tactical ideas for your army based on my psychoanalysis of Trayan Tinten. Good luck, OZ officers, and farewell." She stepped away. Mariemaia was shocked and followed her out.  
  
"You didn't tell me that you were leaving."  
  
"There are things that I have to take care of."  
  
"What do you want me to do without you?"  
  
"You have Lieutenant-Colonel Vaughn. He will make a much better Commander than I ever did," she told her older friend. "And remember, appearances can be deceiving." With that, the tall platinum blond girl left, leaving the redhead standing there in shock.  
  
A week later, after leaving her kids off with Noin and Zechs, she arrived on Mars colony. She was supposed to meet with Trayan after her speech, and she was prepared to face him once more. Organizing her notes, she met one of the men who was to show her around for the first few days. He give her a tour of her new home for the next few days. She looked around, absorbing everything. Things were running smoothly, which she found to be quite amazing. With a sigh, she headed for the communications room Now was her big moment.  
  
Meanwhile, at New OZ headquarters, Calen had just been informed of his promotion. He sat in the office with Mariemaia thinking about what to do next. They were working out the defensive plan when Minoru burst in. "I think that there's a program that you want to see," he warned. The two of them turned on the TV and were amazed at what they saw.  
  
Tamara stood at a podium, dressed all in black. Her black leather trenchcoat was long, and decorated with silver diamond shaped buttons that reminded Calen of stars. Her usually tied back hair hung loose and her bangs toppled over the cold silver mask. Down to her high heeled boots, she was dressed in black and silver, which reminded Calen of space. Then, she began to speak, confirming her identity as Tamara. "Ladies and gentlemen of Earth and the colonies, war has once more returned to our universe. In these times of conflict, many battles are fought on or near the colonies, my home. I am Arisze, and I was born and raised in the colonies. I shudder to think that they and their citizens will be destroyed by Earth's disputes. Our forces shall put an end to both the Alliance and the Federation. As the commander of Ebony Star, I shall end the injustice shown towards the colonies."  
  
Both of the New OZ commanders sat there, shocked. "She wouldn't do that," Calen muttered. "There's something wrong here. She has to have some type of plan."  
  
"Calen, I can't even tell what she's doing anymore. Ever since that party and having those kids, I can't predict what she's going to do. Tamara is losing control, and we have to stop her."  
  
"We can't hurt her. She must have a secret agenda. And I'm going to find out what it is," he vowed, getting up to leave. Deep in his heart, he refused to accept the fact that she would choose to turn against him. His worst nightmares were coming true, and he was nearly helpless. Mariemaia had given up hope, but he refused to. Somehow, he knew that Tamara would always long for peace in her heart. She always considered everything that she did methodically when it came to battle. When she figured out what she was doing, everyone would come to see the light. For now, he was needed where he was, however.  
  
  
Authors note (AKA, Chrys's incoherent babbling)  
Wow! That was a pretty short chapter. I guess I'm just getting a little excited. Hang in there Quiana, May, and Konie-sama. Thank you for tolerating my evilness for now. I shall try to make it up to you, but please keep reading. Thank you for all your nice reviews. You make a lonely author and her muse very happy. Remember, I live at chryseisd@aol.com if you have any commnets for me or if you just want to talk about gundam wing stuff! 


	31. Chapter Thirty-One

Chapter Thirty-One  
Tamara stood on the bridge of her battleship. It was a grand creation, one that had been rebuilt at top speed. It was landed currently on Mars, which was completely controlled by her loyal forces. There was an enormous benefit in winning over the colonies. Many people on Earth did not realize how influential the colonies were until they stopped receiving their resources.  
Going out of her ship, she made her way to the old embassy building where she was greeted icily by the representatives. Oh well. Let them think her a traitor, she knew exactly what she was doing. Reaching the room where the Federation's new commander was waiting, she pushed her way in. In the room was a small table and two chairs, one of which was occupied by Trayan. He rose to greet her and shook her hand even. My, they certainly were observing strict laws of protocol. Once the door closed, however, things changed.  
"Why?" he mused at first. She was not rattled by his introduction. She had known him to long to be intimidated and long enough to know what he meant.  
"It's none of your business. What is your business is this war. I intend to fight the Federation with all of my forces. And the same goes to the Alliance," she told him coldly. Even Trayan was taken aback at how serious she was. Her usual demeanor was one of strength, but there was always the quality of humanlike warmth to her. Now, it was as if she was masking her humanity along with her face. The Federation commander looked her over, wondering if his mind was still as sharp as it used to be. He found that he could still read her like a book.  
"Well, Arisze, might I inquire where your second in command is?"  
"She is on board my battleship, preparing to leave directly after this meeting."  
"I was referring to the Lieutenant that loved you enough to betray you. Oh, and congratulations on your twins." He expected her to get angry at that comment, but her face still showed no emotion. She really had changed over time. Her demeanor was beginning to scare him. "I'm going to ask you this question again, Commander. Why have you abandoned New OZ and your precious friend?"  
"I left because they could not bring peace."  
"What you are bringing is not peace, crusader. You will only bring more people into the slaughter."  
"What do you think you started, Trayan? A tea party? You had best be ready for war. I take no prisoners."  
"I have reasons for everything I do, Tamara. I am here to regain all that my family has lost. The Tinten's lost their prestige, the Barton's lost their Foundation, and the Octera's lost their lives and their quest for power. I will succeed, Tamara. I only wish that you would not work against me."  
"I shall oppose you until I die, Trayan," she said icily. Her words were ones that she often told him, but they had no feeling in them, not even anger. The Federation commander knew that something was wrong then. Arisze had something planned, and it was not his place to guess what it was. He would be best suited to sit back and watch it unfold.  
"I don't have anything more to say to you, Arisze. Perhaps we can meet again for another attempt at negotiation," he said, standing up. The meeting had been short, and Tamara was thankful. She had a great deal of planning to do before the next week approached. Arranging for a guard to escort Trayan back to his shuttle, she left for her battleship. In her quarters there, she could think and plan about what she was going to do next.  
"Forgive me what I am about to do," she whispered, to no one in particular. Her fingers brushed across the smooth silver surface of her mask. It reminded her that she was no longer Tamara Peacecraft, the very human person that dwelled inside of her. She was Arisze now, the Deathflower. Something inside her told her that she had been Arisze for a very long time, and that this was not so much acting anymore. The transformation was complete. Arisze was ready to show Earth what war truly was.  
She stalked back to her ship, where a call was waiting for her. Naturally, it was from her parents. She was amazed that they kept in touch. Arisze expected them to be mortified and to break off all communications. Her mother was there, staring at her with sad eyes. "Hello, Tamara," she greeted softly.  
"Hello Mother. How have you and Father been? How are the twins?"  
"Your father has been shut in the room for days. I don't know what to do about him, Tamara. Please stop this and come back home. He is blaming himself for everything, and every day, he slips away a little more. Even the twins want to know where you are. Vivi and Alex need a mother to be there for them," Noin explained. She hated the way that her daughter had left so suddenly. And her choice of actions was troubling Zechs to no end. He felt that she was repeating his mistakes, when he wanted her to make up for his own mistakes.  
"I am sorry, Mother. This is the path I have chosen," she explained simply.  
"Tamara, take off your mask. I am your mother, stop this game."  
"This is hardly a game, Mom. Things are different now. I just wanted to let you know that I love you. Can I talk to my babies?"  
"Sure," Noin answered, a little bit exasperated. She picked up Alex, who was getting so big already. "Say hello to mommy, Alex."  
"Hi mama!" he chortled. Then, in his serious little voice, "Why mama go?"  
"I had to, Alex. But mama still loves you lots!" Tamara answered.  
"Mask is on mama!" he shouted then. Carefully, Tamara took off the mask. He probably didn't recognize her with her mask on. Once she took it off, he giggled. "Mama silly," he laughed. She smiled in spite of herself. Noin watched the 17 month old break through "Deathflower's" barrier. Her daughter hadn't changed a bit. She was still soft at the core. Next, Viviane got to talk to her mom, too.  
"Miss you," she said right away.  
"And I miss you tow," her mother promised her from the battleship. That certainly was true.  
"I see Dada if you go bye bye," she informed her mother. "Dada read book. Dada read good." Tamara wanted to laugh at her daughter's simple logic, but she kept a straight face.  
"Be nice to your dad, okay? He loves you as much as I do," she instructed the little girl.  
"You miss Dada too?" This took her by surprise, so she told her daughter what she wanted to hear. There was no use in having the poor girl worry about her parent's problems.  
"I miss your Dada and you two every day."  
"I tell him!" Viviane whispered excitedly. Tamara looked at her babies. They were growing so fast, and she couldn't keep up with them. War never left time or family, especially this war. Deep in her heart, she knew that her parents and Calen would take good care of Alex and Vivi.  
"Mommy has to go bye-bye again. I need to talk to Gram Noin," she told her children.  
"Bye bye," they chorused, waving their little hands. It broke her heart when they were out of view on the screen. Her children were gone to her now. And unless she chose a different path, she had no clue when she would see them again. Lucrezia Noin-Peacecraft returned to find the cold, masked woman on the other end of the line.  
"Tamara, I have to go. Things are getting hectic over here. The kids are getting a little squirrely and your father and aunt will be home soon. Take care of yourself. And please come home before someone gets hurt."  
"I will take care of myself, Mom. Don't worry about me." She waited until the screen went black before collapsing in her chair. Sometimes, she felt as if she should just go back to her two kids. Perhaps they could have run somewhere where the war would not reach. However, she knew that battle would find them and cause tragedy for them. That was not what Tamara wanted for her children. She was determined that her daughter and son would not have scars from mobile suit attacks. It was her duty to see that they grew up in a land of freedom and safety.  
She closed her eyes and began to think of what was coming. There was so much to think about. It would be some time before she could carry out her plan. Until then, she would just have to fight a little. The colonies had always been so painfully oppressed, sending their resources to Earth only to have Earth's forces fight on their soil and destroy their cities. Ebony Star was just what the colonies needed right now, something to boost their morale and their sense of pride.  
Tamara would continue her fight for the colonies and for peace. It had taken her a long time to understand how fighting could make peace. However, she had found that in some cases, words alone could not make things right again. It would take another war before the people would understand how precious peace truly was. They would soon learn that peace was the most wonderful thing that they could have. But as long as humanity existed, there would always be wars, and as long as there were wars, there would be gundams, fighting for the people and for peace.  
  
Hang in there peoples! No matter what, please keep reading this series. Everything will be explained in the end. Thanks!  
~Chryseis 


	32. Chapter Thirty-Two

Chapter Thirty-Two  
  
Duo and his comrades had fought this war for months now. At first, only the gundams had become involved in the war. However, the onslaught of both the Federation forces and the wrath of Ebony Star had forced them to escalate the war and activate the forces of New OZ. The God of Death was needed once more. He regretted having to fight against his niece. She had always been like a daughter to them all. Duo only hoped that Adam, his son, was all right. The young boy had taken over the family business on L-2 when his parents went into active service as Preventer special operatives.  
  
War had been tough on all of them, especially on Zechs. He had been extremely upset when Tamara had taken up the leadership of Ebony Star. At first, he refused to use the Tallgeese III in battle, but after a while he came to his senses. The loss of the little girl that everyone had loved troubled them all, but they were determined to get her back again. Perhaps if they won the war, they could get her back again.  
  
He was currently sitting at table in the Peacecraft manor' dining room, which had become the gundam pilot's dormitory over the past few years. It would be so nice to finally go home and live in his own house after this was over. But until then, he and Deathscythe belonged on the battlefield. He stirred his coffee with a spoon restlessly. There was nothing to do now. It scared him almost. Lately, he had felt as if this was the lull before the storm.  
  
His suspicions were confirmed when Hilde came back in. "Duo," she began in her sweetest voice possible.  
  
"What's wrong, babe?" he asked as she sat down beside him. He gave him a look of sympathy.  
  
"Ebony Star has instigated a battle again. They're going to need you in this one. I've heard from Lady Une that this may be the final battle in this war."  
  
"What are you going to do?"  
  
"Same as you, fight if I can. This is it, our last chance to make a difference," she put a hand on his shoulder. "I only hope that this will all be over soon. Then we can go back home."  
  
"Home is wherever we are," Duo said scooting closer to her. AT that moment, Heero came in, spoiling what was meant to be a romantic moment for the married couple.  
  
"We're leaving now," he informed them. "They need us on the battlefield." Duo gave his wife a quick kiss and got out of his chair.  
  
"See ya later, Hilde," he said, grabbing his jacket.  
  
"Come back alive, Duo," she told him as she watched him leave.  
  
Before the attack, the young commander of Ebony Star had been sitting in her quarters with her books and a photo of her family. Viviane and Alexander were smiling and giggling happily with their grandparents and mother, being picture perfect children. Tamara allowed a sad smile to creep across her face. "I miss you guys. I hope you know that your mother loves you."  
  
Maelora Diem, the second in command aboard the Ebony Star battleship, walked into the commander's room. "Something wrong, Your Excellency?"  
  
"Please don't call me that, Miss Diem. I am no longer a member of OZ," she said in a strange voice. The 23 year old officer looked over at her younger leader.  
  
"Terribly sorry, Commander Arisze, but I followed you through New OZ, and I intend to follow you through Ebony Star as well. And I am proud to say that my family has been fighting for the colonies all of their lives. You are continuing a noble cause."  
  
"Miss Diem, after so long, your whole world becomes enveloped in war and all you want is peace," Tamara sighed, standing up and walking to the window that looked down on Earth. Then, unexpectedly she asked, "Do you have a family of your own?"  
  
"I have parents who are living in the L-5 cluster. Why do you ask?"  
  
"No reason, really. What would you do to protect your family from harm?"  
  
"Anything. That's part of the reason why I am here," Maelora answered, puzzled.  
  
"Good," Tamara said in a low voice. "Don't forget that. Never forget why we are here. As soon as we lose sight of our cause, then we will lose the war."  
  
"Our cause to free the colonies from Earth's oppression?"  
  
"No," said the commander, turning around. "There is something that we are fighting for that is bigger than mere power or control. What we are fighting for are the people and their right to live in a world without fear, without danger lurking around every turn. We fight so that our children will not have to. Once soldiers lose sight of that, they merely become killing machines, inhuman and meaningless. We must keep the cause noble and the meaning of this war in our hearts, or we will all fail." Maelora stood frozen in her spot at this. She had never really thought in depth about Ebony Star's goal beyond liberating the colonies.  
  
"You will liberate the colonies, won't you, Commander?"  
  
"Of course. Before this is done, I intend on liberating all people from this destruction," she answered her. "If you please, I would like to be alone now," Before she could say that, however, Maelora caught a glimpse of the photo.  
  
"Are those your kids?" she asked. Commander Arisze nodded and the older woman picked up the photo. "Who took this picture?"  
  
"Mariemaia Khushrenada-Akamatsu, back when I was in the San Kingdom."  
  
"You left them to come here?"  
  
"They are somewhere safe, somewhere they can grow up without fear. I do what I have to do." Maelora almost frowned at her superior officer. She could feel the coldness of Arisze's facade, and yet, when she talked of her children, she seemed to warm up a little.  
  
"Is their father here on the ship?"  
  
"There is no father," the platinum blond woman said simply, taking the photo back and putting it in her pocket.  
  
"Commander, is there anything I can do for you?" she finally asked, concerned for the younger woman. The commander of Ebony Star stood and looked the black haired woman face to face, blue eyes locking with brown eyes.  
  
"Leave this battleship as soon as you can. I will need your help elsewhere. And after the war, return to your family." With that, the masked blond left the room, leaving her second in command totally baffled.  
  
In the hangar, Tamara smoothed her long black trenchcoat and made sure that her boots were shined and perfect. Today was the day, she could feel it in her blood, coursing through her over and over. There was only one thing that she wished she could do. She would like to talk to her parents, but they were in the middle of the war now, and that was not an option. She thought of her children. They must be so grown up by now..... Calen also crossed her mind. She could almost see his face before her now. If he were here..... Pushing all her personal thoughts away, she focused her mind on her plan. She would need to make the announcement to attack now. It was time to see if her planning had paid off. The final page in the history books was about to be written.  
  



	33. Chapter Thirty-Three

Chapter Thirty-Three  
  
Arisze, in Nova gundam, met Trayan in Triton near Mars colony that day. With all their forces behind them, the two adversaries only glared at each other for a while. Then, with a battlecry, the Federation attacked. The two commanders flew at each other, drawing tirdents and glaives and battling furiously. Trayan came on over the intercom. "How long must we fight like this?" he asked. "Remind me again why I agreed to this."  
  
"We are fighting for all the people to see, Trayan. We are fighitng for peace. I just hope that your plan works."  
  
"I survived last time when I meant to die. I know that I can pull this off."  
  
"I'm sorry I had to turn you down on your offer. There's something that I have to do."  
  
"Remember what I said, Tamara. My mother walked the same path, and..."  
  
"I know, Trayan. And I thank you. What changed you so much? A few weeks ago you were ready to destroy Earth."  
  
"Life changed me, Deathflower. And death changed me as well. I realized who I was, not who my mother wanted me to be." They continued their mock duel, which seemed so real to the bystanders. Colonel Calen Vaughn watched from Battleship Gemini. He could see Nova fight with Triton. Clashing back and forth, he watched and prayed. Heero came up behind him.  
  
"She'll be fine. Tamara is an excellent pilot," he told his nephew in his low, serious voice. Calen nodded.  
  
"Why did she have to leave?" he wondered aloud.  
  
"If I know my niece, she has a plan. Trust her, Calen."  
  
"How can I trust her anymore? Everytime I've trusted her, something happens. She betrayed me, New OZ, everyone. How can this be a plan that will bring peace."  
  
"I myself do not yet know. But she must do what she thinks is right." With that, the man born as Michael Vaughn walked away to prepare Neo-Wing Zero for battle. Calen stayed there, watching the battle. Everytime the glaive and trident crashed, his breath caught in his throat. It should have been him out there, no her, he decided. The world needed her. Little did he know how much the world really did need her...  
  
Back on the battlefield, the two pilots were making final arrangements. Everything ws going according to plan. "Remember what I said, Deathflower. Don't forget it," Trayan told her, his usually hard and cold voice softer than usual.  
  
"I won't Trayan."  
  
"Can you forgive me for lying to you?"  
  
"I already have. Don't worry about me. I've made my peace. You'd better go now. Just remember, you'll only have a few seconds. Whatever you do, activate cloak or we're both screwed."  
  
"Roger that. Goodbye, Deathflower. I hope you accomplish your goal."  
  
"I will. Thank you for all that you've done, Trayan. We will bring peace."  
  
"We can only pray. I'm ready now." Nova gundam's glaive came down across Triton's rebuilt frame, slicing a hole in it. Inside, she could practically see Trayan climbing into the small escape module with its cloaking advice. She heard him over the intercom jsut as Triton began to sparkle with the lights of destruction. "May peace prevail." The masked pilot nodded. Suddenly, the mobile suits stopped as Triton gundma blew apart into millions of pieces which hung in space, a charred reminder of the Federation's objectives.  
  
"Trayan Tinten of the Earth Sphere Military Federation has been eliminated," Commander Arisze announced. "And I now challenge Calen Vaughn, who has betrayed the colonies and joined Earth's forces, to a duel. Face me, Vaughn," she called out. Before long, she spotted the shadow of Swiftstrike. Knowing exactly what he would do, she stood there confidently.  
  
"I accept your challenge, Commander," he answered slowly. She could tell from his voice that it was hard for him to say those words. Her heart began to beat faster as his gundam neared hers. She chided herself for getting so emotional. It was all part of the plan. Uncloaking, Swiftstrike appeared before Nova, the gundam that had once been its partner.  
  
"It's nice to see you again, Calen," she began, speaking directly to him as she hadn't for a long time.  
  
"Why, Tamara? I'm not going to fight you." Tamara's face was arely able to mask her sadness when she flew at him, attacking the man who had once been her best friend. He blocked the slashes from her glaive with his double beam saber. "Why are you doing this? You aren't acting like the girl I met at Victoria."  
  
"The girl you met at Victoria is gone, Calen. This is who I am now. I am Arisze, the Deathflower."  
  
"You still haven't answered my question," he demanded as they continued fighting. "What made you leave your babies with Noin and Zechs? Why did you just abandon us all?"  
  
"Calen, for peace, one must make sacrifices."  
  
"All that you have made is war, Tamara. How can peace come from this?"  
  
The girl in the black trenchcoat sighed and turned on her vidphone. The sight of Calen's face, with his green eyes that always made her heart stop. His eyes looked so sad now as he was fighting her. She had never seen him look quite like that.  
  
"Please, Tamara. Talk to me face to face." Without hestitation Tamara took off her mask. They continued dueling much the way they had started, with Tamara attacking and Calen defending himself. There were times when she truly wondered why she was here. She could be in some far away colony right now, with her parents, her twins, and with Calen. But peace was bigger than her, bigger than Calen. Peace was worth fighting for.  
  
"Peace, Calen. You wnat to know why and I'll tell you. Peace," she said softly. He looked into the depths of her blue eyes, trying to figure out what that meant.  
  
"How can you bring peace by more fighitng? The Federation is through, so let's end this war with Ebony Star."  
  
"No, Calen. I can't do that. Someone would return and make another war. The people must rise up and protest this war. They must beocme so disgusted with war that they will never again dare to battle with each other. That is what Ebony Star will do."  
  
"You're only killing more people this way, Tamara. The girl I used to know would have hated that. You used to give me names of innocent civilians that were killed by the Federation. You used to care. What happened?"  
  
"Life happened, Calen. I was reading a book not long ago. I looked, and I have made my mind up. I know what I have to do. Do you?"  
  
"I can't fight you," he told her simply.  
  
"You're fighting me, Calen. And you will defeat me," she responded.  
  
"Do you really think that I could kill you?" he demanded, half of him angry at this comment. "After all those years together, you think that I could kill you with the gundams that we built together?"  
  
"I know that you are the better warrior. You have the best chances at winning."  
  
"I am not a warrior. All I have thought about for months is peace and the twins. Do you know what I would give just to go away somewhere? Every night, I dream of having the family together, but you refuse to let that be. Why?"  
  
"I was afriad, Calen. You have no idea how afraid I was when I found out that I was pregnant. There were so many emotions, like anger, that filled me. I will alwys regrets letting them conquer me. I still regret that. But the twins will grow up in a good, loving home."  
  
"You are their mother. Are you going back to them?"  
  
"I will always be with my babies to watch over them, Calen. Do you think I have lost my humanity?"  
  
"I wonder sometimes. You're scaring me, Tamara. I don't know you anymore." Breathing out, she let the breath escape from her lungs. Deep inside of her, she felt something change. A half smile spread across her face, the smile that she had given him occasionally six years ago.  
  
"I'm here, Calen. Deep inside myself, the girl you met still lives. I still remember everything, Calen. And that's what makes it so hard."  
  
"Hard to do what?" he asked.  
  
"Calen, throughout history, people have engaged in war. It always takes tragedy to bring people together. I have read the history books, Calen. This will bring peace to Earth. And peace is more important than me or us. But remember, it is only the end of the beginning. She swung her glaive and Calen blocked it with his double beam saber. Suddenly, the silver lines of destruction began to glow faintly on her gundam.  
  
"Arisze!! Noooooooo!!!" screamed Calen.  



	34. Chapter Thirty-Four

Chapter Thirty Four  
  
Tamara bowed her head and let her hand slip off the self destruct button. "It is not merely the death, but the cause that makes a martyr," she quoted. "Napolean Bonaparte, an ancient person from Earth said that. With my death, peace shall come."  
  
You can't die.." Calen mumbled. His heart had stopped. No, it hadn't stopped, but it was beating with hers, and when hers stopped, he felt as if his would, too. "You can't leave me."  
  
"I need you to look after them, Calen. You need to take care of Viviane and Alexander. I need you to maintain the peace. You have always been a wonderful person, Calen. The world needs you to guide it so that it can become a world of peace. I need you to stay behind and watch over our children. Right now, though, I have to make an important call." She contacted her mom and dad, who were standing together, terrified at the scene that they were watching. When their daughter showed up on the screen, she captured their full attention.  
  
"Hello, Mother, Father. This, I suppose, is my last good-bye."  
  
"Tamara! Stop this!" her father begged her. Zechs was desperate. How could he have let his daughter repeat his own mistakes? This just couldn't be happening to him...  
  
"Father, I have to do this. I hope that you understand and won't blame yourself. I am doing this for you and for Mom."  
  
"We love you, Tamara," Noin said, sensing the severity of the call. Sadness enveloped her as the thought that this might be the lst time she ever saw her daughter crossed her mind.  
  
"I have to know one thing. Are you proud of me?"  
  
"Of course," Noin said, letting a single tear escape. Tamara had grown up so much. Memories of a tiny pink baby filled her head. Then, she had grown into a book loving toddler. So many nights had been spent as a family. And then, she grew up, becoming the woman that they had all hoped she would be. They even got to see her become a mother herself, caring for her children like Noin had once cared for her. "Oh, Tamara."  
  
"Father. Are you proud of me?" Zechs closed his eyes, remembering when he was six. He had asked his father that same question, the night before his life had fallen apart. His father had been upset with him then, and had told him that he would be proud if he behaved himself better. All throughout his life, Zechs had wondered if his father had been proud of his son. "No father could be more proud of a daughter. I love you, Ta'ra," he said, his voice breaking.  
  
"Thank you, Daddy. I love you so much. Good-bye." Her voice trailed away, and Zechs sat down hard in the chair. Unconsciously, tears began to well up in his eyes. How wonderful his little girl had become. He truly was proud of her.  
  
Back in her gundam, Tamara was fighting to keep a straight face. She turned her vidphone back on with Calen. "There is something I have to tell you, Calen."  
  
"What is it, Tamara."  
  
"I lied to you."  
  
"What?" he asked her, his green eyes questioning.  
  
"I lied all that time. I wish that I hadn't pushed you away. I want you to raise those kids, take care of them for me. Tell them that their mother loves them and that she died for them." The silver lines of destruction were more prominent now. They glowed brightly, telling her that she didn't have much time left. Calen shook his head.  
  
"You can't leave. I love you, Tamara. I love you." There. He had said it aloud to her. She smiled a sad smile, as tears of joy ran down her cheeks.  
  
"I know, Calen. Thank you for all that you have done. You were my friend when I had no one. You were the one who helped me when I was helpless. You taught me about life, friendship, and love. The only thing that kept me in this world so long was you. You are my star, Calen."  
  
"And you are my Arisze. I never did tell you why I called you that. It is because the Arisze is the most beautiful flower of all when it opens up. I love you, Tamara." He couldn't seem to stop saying that, but it seemed the right thing to say right now.  
  
"That night," Tamara began. "It wasn't the alcohol that made me kiss you. I just didn't want to admit the truth."  
  
He gave her his classic quirky smile. "I'm going to miss you." The lines brightened and she closed her blue eyes. As he watched the explosions in Nova start, her vidphone screen turned to static. His heart began to beat so loudly that he could barely hear anything else. Then, the explosion came, lighting up the night sky like a nova, ironically enough. Just before that, he heard her voice for the last time speak the words that would be with him forever.  
  
"I love you, Calen."  
  
Time seemed to stop for a moment as he watched the gundam explode. He was barely aware when he yelled out, screaming at the world for its injustices. Angrily, he snapped on his vidphone onto the government network that broadcasted news on the war 24 hours a day. "Did you see that?" he raged. "Did you see what just happened? She died for all of you, she died for peace. That girl just left behind the two beautiful babies, a mother, and aunt, and a family that loved her. She sacrificed everything to save you. What are you going to do? Will you waste her life by continuing this pointless war. All that comes from it is endless death. Is it worth it? Do you even know what you are fighting for anymore? Almost everyone knows or loves someone that has died in this war, whether or not they were even in the military. Why must this pointless slaughter continue? Now, the decisions are left in your hands. With every second that you support this war, more people like yourselves, more people like her, are dying. Can you live with that?" He began to break down with suppressed sorrow and grief. "Can you live knowing what you have lost? Will you ever know what we have lost in this war?" Then, softer, "Will I ever live, knowing that she's gone?"  
  
Across the world, people listened to the young man on television. One woman, sitting in her house began to agree with him. "To think! The Princess Tamara Peacecraft, killed in a war! And I never knew that she had kids, bless her. That young gentleman is right, we have to take a stand to stop this," she told her husband with a passion.  
  
Another man in Switzerland also found meaning in the speech. "You know, he's right. My brother's family was killed in the war, and he never served an hour. It's time that someone stood up for us."  
  
All over the world, there began to be a new outlook on life. At Federation and Ebony Star bases, people began to riot, demanding peace. The mobile suits finally had to be self detonated, to the delight of cheering crowds. All over the world, people were banding together to rid Earth of war. The mood of the colonies was even more joyful as they terminated the use of mobile suits for destruction in space. Watching as they burned, the people agreed with each other on one thing: that peace was needed for Earth and the colonies to survive.  
  
In his gundam, Calen sat for a while, his heart only faintly beating. "My heart is still going, Tamara. But I'll never be the same without you," he whispered. Then, he got a call over the intercom from Shinigami himself.  
  
"Hey, Vaughn. Guess the party's over," he said. Calen didn't miss the sadness in his voice.  
  
"We won, but it feels like an empty victory without you. It's not like I thought it would be. There's no fairy tale ending this time. No riding off into the sunset for us, I guess. I shall try my best. After all, it is only the beginning of the end.  
  
  
  
  
  
This chapter was really short, sorry! I was going to hook it in to the last one, but finding a starting and stopping place lately is tough. Well? This certainly is a change of events. Before you get mad and think I've just made Calen miserable forever, keep reading. As always, I do not like tomatos, so have the kindness to throw other vegetables at me virtually if you are displeased. Those who want to reach me can send their mail to Chryseisd@aol com if they want to send me a comment, criticism, or anyhting of the sort. Thank you for reading my fic!!!!  



	35. Chapter Thirty-Five

Chapter Thirty-Five  
  
Mariemaia had great difficulty sitting with her husband through the funeral. Tamara had been so young, so innocent. And now, she was gone. Noin had been distressed greatly. A private funeral was being held now, so that her father could attend. There would be a public funeral later, after which her coffin would be ceremoniously laid to rest beside Mariemaia's own father as well as by the tomb of Milliardo Peacecraft. The people had taken great sympathy for the girl who was once princess of the Sanc Kingdom. People around the universe had finally found a cause to fight for, Mariemaia's only regret was that it took her death to prove that.  
  
Noin was sitting in the front with Zechs, both of them too shocked to do much of anything. Zechs in particular had still not gotten over what had happened in the final battle between Earth and space. Her words rang over and over again in his mind. "Are you proud of me?" Ever since she had been a baby, he had felt an overwhelming pride inside of him. Holding her in his arms for the first time, hearing her begin crying when she finally came into the world. All the knitting that he had to do for her..... Where had the years gone? How had she changed from the solemn little girl into the responsible and courageous adult? As a parent, he thought, no one could be more proud of a child.  
  
Duo was acting as priest for the funeral. He was even different, not in his usual perky mood. Everyone was mourning for Tamara. It had rained for days, which many people claimed that proved that even Mother Earth was mourning for all those who had died in the war.  
  
Calen sat with his children, who could barely understand what was going on. "Mommy go bye-bye?" Alexander asked.  
  
"Yes, son. Mommy went bye-bye. But she's still watching over you. She's just your guardian angel now."  
  
"Mommy be an angel?" Viviane asked curiously. "She fly?"  
  
"She flies around making sure you two are OK. She loves you guys, and I love you too." He hugged his kids, who were trying to copy their grandfather's solemn look. It almost made him laugh in the middle of her funeral. That would have made her smile, he thought. Perhaps it did make her smile. Perhaps she was watching them right now, flashing one of her rare smiles that were like arisze flowers, fleeting and seldom, but beautiful.  
  
Duo, who had known her well, gave an excellent sermon for her. He ended with what she had said, that they all needed to protect the new peace. As it ended, Zechs out a hand on Calen's shoulder. "She loved you," he told the young man. "I don't know if she told you, but she wanted you back more and more every day."  
  
"I know," he responded. Then thinking back to the feeling that they had shared the night that they had gone to the party, he continued. "Sometimes, you don't need to say anything at all. You just know." Zechs nodded. He remembered well the feeling that he himself had discovered as a teen. It was earth shattering when you looked at your best friend and suddenly saw them differently. It was hard the way that you always managed to argue and mess things up when your intentions were good. How Noin had survived life with him still amazed the ex-pilot.  
  
"I love you, Noin," he said, hugging his wife close. "I just wanted to say that. We don't know how long we have on this planet." Noin lay her head on his shoulder, closing her eyes. Perhaps if she didn't think about it so much, her heart would stop hurting. She could tell that Zechs was only keeping up a strong facade. Inside, he was torn worse than she. Tamara's death had affected everyone on Earth.  
  
Duo finished up what he was saying and stepped down, almost crying himself. It was sad that the little girl that everyone had taught illegal acts was gone now. He remembered when she used to come over and stay with them at the junkyard. She loved to make things out of junk or even play pretend. Everyone had something that they remembered about the little girl.  
  
As Zechs and Noin left the chapel room of the Peacecraft manor together, Zechs whispered in Noin's ear. "What is she's still alive out there somewhere. That Octera kid survived the detonation of his gundam. Heero survived being thrown from his gundam and onto his head. Why couldn't she be alive out there somewhere?"  
  
"Zechs," Noin replied. "Let her rest in peace. She's gone."  
  
*************  
  
Mariemaia was sitting in her office at the embassy. Lately, she had become a Sanc Kingdom diplomat, which was no small task. She was working with Lady Une and Relena to put the world back together again. It looked as if Earth might return to forming nations with predetermined and fixed borders. Everyone agreed to that measure, and she was staying late to file paperwork. Taking one more look at the test on her desk, she smiled to think of how she would break the news to Minoru when he got home. At last, they would have children of their own after months of trying.  
  
She opened the next envelope on the pile that was marked with an official New OZ seal. That puzzled her, since the organization had been officially disbanded. She pulled out the contents, which were mostly photos. She took one look at the photos and let out a cry. Calen, who had his office near hers rushed in. "Mariemaia? Is something wrong?" Mariemaia couldn't say a word, no matter how hard she tried. Calen picked up the photos that had dropped to the floor and looked at them.  
  
"Oh my god," he said, looking in horror at them. "No..." The pictures showed masses of debris floating through space. White and silver pieces of Nova were drifting about, suspended in time and in memory. Among the debris lay something very still. A human being. The space suit worn over the old New OZ uniform was painfully familiar. What was the most terrible was seeing the burns and the blood in the picture. Whisps of platinum blonde hair tinged with the colors of death strayed out from underneath the helmet.  
  
After all these months, everyone was hoping that she was alive, by some strange miracle. Calen looked over the reports frantically, searching for some hope. He did not find it. The New OZ investigators reported that they were not able to recover the Commander's body, however, they took a few pictures of who they thought to be her. Most of it was drivel, that said that they were sorry for her death and that they sent their condolences to the family. Calen's heart almost stopped again. Just to see her like this was too much. He tossed the pictures onto her desk.  
  
"She really is gone, isn't she?" Mariemaia asked, her voice loud and cracking as she stood there in shock. Then, a secretary came in, wondering what the commotion was.  
  
"Is something wrong, Mrs. Akamatsu?" she asked politely.  
  
"No, but thank you, Erin," replied Mariemaia.  
  
"Oh, and there's a call for you, Vice Foreign Minister Vaughn," Erin told them before politely leaving. Calen followed her, his mind churning. He had been taking care of the kids, who were more amazing that he ever could have imagined them to be. It was so strange to be a single parent, taking care of them all by himself. He wished that she was there beside him to help and guide him through it all. He had hoped that she would mysteriously live through, but the pictures seemed to show him the truth. He needed to stop living in the past and start living in the future like she would have wanted.  
  
He took the call, which was from a diplomat from the colonies asking for a meeting with him. "Could we meet on Friday for a dinner meeting," she suggested. "Say, around seven?"  
  
"I'm sorry, Representative Hishida, but I have to take care of my twins on Friday night. They're over 24 months old, you see, and I need to spend as much time with my family as possible."  
  
"Oh," she said abruptly. "I didn't know that you had a family." She certainly changed her attitude quickly! Calen grinned to himself. How Tamara would laugh if she heard this conversation. She had little tolerance for those like Miss Hishida who became involved in politics and didn't care about the people.  
  
It was then that he realized that he hadn't smiled in a long time. He turned off his phone. Then, reaching for his pager he unclipped it. Turning that off, too, he laid it in a desk drawer. When all communication devices had been taken care of, he grabbed his coat and left his office. Erin stood outside, puzzled at the Vice Foreign Minister's behavior. "Sir?" she asked as he went to walk out.  
  
"I'm taking off early, Erin. I've spent too much time away from my family already." With that, he sailed on out the door. The young blond woman shook her head. She should probably take off early to go see her family. Looking back at her desk, she made up her mind. The paperwork could wait.  
  
Once he reached his car, Calen knew exactly where he wanted to go. He headed first to a small florists shop that few people ever went to. He picked out some arisze flowers their beautiful mauve petals soft and silky and still dotted with the morning dew. He smoothed their petals with his fingers reverently as the florist made change for him. He then took his bouquet and returned to the place that he had visited a lot lately.  
  
Walking through the cemetery, a strange feeling seemed to wrap around him. He felt closer to her here, as if she could remain in the mortal world here. Reaching her grave, he cleared away all the wreaths, bouquets, and other tributes that wad been left by those who still worshipped her cause and her sacrifice. She was like the ancient princess Diana, the people's love. However, it was the arisze flower that dominated the grave. Also, a small picture, care of Viviane and Alex, lay on the grave along with their offering of dandelions and violets.  
  
"They left you flowers, Tamara. Those kids miss you like crazy. They're always asking, 'where's Mommy?' What do I tell them? Please help me, Tamara. Watch over those kids as best you can. I don't know how well I'm doing while I'm trying to raise these kids." He knelt in front of the tombstone, running his had across its white marble surface. "You should be here with us," he whispered. "You were wrong, we do need you. The kids need you, your parents need you, and I need you." With that, he rose, turning away from the cold stone.  
  
"Why couldn't you have lived? Why did they have to take those pictures?" He remembered the pictures of Tamara, her body floating in space, motionless and injured so horribly. It was too much to bear, and he pushed it away. After a year of hoping that she would magically return, the report had crushed his hopes. He simply loved her too much to allow himself to believe that she was truly gone.  
  
Noin had told him something that had helped a great deal. "Don't hold onto the past," she suggested. "The more you hold on to the one you lost, the more you get pulled into your own despair. Just try to move on with your life and soon, you'll find that you'll find happiness."  
  
"I have to move on from here, Tamara. I will keep all of my promises to you. I have to get home. Your parents have to leave at 9 and I need to be there for the twins." Suddenly, rain started to fall. Lightning flashed through the sky, followed by rolling peals of thunder. "I guess it really is time to go home," he murmured, heading back to his car.  
  
At last, he was home, pushing through the door. His house was serene; the kids must be asleep. They were sleeping through the night now, fortunately. He set all of his files down on the kitchen table of the little house that he had bought after he became Vice Foreign Minister. It would be a nice place for Alexander and Viviane to grow up. It had enough bedrooms for all of them. Another thing that attracted him to the place had been its huge yard, where they could play when they got older.  
  
He checked on the kids, who were sleeping in their cribs upstairs. They were both so wonderful, he thought. Viviane was growing to favor him more, but she still had her mother's wit. Alexander looked like Zechs, but he reminded Calen of himself as a little one. They were so wonderful, Tamara's legacy that she had left him. "I love you guys," he whispered, careful not to wake them up.  
  
With that, he collapsed onto the couch in the front room. It had been such a day! He listened to the rain pound against the side of the house and the thunder crash outside. She had always loved to listen to the rain, and to stand out in it together. They always used to do that, standing in the rain and just enjoying being together. His doorbell rang then. It was probably Noin, coming back because she forgot something. Calen sighed and pulled himself to his feet. Opening the door, he looked up to make eye contact. He stopped, his heart pounding.  
  
"Sorry it took me so long. I've spent my entire life making it here."  
  
  
  
I told you that things would get better! This is still not the end! Please keep reading. Thank you for all of those who stuck with me through Tamara's *death*. I loved to hear from all of you. As always, my email is at chryseisd@aol.com and I love to get email and talk to people. Please feel free to write to me! Well, I'd best get to work on the next chapter. Until next time!  
  
  



	36. Chapter Thirty-Six

Chapter Thirty-Six  
  
He stepped aside, letting her in. She was dripping wet from the storm. For a few moments, he couldn't believe that she was real. "Tamara," he finally managed to exclaim, hugging her close. She noticeably winced.  
  
"Careful, Calen. I'm still pretty sore. But you should know that not even death could keep me from you." She looked sore and tired. He ran to the bathroom and returned shortly with some towels. She accepted them wordlessly and let him take off her black trenchcoat and lead her over to the couch in front of the fireplace. She looked sore and soaked after so much walking. This little house seemed so cozy, so much like the house that she pictured when she thought of a family home.  
  
"What happened to your hair?" he asked, running a hand through what was left of her once long, flowing platinum blonde mane. It now fell a bit below her shoulders, cut shorter than he had ever seen it before. Her bangs remained as they always had, covering the right side of her face.  
  
"It got burned, Calen. It took me four months to come out of a coma. I'm just lucky that someone found me before I ran out of oxygen. I ended up with some pretty nasty scars." She gestured to her right side and to one of her legs, which was badly scarred from when it had been burned. "The doctors had to put me back together again."  
  
"Why did it take you a year to come back? Didn't you think of me, the kids?" He was hurt. She could have come back, eliminating months of pain and misery that he had spent before moving on with his life.  
  
"Calen, after the explosion, I was totally crippled for a while. I was in a wheel chair for months. For so long, I thought that I might as well be dead. You looked as if you had moved on when I saw you on television, and I decided that you didn't need a traitor like me back in your life. But I realized something a few days ago. I need you. I need you like water, like air. I need you in my life. Will you let me come back, even after all the things that I said to you?"  
  
"Only if you promise to stay here with me," he said, moving in closer to her.  
  
"I promise. I wasn't lying when I said that I loved you." She bowed her head and then rested it against his shoulder. "I'm just so tired, Calen. I've spent so long just trying to figure everything out. You don't know what it's like, lying in a hospital with only your inner thoughts to torture you. I tried to leave, I sat at a bus stop for hours, not being able to get on a bus and ride away from here. I just sat there with a small bag of the stuff that I needed, waiting for a bus to take me to redemption. Then, a little girl wandered up to me and offered me a dandelion. She asked me where I was going. I told her that I didn't know, honestly. She asked me if I was with anyone. She was going with her family to Belgium. Then, she asked me if I had a family. I told her that I had a daughter and a son somewhere. She asked me if I was going to them. I said no and she asked me why. That made me think, why wasn't I going home to my babies. Why did I keep running away. Trayan told me something once. His mother had hat  
ed his father once she had him. She had done everything in her power to bring him down, letting bitterness consume her. I don't want that to happen to me, because I care about you too much."  
  
"I'm glad you came back," he whispered. They sat on the couch a long time, just looking at each other. Even if the house fell down around them, neither of them would notice. It was just enough for them to be together at last.  
  
When Zechs and Noin came back in after an hour, they saw the two and stopped dead cold. Tamara had fallen asleep cuddled up against Calen, her face serene, as it had never been before. Calen, in turn, was asleep as well, his head leaning on Tamara's. Zechs almost stooped down and woke her up, but Noin stopped him.  
  
"We have the rest of our lives to talk to her. Now, it's their moment. Let them sleep," Noin chided softly. She went over and grabbed her bag that she had forgotten beside a chair.  
  
"Maybe we should take the kids home with us?" Zechs suggested. "They probably want to be alone this weekend."  
  
Oh, you just want to play with the kids," Noin teased as they walked up the stairs. The kids were awake and playing in their crib. While Zechs scribbled a note for them, Noin walked over to the babies. "Come on guys, it's time to come with grandma!" They made their way downstairs with the kids, who spotted their parents on the couch.  
  
"Mommy!" exclaimed Alex, pointing to Tamara.  
  
"Mommy with Daddy!" said Viviane, looking over to where her brother was pointing.  
  
"That's right. Now, you'll have both a mommy and a daddy. But for now, let's let them sleep." The two Peacecrafts carried their grandchildren out. Zechs smiled. History loved to repeat itself. He was just glad that she was alive, after all of those months of waiting and worrying. Now, he fully understood how Noin must have felt waiting for him to return. Looking from his granddaughter in his arms to his wife and grandson, he smiled. They had the rest of their lives to be together.  
  
********  
  
Tamara could feel a breeze blowing into the apartment. The breeze was warm, comforting, and there was something about it that made her feel safe and protected. She sighed out, not believing quite where she was. She opened her eyes, her blue eyes locking with Calen's green ones. She grinned and he replied with a quirky smile. "You look so peaceful when you're sleeping," he mused aloud.  
  
"How long have you been watching me for?" she asked, sitting up and putting her legs on the floor. She yawned a huge yawn and her smile widened.  
  
"About half an hour," he told her. They sat there, looking at each other for a while, neither of them able to believe what was going on.  
  
"I'm sorry," Tamara said finally.  
  
"Sorry for what?"  
  
"For leaving you. Can you forgive me?"  
  
"Of course. I already have, Tamara, you know that." Her smile faded and she looked outside of the house. The dark clouds of last night's storm had left, leaving the sky clear. A beautiful sunrise with brilliant colors spread across the sky. "Do you want to go out on the porch?" he asked her.  
  
"Sure," she replied, going out the door. He didn't follow her, and she peeked her head back in the screen door. "Calen? You coming?" she called. He came down the stairs.  
  
"Just wanted to check on the kids. There's a note for you." She read it and smiled. Her parents were so wonderful to take the kids off their hands for a while. "Let's go," she urged him, pulling him outside. They went out and stood on the wooden porch, watching the horizon.  
  
"Tamara, I have something to say,"  
  
"Yes."  
  
"Yes? What? How?" Tamara laughed.  
  
"I know you too well, Calen." She smiled and he grinned too.  
  
"Well, it's not as romantic as I planned it, but..." He pulled the ring box out of his pocket. "I've had this for a while, but never got up the courage to ask you. It belonged to my mother long ago. He opened the box, revealing a gold and diamond ring. It had two beautifully cut stones.  
  
"I love the shape of the stones."  
  
"The marquis cut," he joked, slipping the ring on her finger. Then, on a different not, "You know, the kids are gone?"  
  
"What do they think we're going to do home alone?" Calen raised an eyebrow at her.  
  
"Let's just enjoy the sunset," she said, pulling him onto a bench. They sat together for the longest time, just enjoying the sunset. Mariemaia Khushrenada-Akamatsu stood watching from a distance.  
  
"History is much like an endless waltz, the three beats of love, loss, and reunion going round and round. So it should be."  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
"So, you're coming aren't you?" Mariemaia asked her friend over the vidphone.  
  
"yes, I just finished getting everything in order. I'll be right down. How is everyone doing?"  
  
"Well, the kids are running around. Your rugrats sure like playing with the Chang kids. At least Alex can play with Julian Akamatsu. They're growing up so fast, Tamara. You really should be here."  
  
"Well, being chief of Preventer has it's responsibilities," she explained. "But I'm coming."  
  
"Maybe you can get your husband out of the kitchen, then."  
  
"As long as it's not my father," she joked, getting up out of her chair. "I'll see you when I get there." Picking up her jacket, she thought of all that she was coming home to- two beautiful three year olds, a wonderful husband, and a loving family. Her thoughts turned to the gundams that were hidden under the lake at Victoria. They would never be need again. Together, they had created a new world. She headed out of the almost deserted building. Snow was falling. Maybe they could have a snowball fight later on.....  
  
  
  
  
IT'S THE END!!! (or is it?) {insert dramatic music}  
  
No, just kidding. As Trayan would say, it's the end of the beginning.  
  
Well, did you enjoy the series? I think that this may be the last chapter! Now, I will try to work on other series, or if reviewers want more, I guess I could try to continue this one. However, I think that I should stop torturing Claen and Tamara and let them live in peace with their twins. As always, send your reviews to me at chryseisd@aol.com to tell me what you think. I would just like to thank a few people now for all their help on this fic.  
  
  
All the people who reviewed, thank you so much!  
  
May and Qiana Peacecraft-Yuy ~ Thank you for reviewing throughout the whole story! Your reviews were so gret, and gave me lots of ideas and encouragement.  
  
Jayde- Thanks you so much for putting my stuff up on your site!  
  
KONEKO- Konie-sama, without you, I don't know how I would have gotten through this. It would have been so different if not for your help. I probably wouldn't have even discovered fanfiction.net without you. Thank you for your reviews, your encouragement and your ideas! 


	37. Calen's Poem: Aishiteru

These are some poems I wrote last year that I found. They were meant to be companions to Shattered Serenity. This one is from Calen's perspective, taking place after Tamara 'dies' in the last battle.  
  
  
Aishiteru  
  
Whispering Wind  
Blowing the blooms about  
Sweeping flowers from white marble  
As I lay a letter  
Down here for you  
  
So much to say  
That we never quite said  
There was far too much denial  
And I should have told you  
Aishiteru  
  
As I walk home  
A home that fells so lonely  
To children who will never know  
The way their mother was  
How I miss you  
  
Death came too soon  
It exchanged your life for peace  
As I sink down on the old couch  
I find myself thinking  
I can't go on  
  
Then my doorbell rings  
And I open my door  
And then, there you are, dripping wet  
My deathflower, Arisze  
Back once again 


	38. Tamara's Poem: Memoirs of a Deathflower

The companion piece to "Aishiteru." As the title states, these are the thoughts of Tamara right before she self detonates Nova, what she believes to be her last thoughts.  
  
Memoirs of a Deathflower  
  
So much to think of:  
My mother  
Who has always been there for me  
My father  
Who thinks of me as his redemption  
And you  
Who loved me  
  
So much to think of:  
War  
And it's everlasting struggle  
Revolution  
Part of history's endless waltz  
Peace  
That I have striven for all my life  
  
So much to think of:  
My children, in your hands  
My world, in your hands  
And the future, in your hands  
  
And so this is my final good-bye  
This is my lat chance to tell you  
We never really admitted  
The truth that we hid so well  
  
As silver lines of destruction  
Run across me, stealing time away  
You voice almost makes me regret  
This decision I have made  
  
Before I go  
There is one thing I must say  
I just hope you know  
"Aishiteru" 


End file.
